Until
by keroberus
Summary: Amalgam is on the prowl again but can Sousuke keep Kaname safe before Leonard convinces her to switch sides? A story of Kaname's journey through the dark side to end it all, one way or another, and Sousuke's struggle to save her. AU. Finished 9/1/09.
1. Prologue, Prelude to a Fish

Prelude to a Fish

Kaname looked over the perfectly calm ocean horizon and at the scattered trail of down feather clouds that hung motionless in the glowing orange sky. A slow, gentle breeze stirred her long hair, and caused scattered strands to fly up and mingle with his. She stole a quick glance over to where he sat, so close, and checked his expression. As always, his thoughts were not immediately discernable. There was a mix of stern concentration and anxiety, but still he looked content somehow, and it almost looked as though a small upward curl had formed at the corner of his mouth.

She watched as he waited patiently for a fish to bite. His silhouette against the setting sun was statuesque. Certainly, he cut a handsome profile against the sky, and even the scar on his cheek lent him some distinguished charm. She smiled secretly to herself. After their ordeal with Gauron and the hijacking of the Danaan, Sousuke had brought her here to his favorite thinking and fishing spot for some quality time together. Kaname only had thirty minutes to spare before the helicopter came to pick her up on Meridia Island Base. For the first time in their relationship they were alone for a long moment without words; without interruptions, or school, or explosions, or Kaname's _halisen_, or crazy people trying to kidnap her or ask him out.

This was the first time he had ever shown any sort of interest to take her out on a date. Of course, Kaname could think of hundreds of other places he could have taken her, but in a way, this secluded part of the island base had a hundred fold more charm than anything else. For his standards, it was quite impressive. _Not bad, Sousuke_, she thought to herself. This was a relief because Kaname was beginning to think she wasn't at all attractive to him. She was beginning to wonder if his type was more towards someone like Tessa, a slender, willowy girl who was like a princess in Mithril's rank and file. But no, he did not bring Tessa here with him to this spot. He had never brought anyone here. Suddenly, where they were sitting became sacred ground to Kaname. This was a memory that belonged only to them.

_Would it bother you if I said…Even when my mission to protect you is over, I'd still like to stay by your side…?_ Kaname blushed deeply to think of what he had told her when they were in dire straits on the Danaan. _Not at all_, she thought to herself. In fact, it was quite the contrary. Though he had said those words at a time when Kaname was at a crossroads, ready to cast him aside into a turbulent sea on his own because of all the grief he had brought to her, those tender words, the touch of his hand on her bleeding skin, the warmth of his breath against her cheek had led her heart back to him. She was in love with him, and convinced that her eyes would only ever see him as the one she cared for the most for as long as there was light in them.

She never did respond to his inquiry; nor did she tell him how much pleasure his words had brought. He had never been so frank with her. He had never told her how he felt about her, but now she knew that he liked to be by her side, apart from his duty that put him there. Kaname wished that she could be just as frank, just as bold.

_Coward,_ she thought to herself. Even now, their silence was amplified by the crashing waves on the rocks below the sea cliff. Still, she said nothing, but this seemed to be fine with him.

In the past, whenever he did speak, it usually pissed her off somehow. There were moments when Kaname thought she might have died from an aneurism or a heart attack out of frustration but then, there were quiet moments like this of intense thought and feeling, and few words, that made her wish it would last forever. Almost naturally, she scooted closer to him, and leaned her head against his shoulder. His attention turned towards her.

"Are you tired, Chidori?" he asked. Kaname smiled at the thought that Sousuke would probably never stop calling her by her last name.

"Nah," she answered. "Just really relaxed."

"Good," he replied with a satisfied smile. It was the first genuine smile she had ever seen on his face.

After a moment, she asked, "What are you thinking right now, Sousuke?"

"Nothing," he answered. He paused a moment, and continued, "Well, I was thinking of something."

"What?"

"I was thinking that I'd never actually had a moment like this with a girl before."

"Have you ever had one with a _guy_ before?" asked Kaname with a wry smile.

He coughed nervously. "Well, back with my comrades when I was in Afghanistan…."

"Never mind," laughed Kaname. "I really don't care to know. Really, I was only teasing. I guessed that you've never actually sat fishing with a girl, under an orange and pineapple sunlit sky like this one…. I guess this technically counts as a date," she giggled.

"Kyoko will be so disappointed for not having access to this moment with her mini cam," she continued. "When I tell her about my summer trip, I think I'll just omit this part. And the part about almost dying. And also the part where I melded with the advanced AI of a massive nuclear submarine, heh, heh."

_In fact, there isn't much about this trip that I can tell Kyoko…_thought Kaname to herself. No one would even believe her if she did.

"A date…" repeated Sousuke. For a moment, he looked a bit nervous.

Kaname reached over and squeezed his hand. "Don't worry, Sousuke. There aren't any written rules. Just don't pull out a gun and shoot the fish or anything like that. We'll just soak up the sun, and just be content sitting here, OK?"

"Affirmative," he replied. She laughed at his formality.

"I never thought I'd be doing this," she said.

"Doing what?" he asked.

"I don't know how I got to this point, being here, like this, with you. I'm not honest with myself like Tessa."

"I don't understand, Chidori. It took us approximately fifteen minutes to get here together, up the mountain trail due north from the base…."

"No, I was speaking figuratively, Sousuke, not literally. I'm not really good at showing my emotions. A lot of the times I feel like they're a liability," she said.

"This is true. In battle, showing emotions can often lead to the wrong decisions," agreed Sousuke. She clunked him over the head with a fist.

"You're such a military nut, Sousuke. But yeah, it is kind of like that. Showing your emotion means showing your weakness. I promised myself I'd always be strong, especially after…after my mom died." He looked over at her with an expression that was almost like empathy.

_That's right. You've lost people dear to you too, haven't you, Sousuke?_ she thought.

"My dad is currently working with the U.N., and has very little time for me. When my mom was still around, we used to travel everywhere. I've lived in France, Italy and even Argentina before. He pays for everything here, my tuition at the Academy, my rent and my spending cash. I do part-time to pay for video games and stuff he wouldn't approve of, but generally, my dad supports me. But I'm not really close to my father, not now anyway, after she died. And, as you know, my mom's side of the family shuns me like a red-headed step child."

"But your hair isn't—" he began

"It's a figure of speech, silly. They don't like me because I'm the fruit of an unacceptable marriage. My father is very smart and graduated top of his class in University but he comes from a poor family. My mother married him without permission from my grandfather, whom I think used to be very strict. I have no real connections in Japan to speak of, and I might as well be an orphan. A lot of times I wake up feeling that way."

After a silence, Sousuke added, "I am an orphan. I never knew my parents. I think my father was in the military in the JSDF. My mother was a nurse, I think who died before I could remember her. I was raised at an early age by family friends in Afghanistan until their village was burned to the ground and everyone died. The most detailed, earliest memories I possess are of explosions, poverty and guns. I have no idea where I come from, aside from the name my father left me."

"A lot of times, it isn't about where we come from," smiled Kaname. "It's all about what we make of ourselves. That's what really defines who we are."

"Is that why you excel at everything?" asked Sousuke. "Even classical Japanese literature?" She thought she saw him cringe inwardly.

Kaname smiled. "Yeah, that's a part of it. A lot of times, it comes naturally to me. I'm not sure where this talent comes from. Most of the time, I want to prove myself to everyone. Prove to them that I'm okay…on my own. Sometimes, I'm not though." Her voice became smaller. Sousuke looked at her inquisitively, and almost instinctively, he put a hand on her shoulder.

"Especially since I've been targeted by _those_ people." Sousuke felt her suddenly stiffen.

"I'll never let anything happen to you, Chidori. I will protect you," he said simply, staring straight ahead, unwavering, into an uncertain future. His look was so honest and solemn that it forced a smile from Kaname.

"I know you will. And I know that I'm not supposed to tell you, but I think you've figured it out already….I'm a _Whispered_," she said. The word tasted foul on her lips. Sousuke looked at her incredulously as he recognized the word. They had been debriefed by Kalinin about the term. It was the knowledge of the _Whispered_ that gave birth to "Black Technology." To him, it was something only slightly above hocus pocus. But to hear Kaname's confession at that moment made him believe that it was something incredibly profound—something that he could not even begin to fathom.

"But there's something scary about being a _Whispered_," she continued. "I'm afraid of it because it feels endlessly dark; fathoms into a deep unknown. I hear voices sometimes like chanting and sometimes a single voice of an angel or a demon. I'm afraid that if I give in to the voices, I won't come back as myself. When it talks to me, I feel something trying to pull me down into a pool where I'll drown. It's unnatural to have the knowledge that I never learned stored in my head. It's also terribly lonely, because no one else other than the _Whispered _can sympathize or would believe it. Every time it comes over me I fight it in my head. I only dip into the knowledge that I need and then I run away." She sighed and hugged her knees closer to her chest. Her confession was honest and canded. She had never been so frank with him before, and it took him aback. For a moment, he wanted to hold her, comfort her as best he could and tell her that he would be the one to protect her from everything, even herself. But he couldn't find the courage.

"_Coward,_" he thought silently to himself.

"I'm just afraid that if I get caught again, and they try to extract it from me, I'm not gonna be the same afterwards. It almost felt like my mind was being invaded and stripped away with the help of the drug they gave me. It was so scary last time," she sighed.

"That's not going to happen again, Chidori," said Sousuke seriously as he let her lean on him again. He recalled the pale face of a pretty girl in Russia that he rescued from 'experiments' the former KGB were performing on her, who had later hung herself in the snow from a tree to escape from the madness of being a _Whispered_. He could only conclude that there were some like Chidori and the Captain who did not give in to it and others who did not fare so well.

"When you say it, it almost seems true," she said. "I'll depend on you then." A smile crossed his lips again, as if he had taken her words as a compliment.

Kaname added, "But if that time should ever come, and I don't know if I'll make it, Sousuke," she said with a shiver. "Even if you do manage to rescue me again, won't they just try again? If they caught me...what would you do? Would you take them all on? If I started to go insane…would you put me out of my misery?" she asked tentatively. Sousuke looked at her, his eyes questioning what it was she was asking of him.

"You'll make it, Chidori. You're strong like that. That's what I have always admired about you."

"You can be sweet, sometimes, Sousuke—even if you don't realize it. I hope that you'll never be reassigned. I take a lot of pleasure in beating you up for acting like an idiot."

"I know you do," he said, rubbing the top of his head where the latest bruise remained. "I have no objections," he replied.

Kaname laughed a little. "We're such a strange couple."

"Couple?" asked Sousuke.

"Of people," added Kaname shyly. She hoped she wasn't presuming too much, but…_What the hell, go for it_, she thought to herself. Kaname leaned inward and kissed him on the cheek ever so softly. She looked up and almost laughed when she saw the total shock and utter devastation of all of Sousuke's defenses. He had turned bright red. _I guess he's never been kissed like that before_, laughed Kaname inwardly.

"Kaname," whispered Sousuke. Her eyes went wide as her name rolled softly off his tongue. She was so giddy that she fought the urge to hug him tightly and bury her face in his shirt. The way he said her name for the first time made her feel like it was the most beautiful name in the world.

_I want to remember this moment forever_, she thought.

_Stay like this with me forever,_ thought Sousuke.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: They were having an online DVD box set sale for Christmas 2007…hehe. I had almost forgotten my passion for FMP. Nearly one year later, I come back to this story after having read all the Tokyopo releases of the first three novels, and all the way through _Burning One Man Force_ through fan-lations. Subsequently I read part of the next novel as well, which is kind of slow in the beginning. I just know that he has to rescue Kaname from Amalgam, or else he isn't much of a hero, is he? I can't wait for the US release.

But in the end I didn't want to take away from where the author is going with the story. So then I stopped writing. As I revise it now, I realize I didn't want Kaname and Sousuke to get too cozy together, even though I want them to, because it's inconsistent with the novels. But to be consistent with the novels, the writing is restricted. Hmmm…I'm still working out my dilemma of loyalty vs. tale spinning. I just want to write about the unwritten time in between with a little more fluff since their relationship is really understated in the novels.

--Kero (8/14/08)


	2. Good Morning, Musume

Good Morning, _Musume_

"_Ohayo! Kaname-chan! Uuuweeee! Get up, you lazy girl!_" screeched the alarm that Kyouko had especially designed for her. If she didn't turn it off, the alarm would just get louder and louder until the sound of a loud explosion jolted her out of bed. This was a present from Kyoko while they were still in seventh grade at the Academy. Knowing that Kaname had a very difficult time getting out of bed for school in the morning, Kyoko specially requested the clock be made from her parent's company, a leading business in fashionable clocks and creative time pieces. Kyoko, like the many students at the Academy, was from a wealthy background. Others like the class president Hayashimizu were from families tied to the ruling classes. Even the vice president, Ren-san hailed from a very prominent _yakuza_ clan. Some of them were very talented, and most were very spoiled. Others were very bright and had been admitted from public school through scholarship. A very small percentage were just average students whose parents worked very hard to keep them in there so they could benefit from the prestige of having a son or daughter graduate from the Academy and make the right sort of friends and ties that would lead to a positive, lucrative future. Kaname often wondered why her father had asked that she be pulled out of public school at her old hometown to attend the hierarchical Jindai Academy.

Kaname was still rather grumpy this morning. She had recalled a delicious dream of the sunset with Sousuke and blushed slightly at how lovely it made her feel. But the alarm kept screeching at her. She pulled the clock off of the nightstand and cuddled it against her chest while trying to find the off switch. Still in fetal position, Kaname opened her bleary eyes at the sunlight streaming in through her curtains. She must get up. There was no other option. Suzuki sensei was planning a pop quiz in math today, her gut instinct was telling her. Strangely enough her gut was never wrong.

"…_the primary capacitor will trigger the Lamda Driver…the sum of tx² and the P factor can summon the shield of…the sub-interface of…a binary drive system can operate hydraulic actuators for high torque, and promotes precision…volumetric efficiency by increasing the power to weight ratio… with rx² + P divided by…_" she was barely aware of the words floating through her mind in her semi-conscious state.

Kaname, still half asleep, dragged herself into the shower and turned on the water. A spray of cold, then lukewarm, and then warm water forced her eyes open.

"What was I saying…?" she asked no one in particular. Every morning it was as if she was still in a trance until she got herself into the shower. Every morning she felt as thought foreign words were creeping on her tongue and if she did not say them aloud she would go crazy. But by the time she turned off the running water, she could never remember what it was she was trying so hard to say. By the time she exited her apartment and locked the door behind her, Kaname always shrugged it off as a strange, lucid dream—nothing more than a habit of hers.

She looked up at the cloudy sky and wondered if she should have brought an umbrella. There wasn't any time. Picking up the pace, Kaname jogged to the train station to catch the 7:25 a.m. commuter express to school. She couldn't help but yawn as her brain was complaining of the lack of oxygen. A natural athlete, Kaname would have no problem making the mad dash from the station to the school's front gate, as she always did, before it closed at 8:15 a.m. Though, for a girl with low blood pressure in the morning, she should have at least eaten breakfast. This morning in particular, she felt that time was running quickly, and slowing down, like a contracting accordion. It was a particularly odd feeling. Her gut told her that today was going to be an odd day.

She could hear quickened footsteps catch up with her, and then match her pace. Out of habit, she turned around and saw the usual suspect tailing her. Apparently, Sousuke was late this morning as well, mostly likely losing himself in counting his gun collection, or perhaps making sure he carried enough flash grenades in his bag for the day.

"Hurry, Sousuke, or we'll miss the train," she called out behind her.

"Roger," he responded in his usual, stiff fashion.

"Did you remember to bring the math study notes I lent you last week? I have a gut feeling there's a pop quiz today—" she began, but before she could finish, she heard the sound of a running man screeching to a halt. She stopped as well, bringing a hand to her forehead in exasperation—a very common reflex developed and fine-tuned these two years she's known him. She was certain she was developing a permanent mark on her face in the shape of her open palm. Aside from warfare, AS function and operation and strategy games, Sousuke had no more room in his cranium to understand the common life. Or, remember to bring his homework notes to class, for that matter.

"Don't wait for me, Chidori," he called after her, making a sprint for his apartment in the opposite direction. She watched the trail of dust that followed after him.

"'Don't wait for me,' he says," she sighed. "Strangely enough, I find that I just can't leave him. Besides, I need those notes today as well..." A small smile graced her lips. Ever since that moment by the sea, ablaze with the glow of the setting sun, technically their first date, he had refrained from calling her by her first name. In public and in front of people, he only addressed her as 'Chidori.' Kaname wondered if they would have another moment like that again. Sousuke was awfully slow at developing their relationship—if you could call it that—any further. She could feel her feelings plummet in a pit of lamentation.

Still, she couldn't just _leave_ him. She had followed him to Hong Kong just to berate him for leaving her and putting orders before anything, even her, so easily. At that time, she wished she had brought her _halisen_.

There was something very dependable and yet very helpless about him. No, she would not leave him now, or ever.

"CHIDORI!" he called out toward her as he raced back from his apartment. Right on queue, Kaname picked up in a sprint, desperately looking at her watch… 7:23 a.m… There was only two minutes left. Putting her full effort into it, Kaname soon saw the station platform in front of her, the last stragglers about to step inside…

7:24 a.m.

"_The doors will be closing. Please stand away from the platform behind the yellow line," _said the overhead speakers.

"HYPER SPEED!!" she cried out, running even faster, beyond her limits, faster and faster until her hand just crossed the threshold as the doors were closing. The sensors caught the movement and paused, and she pried the doors opened again. Holding the doors with both hands and ignoring the buzzer complaining and telling her to just get in already, she waited for him. She stepped aside just as his head came through the doors and she locked her elbow around a metal pole and pulled him back towards her so he would not collide with the other passengers standing and gawking at them as the doors closed. He was yanked back towards her and inadvertently hung onto her for balance as the train lurched forward towards its next destination.

"Kaname," he huffed breathlessly, "thanks." She suddenly stiffened at the sound of her name on his lips.

"Sousuke," she smiled. _I want to remember every moment when you call me by my name_, she thought to herself. But then, realizing that he was still clinging to her and everyone was still staring at them, her brows furrowed together and she cleared her throat.

"Sousuke, would you mind?" He suddenly realized that one hand was dangerously close to her breast and the other was precariously near her butt. A strained expression crossed his face and he stood up immediately at attention. The train lurched forward again and Kaname gripped the front of his uniform to prevent him from falling over.

"Geez, Sousuke. What would you do without me?" she sighed and rolled her eyes.

"I…don't know, actually," he responded quietly, but honestly. His answer made her pause as she looked at him. He reminded her of a lost puppy in that moment. She loosened her grip and her hand found its way to his sleeve.

"Don't worry. I'll keep an eye on you," she responded and smiled gently.

"I'm counting on it," he responded, reflecting her smile.

It was moments like these that she wondered if she needed to tell him directly what she felt. Was it enough like this? There were many things she wanted to say to him. She wanted to tell him that no matter how frustrating his assignments were, no matter how much trouble his other 'job' gave him, he would never fail to use the Lambda Driver to save himself from a sticky situation because her heart would always be with him when he fought, and she would never stop waiting for him to return. Sousuke was very special in the way that he could pilot Al, a prototype AS with a Black Technology created OS and sophisticated A.I. Mithril was constantly researching how to duplicate the work of Bani, it's _Whispered _creator who killed himself before more could be made, and even if it did it was uncertain as to other pilots could match Sousuke's ability. From what she knew of Al, his OS required a very pure heart to operate the Arbalest. It sounded too much like hocus pocus nonsense, and she couldn't quite explain it to Sousuke, but it was his purity that made him able to operate Al.

Here, on the train to school, it was a world away from that other world that was also a part of him. She wanted to be a part of that world as well so she could always keep an eye on him, but she wasn't sure how. Just to be near him was enough for Kaname.

"_Next stop approaching. Please wait until the train comes to complete stop before moving to the doors. Thank you and have a pleasant day_," said the overhead announcer.

"Time for the last sprint," she said, turning to the door, her face still flushed from their morning exercise, and from his looking at her so intently.

"Ah," he responded behind her. The instant the doors opened, they were off again, like a pair of mad racehorses rushing from the starting gate.

000

When the lunch bell rang after math class, Suzuki sensei's reign of terror was deemed officially over. Her classmates groaned both inwardly and outwardly as Kaname, the class representative, collected their answer sheets. The math problem, a complex equation with more than one unknown, was daunting for most math teachers, let alone high school students. Suzuki sensei had been especially cruel this morning. Kyoko looked as though she was about to cry when Kaname collected her paper so Kaname placed a reassuring hand on her friend's shoulder. Pop quizzes weren't worth many points in the long run, unless you got them all right, which was often Kaname's result.

For whatever reason, her body excelled in athletics, which is why she was on the girl's softball team, and math and science were as easy as eating and breathing to her. She picked up Sousuke's paper and looked at him quizzically as he was staring intently at the paper, as if ready to do battle with it, fists clenched on either side of the sheet. He looked up and handed the paper to her with a triumphant grin. Naturally he did well this time. Kaname's notes had contained a problem almost exactly like the one on the quiz. She almost wanted to say something like, "Stick with me, kid, I'll get you through this," like a corny line from a gangster movie, but she didn't. Kaname often felt sorry for Sousuke, a career soldier since birth practically, who had never really lived in civilized society, aside from the hierarchies of Mithril, as he often stumbled living the rigid routine that was the Japanese institution of learning. Day to day it was an unfamiliar battle for him. But she knew that he tried to fit in as much as he could, not only for his mission of protecting her, but also for himself. Her world was a place he desperately wanted to be a part of, something he felt that he had been missing all this time. She was certain of it.

_You and I are so similar, Sousuke,_ she thought as she continued to collect the remainder of the quiz papers. _We both could be content being very normal, unexceptional people. Unfortunately for us, we're both very unique and in high demand…_

"Chidori-kun," said Suzuki sensei. "Could you turn those papers in to the teacher's lounge and put them on my desk for me?"

"Yes, sensei," she responded dutifully.

"I'll meet you in the cafeteria with the others?" asked Kyoko.

"Sure," responded Kaname. She wondered if Sousuke would be on the roof again, figuring out perfect sniper locations, or perhaps counting his rubber bullets, or maybe testing his taser charge on some unsuspecting passer-by. The more she thought about it, the more she made her usual conclusion that Sousuke should probably be guarded from the general school population. There was no one else who could do it but her.

"Eat with us, Sousuke," she said before walking towards the door.

"Roger," he responded. Kaname couldn't help but smirk at his response.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: The prologue and the first chapter were written about several years (4?) apart. After watching FMP for the first time I wrote that prologue to reflect the things that were not said at the end of the first series. Then I discovered (and bought) the comic, then I watched FMP Fumoffu and finally, I found a bootleg version of FMP The Second Raid in 2005 and I've wanted to tell a story about what I thought the _Whispered _were. (I subseuently purchased the real thing! Support anime!) I just feel that there's more to tell with Leonardo Testarossa and Kaname's parents.

Fortunately, or unfortunately, I had to can the original first chapter I had written so long ago (which contained a very shoujo lovey-dovey scene of our hero and heroine by a campfire—sigh) and somehow it turned into the morning train scene, hehe. Don't really know how that happened, but I wanted to stay true to the comic, Fumoffu, and TSR all at the same time. So much to tell, so little time. I realize this chapter doesn't go anywhere. Love me or flame me, I don't care which.

--Kero (9/14/07)


	3. Oh My Goddess

Oh My Goddess

Kaname absently listened to the sound of the activity on school grounds through the open hall windows as she made her way to the teacher's lounge on the fourth floor. Outside on lunch break, students were eating their bento lunches under the trees, chatting happily on benches and on the grass outside. Others were using the time to have preliminary school club meetings, including the Student Council. Ren-san and Hayashimizu-kun would be there now. Students were also chatting in the classrooms she passed, eating their bento boxes indoors with their desks turned to face one another. She could only imagine the melee down by the bread and sandwich counter where on a daily basis, those students who didn't bring lunch or forgot to bring it, and the 'commoners' who didn't have the money for the daily lunch program, had to fight the massive mosh pit that was the line to the counter and avoid being stampeded while buying a quick, tasty and cheap snack. Most students however opted out of that frantic scene and paid their way into the cafeteria and it's gourmet lunches and lattés.

Her soft, rubber soled school shoes made a slight squeaking noise as she turned the corner to the strip of covered walkway that connected the east and north wings on the building. Kaname stopped short when she noticed a young man with platinum blonde hair, almost to the point of being white, standing before her, leaning against the wall. The sudden sight of him after so many months startled her and for a moment her brain couldn't register where she had seen him before.

"Hello…my goddess," smiled Leonard. His voice was warm and alluring but the cocky grin on his face made Kaname loathe him even more. After all, this was the man who had _stolen_ her first kiss from her on that dark, fateful night. It was still a very touchy subject for her.

"What are you doing here?" asked Kaname in an unaffected voice.

"Can't I visit the the girl who haunts my dreams during the day?" he asked playfully. His method of flirting was even more annoying that Kurtz Weber's. At least Kurz was harmless.

"No," she responded simply and took a step sideways to go around him. But he stepped in front of her quickly, and taking one of her hands and placing his other hand on her hip he pulled her around as if dancing with her. Kaname lost her grip of the quiz papers to steady herself and the pile slipped out of her hands and splayed out onto the floor in every direction at their feet. Stepping on them as he whirled her around again, he pressed her against the window and leaned into her.

"Shall I take up where I left off that night, Kaname-san?" he asked.

"I'll scream before you make another move," she responded. Her face was hot with anger and annoyance but she was also frightened. Where was Sousuke?

"Is that all I can expect from you, Kaname-san?" His fingers touched the softness of her cheek. "And here I was going to take you under the fold of my wing and tell you all about us…the _Whispered_." Kaname's eyes went wide. It suddenly made sense to her that Gauron may have been a freelance terrorist who then made himself useful to Leonard's organization Amalgam when she met him. Or perhaps Amalgam had always been pulling the strings since the very beginning? If they were as well funded as Mithril, it could explain how her information was leaked out and she became a hunted _Whispered_. After all, Mithril was still an organization of mercenaries, despite the fact that they mostly stood on the side of justice and conscience. But whatever Mithril was, Kaname was sure that Amalgam was the exact opposite in both means and ends. If Kaname wasn't what they expected, they would toss her aside and kill her. Leonard was nothing like his younger sibling, Teletha.

In the end, it had always been Amalgam that wanted her. Leonard looked like the type who obtained whatever he wanted and he had some powerful friends to back him. If that was the case, could Mithril continue to protect her? The sudden thought of having her world pulled out from under her feet again was very objectionable to Kaname. Would it never end?

"Let me help you understand your full potential, Kaname-san," said Leonard leaning in to kiss her. Suddenly a mechanical pencil came flying between them, and Leonard stepped back away from Kaname to avoid it. The tip of the pencil grazed his cheek, causing a thin red line on his porcelain skin. He shot a menacing glare back at Sousuke, who had his gun at the ready.

"Your knight has appeared. Alas, it seems our conversation must end here, my goddess. But consider my proposal. Your talents are wasted among these commoners in these common halls. There is no right or wrong. There is only knowledge. In the end, won't Mithril just ask the same thing of you? Just remember that I asked first." He blew her a kiss, stepped back, and then leaped through an open window of the walkway. Kaname rushed over to where he had jumped over. In a strong gust of upward force that tossed up both her hair and her skirt and almost made Kaname stumble backward, Leonard, carried by one of his personal miniature Armed Slaves camouflaged in ECM mode, jumped straight up towards the roof and then disappeared over it. She then heard Sousuke's footsteps rush over to her.

"Chidori! Are you all right?" he asked. She could not find her voice or meet his eyes and only nodded in response. Before he could head towards the stairs, however, her hand clutched at his jacket hem.

"Chidori?" he asked questioningly.

"Don't…You won't catch him. Please…" she whispered leaning onto his back. "Don't leave me," she said in a tiny voice. She couldn't quell her uneasiness or her trembling. Kaname knew that if he wanted, Leonard could simply take her by force and she would never see Sousuke again.

"Chidori," he responded, collecting her trembling form into his arms and holding her close. He wanted to tell her there was nothing to fear, that he was here to protect her, but somehow, he could not find the words. As he stared blankly at the trampled quiz papers littered on the floor, he knew that she was being targeted again by a very powerful enemy and their peaceful existence together was now, again, disrupted.

000

Kaname stared at the wind chime hanging outside on her patio. Though her patio door was shut, through the glass she could hear the delicate pinging of the ceramic chip striking against the round chime, painted in autumn colors to match the season, as the wind picked up. Behind her, scattered across her coffee table were various weapons of shapes, sizes and abilities that Sousuke had laid out for her. Even now, she could hear his voice in her head, prattling away at the specs and scope of each, but she wasn't really listening.

"Back then," she interrupted, "when you left me, a lot of things happened. I actually used the taser you gave me after I had lured some old guy to a love motel." She heard Sousuke drop whatever it was he was holding in his hand as it made a soft 'thud' against her carpeted floor.

"You told me you had a back up watching me. But I needed to lure that person out to find you…so I did something reckless," she said quietly.

"Chidori," he said in a small voice. "Were you hurt?"

"No, not really. After I handcuffed the old guy to the shower I managed to corner Ami-chan."

"_Ami-chan_?" he asked.

"That's the name your backup gave me. That's what I call her. I don't know if that's her real name. An assassin interrupted us on that rainy rooftop and Ami was incapacitated. She explained to me later that Gauron sent the girl. The assassin wasn't very much older than you or me. I hesitated, but I remember what you told me," she smiled.

"About the lion licking its lips before its prey," said Sousuke.

"Exactly. I just wanted to stay alive." Again, the wind chime's song was picked up by the wind outside. "I just wanted…to see you again. And that's when I met the devil in a white suit. He had been watching me as well. He killed the assassin and told me that he loved me."

"That guy on campus today?" he asked stiffly.

"Yes. Leonard Testarossa…" she sighed.

"Testa--?! he exclaimed.

"Exactly. It seems that brother and sister play for opposite teams. He's also a _Whispered._ That miniature AS model that helped him escape was of his own design. I have a feeling that they're even more sophisticated than Al. Maybe it's because Bani never finished Al…"

"Chidori, how--?"

"How do I know all this? He told me in my mind. The _Whispered_ have that ability to speak with one another and through one another. He resonated with me for a second before he…" her voice trailed away and her hand inadvertently touched her lips. She could not face Sousuke at that moment. Before she realized it, he was next to her, looking at her intently and searching her eyes for something akin to mutual comfort.

"He kissed me," she said finally. "I had never felt so helpless in my life. I slapped him and I wanted to take a shower, even though I was totally soaked, standing there nearly naked like an idiot in the rain. I cried like a baby for a really long time as Ami watched. For a moment today, before you came, I felt just as miserable and helpless again." She could feel his breath against her cheek. The sensation brought her back to reality and she turned to look at him. In that same moment, he slowly leaned in to touch her lips with his own, but paused, as if requesting permission. Kaname moved toward him and closed her eyes, letting him kiss her. Chaste but sweet, the kiss left her wanting more.

"I don't want you to think about him any more," he said with determination, and at the moment it almost sounded like an order. "I don't want you crying anymore; it's not like you. I will be the one to protect you."

"Leonard seems like the type who gets whatever he wants," she pointed out.

"Do you trust me?" he asked. The question took her by surprise.

"What?" she asked back. It was the same tone of voice he had used when he saved her after the plane hijacking near North Korea.

"Do you trust me?" he asked again. The look in his eyes was pure and honest. She realized that she loved him for it.

"Yes," she answered without further hesitation. "Like I said that day I gave you a haircut, you're the only person I truly trust." Kaname wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face in his chest. She inhaled his scent deeply and breathed out slowly to relax herself.

"Do you want to stay with me tonight?" he asked. Kaname suddenly stood back and held him at arm's length.

"W-what? Why s-so sudden? I don't think I can…sleep with…" her voice trailed off as her face started showing signs of overheating.

Sousuke coughed nervously. "So I can protect you," he added. "Most of my gear is in my apartment, and I think it would be more convenient if you stayed with me for a while, until we've established the level of danger you're in."

"Oh," she responded. "O-of course."

Immediately thereafter, Kaname gathered her necessities in a duffel and packed her uniform and school bag separately. She made Sousuke carry what was left in her refrigerator in a tote since she was almost certain that his refrigerator was empty. Kaname was not about to eat army rations and energy bars for dinner.

Always the gentleman, Sousuke let her have his bed and cleared the equipment out of his bedroom to give her more space. Surprisingly, Kaname marveled that Sousuke lived very neatly, despite being a guy, but she guessed that it was his no nonsense military training that explained this behavior. She cooked a stir-fry medley of vegetables and chicken with rice for them both. No surprisingly, Sousuke's taste buds had been dulled with military living and he always complimented her cooking, no matter what she made for him and ate it with gusto.

As he cleaned up the kitchen and tidied up the table Kaname had the strange sense that they were behaving like a married couple. She blushed at the thought of being his wife. Tessa would have some serious objections to that, but the thought wasn't unpleasant to Kaname. She contemplated this while she was in the shower, while she was blow-drying her hair and while she was brushing her teeth. Kaname wondered when, if ever, she could live a peaceful life with Sousuke. Most likely, his job would prohibit this, and her status as a _Whispered_ meant that an uncertain future was before her. As a side thought, she wondered if her father would be furious to know that she was spending the night with a guy…sort of.

After she came out of the shower she noticed he was typing his report to his superiors. Most likely, he was telling him of what she had told him of Amalgam. Tessa might find it fit to hide them both on Meridia Island. Whatever was in store for her, Kaname knew that tomorrow would be the first step toward beginning of it all. The enemy had shown its face and she had a feeling they weren't going to pull any punches. She pushed back the curtain from his window and stared outside at the city lights. They looked a little lonely tonight, somehow. Kaname turned and saw Sousuke wordlessly staring at her from the doorway. His soundless way of moving never failed to catch her by surprise.

"W-what?" she asked.

"Back where I grew up in Helmajistan, there was a fairy tale about a goddess bathed in moonlight. Right now, you remind me of that fairy tale," he said. Sousuke closed the curtain again, and then stepped away to pull out his gun and undo the holster and sat down on the floor. As he started to unbutton his shirt, Kaname stared at him blankly. She didn't know what she would have done if he had not been wearing an undershirt.

"W-what are you doing?" she stammered.

"I'm going to bed, of course," he responded, taking off his shoes and socks.

"But, you let me have the bed," she answered.

"Affirmative," he replied, laying flat onto the floor and rolling under the bed frame. "I sleep on the floor." Kaname watched speechlessly as his hand reached out from the darkness and pulled his gun under the bed without a sound.

"Do you _always_ sleep on the floor?" she asked incredulously.

"It's more convenient in case of ambush. But…I guess I'm used to it. I've never slept on a mattress before. I think it would be uncomfortable for me."

Kaname sighed. "You were raised like a savage." She turned off the lights and crawled into bed. After a little while, Kaname found herself still wide awake, not used to the idea of Sousuke lying underneath her.

"S-Sousuke?" she whispered. "Are you asleep?"

"Negative," responded the voice from under the bed. Kaname rolled over on her side and reached down toward the floor with one hand. Without a word, his hand came out to meet hers, letting their fingertips touch. Kaname wondered when she had become so dependent on him, since it seemed a little out of character for her. But regardless, the feel of him lulled her thoughts into a gentle sleep where the ocean, a sunset and Sousuke waited for her once more.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: What did you think? Too smoochy-smoochy? HAHAHAHA...sorry. Kaname and Sousuke are among my favorite anime couples. OK, it's me we're talking about here, so smoochy-smoochy scenes are inevitable. I realize that the author Shoji Gatoh has already written this far into to the story in his novel of the FMP universe "Continuing on My Own," but let's just say some people can't wait until it's published in English. So here's my spin on what happens in between the novel "The End of Day by Day" and after "Dancing Very Merry Christmas."

--Kero (9/18/07)


	4. The Devil Does Exist

The Devil Does Exist

Kaname found herself alone in a dark world of eternal night. Overhead a blood red moon hung precariously in the sky as its only visible ornament. How long this place had remained this way Kaname couldn't tell, but in the distance, Kaname thought she could make out the faint, gray shapes of fallen towers, buildings and bridges. The architecture wasn't recognizable by Kaname immediately, since the pieces were nothing like she had ever seen in her world, despite the fact that she had traveled much with her parents when she was young, but still it was familiar.

Then she heard it. Faintly at first, but then more clear, all around her in the shadows there were voices whispering. Kaname could only hear nonsense words at first but as she listened closer she became afraid.

**You're a monster, reborn…with the ability to destroy your world and turn it into the wasteland you see before you. You will lead them all to destroy the world. You were born with destruction in your heart…you will succumb to me eventually…Once I am released only ruin and devastation will remain…**

_Stop it,_ thought Kaname. Fear clutched her heart as cold, invisible hands wrapped themselves around her body.

_Leave me alone!_

**It doesn't matter whose side you're on since the end result is always the same. The so-called do-gooders and the so-called evil-doers will all want to use us…in the end, you will succumb when they destroy everything you love, everything you hold dear, in their constant struggle for our knowledge…you will disappear…**

_No! I want to live! Stop it, please!_ Kaname tried to cry out, but found she had no voice.

**We will become one with the others…when you die, I will be free…so die…**The cold hands reached around her throat and started to squeeze.

_No!_ she tried to shout as she gasped for air. Her vision started to blur and all she could hear was insane laughter and the whispers all around her growing louder with each second of her struggle. _Sousuke, help me! _she thought.

Kaname opened her eyes to an unfamiliar ceiling. This was not her room. Her eyes looked left, then right, trying to assess the situation. Four barren walls stared back at her. Was she dead? If so, why was there a strange pressure on her chest? If she were dead, she wouldn't be able to feel anything, right? Kaname blinked again and realized that tears were flowing down to her temples. She could feel the wetness in her hair against the morning air. Kaname couldn't remember when she had ever felt so miserable in the morning.

"Are you awake?" said a voice next to her. She turned her head to the right and saw Sousuke looking back at her. As usual, her low blood pressure and grogginess in the morning inhibited her ability to immediately grasp her situation. His arms and legs were wrapped around her as if to hold her securely in place. Gradually Kaname could feel the heat rising to her face and extending all the way to her toes as she felt the length of his body pressed against her.

"Sousuke, you idiot! What are you doing in bed with me?" she demanded as she struggled free of his grip. In her awkward shifting of position, she realized that there was very little room to maneuver on a single mattress and immediately lost her balance as her top half slid over the edge. But before her head could impact with the wooden floor a strong hand gripped her arm to keep her in place, teetering between getting back on the mattress and falling off of it.

"You were struggling and talking in your sleep. It carried on for most of the night and I was afraid you were going to hurt yourself so I thought I would…hold you in place, since I wasn't able to awaken you," he responded rather shyly. Sousuke let her down slowly off the bed until she was sitting on the floor.

"I talk in my sleep?" she asked. No one had ever told her that before. Of course, this was the first time she had spent the night with someone since her mother died three years ago. Of course, this was the first time she had spent the night with a..._man_.

"You were calling out my name…" he added somewhat uncomfortably. Kaname's face flushed a hue of fluorescent pink.

"Are you feeling all right, Kaname?" he asked, rather concerned. He reached over and felt her forehead. She flinched at the familiarity of his touch.

"In the night, I heard you saying things that I barely understood myself," he continued, sitting up on the bed. "You were talking about the Tuatha de Danaan, and you were talking about the Lambda Driver. Your words should not be common knowledge to the average civilian."

"It's knowledge I was born with," said Kaname thinking back to when she was kidnapped in North Korea. "That's what that woman said to me. The Whispered are all born with a particular piece of knowledge. From what I can understand from Tessa, the knowledge existing in each of us is like pieces of a map. No two _Whispered _are alike but the knowledge can build on one another. I seem to know about the technology flowing through the Danaan, like when Tessa asked me to control it through the Lady Chapel with my mind. I knew how to operate her even before Tessa resonated with me. I also seem to know about the Lambda Driver, and the basic concepts behind the Arbalest. I'm just afraid…" she paused. "I'm afraid of what other information I know, without ever having learned." Kaname took a deep breath and sighed. "I always wake up and begin the day like that. But this time, I had a really awful dream—like something was trying to take me over."

He made no response. In fact, he didn't move towards her as he was trying to assess the information she was giving him and strategize the next move.

"It's dangerous, don't you think, Sousuke? The information in my head is unnatural…it shouldn't be there. And it's so advanced…as if it's not of our world," she said quietly. The sound of her own voice in the quiet room was beginning to frighten her. The Whispered were cursed children, and the more one spoke of them, the darker the curse became.

"And Leonard knows about your potential," he concluded. "Before I killed him for the last time, Gauron told me about the Whispered and Amalgam. He told me that they wanted you, but to what end, I'm not certain." He got up and checked outside of his window by peering through a break in the curtain without disturbing it. Sousuke holstered his gun and went around the bed to offer her his hand. She took it and he pulled her up off the floor.

"All I know is that I'm going to protect you, until it's all over. Until you get your life back the way you want it, I'm not going to rest. I will protect you," he declared simply. Kaname was a little astonished by his open sincerity.

"Sousuke," she began.

"Why don't you get ready for school? I'm going to finish my report to Mithril," he said, heading for the door.

"Would you like me to pack you a bento?" she asked. He paused and his expression was so amusing to her she started to laugh. _It's a simple question, Sousuke. It's not as though I just asked you to marry me,_ she thought. Though, the thought was not unappealing to Kaname.

"I'll take that as a 'yes,'" she smiled.

"I'd appreciate it," was his response before he left the room.

Kaname showered and put on her Academy uniform as she had done for years. The only change in her routine today was that she was living in Sousuke's apartment. Kaname blushed at the thought as she tied the usual ribbon in her hair. Checking her appearance in the mirror once more before she reached for the doorknob, she paused. Someone was calling her. Kaname went to the window and peeked outside without really moving the curtains. The street was empty, aside from the local garbage collector and a group of old ladies around the trash bin talking their usual morning gossip. But she was certain that _he_ was calling her. Kaname closed her eyes and allowed Leonard to resonate with her for a second.

_How kind of you to let me in, Kaname-san,_ he said gently.

_What do you want?_ she asked hastily.

_I only want a moment with you. I want you to weigh your options before deciding where you stand_, he responded. _Come outside._

_How do I know this isn't a trap?_ she asked.

_Just make sure that your knight doesn't follow you. I can't guarantee his safety. _His voice trailed off and disappeared.

Kaname snuck out of the building into the sunlight. The trash man was gone, as were the old ladies out front. She saw the familiar figure in white, the devil in a tailored suit, standing in the shade of a willow tree.

"I'm here," Kaname announced.

"So I see," he responded with a smile.

"What is it you wanted to tell me?" she asked.

"What is it you wanted me to say?" he reciprocated playfully.

"Don't toy with me, you rude little snot," retorted Kaname. "You're the one who called _me_ out."

"Forgive me, Kaname-san. I couldn't resist the urge to play with you. But, that aside, I want you to come to us, willingly. That would spare us the trouble of taking you by force," he said simply.

"Why on earth would I want to side with people who would say such things to me?" she asked.

"Because it's your destiny. Mithril is a pointless organization. I don't know why my sister stands behind it so staunchly. But they just want you to remain as you are, without exercising your full potential—without achieving that destiny that was laid out for you even before you were born," responded Leonard.

"I'd like to choose my own destiny, thank you," said Kaname curtly.

"Unfortunately, that's not for the Whispered to decide. We are drawn to one another no matter what we do, where we go. In the end, we can choose to live stepping on the sacrifices of those we hold dear, or we can choose to die. To be a Whispered is to be isolated and alone. Whether you like it or not, everything you hold dear; your school, your friends, your life, your family, your knight…will all wither, die or go up in flames if you refuse us."

"Why can't Amalgam just leave me alone?" asked Kaname, almost pleading with him in her frustration.

"I'm afraid that's not possible. You are the last of Amalgam's leads. But we have a feeling that your knowledge surpasses that of any Whispered discovered thus far. When all the pieces are put together, I believe that the illusionist's veil that covers our secret knowledge will be lifted. But I think you'll want to come with me willingly, regardless," he said gently.

"Why would I consider doing such a thing?"

"So I can tell you all about your abilities, how to utilize it and overcome your fear. So you can take your place among the ruling class of the world. You've never belonged down here with everyone else. Mithril won't be able to save you and in the end, your knight will die trying to protect you."

Kaname froze. Her heart began to shudder. She suddenly found it difficult to breathe. Thought it was hard to believe anything could put down the invincible man who was Sagara Sousuke, when Leonard said it, it almost felt true. Could she live a life without Sousuke so she could save him? Was he better off without her? Doubt clouded her heart.

"Come with me, Kaname. I will tell you everything there is to know about us," he smiled as he extended his hand to her. His platinum blonde locks was lifted by a strong gust of wind. The branches of the willow tree swayed and the leaves trembled. "Your knight cannot protect you from who you are. But I can teach you how to become a god in the new world order."

In that moment, as Kaname's thoughts hovered in uncertainty, Sousuke picked up his ringing cell phone. The number on the caller ID was unfamiliar to him. Only Mithril agents and Kaname should have this number.

"Yes?" he answered cautiously.

"What the hell kind of bodyguard are you?" asked an unfeeling voice masked with an electronic device. Sousuke recognized it as the "watcher" Mithril sent with Sousuke, to keep an eye on Kaname from the shadows as Soususke was the front man. It was hard to believe that this gruff voice and personality belonged to one Kaname since recognized as "Ami-chan."

"What--?" asked Sousuke, but before he finished his question he turned immediately to where Kaname should have been but wasn't. The room was silent and the front door was open. Panic started to bubble up in his chest, despite the fact that he was supposed to be a "pro." Instinctively, his hand went to his weapon and he chambered a bullet.

"The angel and the devil are conversing outside your building," said Ami-chan before she hung up abruptly. Normally, the other agent was supposed to watch and act only if Kaname's life was in danger, but this time, she had actually gone out of her way to say something to warn him. Unknown to Kaname, Ami-chan actually had quite an affinity towards her after their last adventure together.

"Shit," swore Sousuke under his breath. He ran out the door and descended the stairs to the front lobby and nearly collided with a neighbor before he rammed his body into the front glass door and stumbled into the sunlight.

Then he saw them. Kaname, in full uniform, staring at the young man Sousuke had seen yesterday as the wind began to pick up. His whitish blonde hair trailed gracefully to the side as did Kaname's long, dark locks. Leonard extended a hand towards her and in that moment Sousuke saw them, Kaname's hand moved to take what was being offered.

"Chidori!" Sousuke yelled. Her hand stopped and she snapped back to attention and turned towards him. Sousuke had no idea what they had been conversing about but he felt that if she took Leonard's hand she would never return.

He thought he saw her lips mouth his name but starting from that moment the world went silent. All he could hear was the sound of his breath and pounding heart as he raced over to where she was. His hands took aim at Leonard and Sousuke pulled the trigger. Shockingly, the bullets seemed to stop in mid air before reaching their destination and instead, fell to the ground harmlessly. Two human sized machines, what Kaname had described as "intelligent AS's" suddenly materialized in front of him, stopping him in his tracks. Before he could further assess the situation he felt and intense heat and pressure charging towards him. For a moment, he thought his eardrums were either melting or popping or both, and then his body spiraled backwards in the same direction he had come. As he was rendered helpless in midair he could just make out Kaname's figure being swept up by the other AS and disappearing with gleaming white Leonard in a single leap toward the sky before it all went black.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Alas! I can't write it the way Gatou-san writes it! (Kero bows down in fealty in front of her Shoji Gatou shrine). I spent my lunch hour at the bookstore today pouring through the first chapters of the recently released 1st FMP novel "Fighting Boy Meets Girl," and I was so impressed. It's like a thinking person's FMP! Don't get me wrong, I love all the gag jokes in the series, especially in Fumoffu, but there is subtlety in the novel you don't get in the anime. I checked the publisher's website and indeed, there are many, many (18?) novels we haven't read yet, people…man I wish I was literate in Japanese…. My recent discovery may result in me cutting this story short. Yeah, I know that Sousuke doesn't really call her by her first name, but it would be nice, don't you think? --Kero (9/18/07)


	5. My Hime

My _Hime_

"Urzu 6, Urzu 7, are you two in position?" asked the usually calm and collected voice of Melissa Mao over the com-link.

"_Hai, Mao-neesan,_" crooned Kurtz' voice playfully.

"_Kurtz, you bastard, stop fooling around_," reprimanded Mao and Bel simultaneously. The four-person reconnaissance and retrieval team was just small enough to continue unseen, just out of reach of the estate's scans and sensors.

"_Urzu 7, approaching the back wall of the estate now, awaiting further instruction._"

"_Good_," said Bel's voice. "_ECM detection on specs, everyone. ECS switch to 'on.' Urzu 7, assess the position of the enemy and the Astrals that will likely be guarding him. Locate Angel's location, and report directly before engaging."_

"_Roger," _responded Sousuke. Even in the calm fading daylight, he could feel the sweat collect on his brow. _She_ was somewhere in here, and he was determined to retrieve her.

"_Urzu 7_," said Mao's voice, almost reproaching, "_Stay focused. We'll get her back._" It was as if Mao had already anticipated Sousuke's next reckless move before he even thought of it, just like when they were in Hong Kong, since it was Kaname that was involved in their mission this time.

"_Roger_," was his only reply. He wondered how hollow a response that would actually turn out to be. In ordinary situations, yes, he was a trained professional. But when it concerned the person he cared about the most, he often had tendencies to act very irrationally.

_**Are you worried about Miss Chidori?**_ asked the male, mechanical voice of his AX-7's A.I. in a different com channel in his head set.

"That's none of your concern," responded Sousuke stiffly. "Shut up until I tell you."

_**Roger.**_

000

Kaname looked up into the pink and yellow sky sprawled out before her and glowing so unabashedly. The sound of the waves below was not at all comforting to her. For whatever reason, the words "shameless beauty" came to mind. The sun would set soon. The scenery was a little reminiscent of another sunset, not so long ago. But this was a different place—a place that held no meaning for her. She felt a cold hand grip her heart and lamented at the feeling of loneliness that threatened to consume her. The hem of her blue tailored dress and its ribbons picked up in the cool breeze.

"Just like a princess in a castle," smiled the man walking up behind her. She turned to shoot an unfeeling glance in his direction, and then continued her silent reverie as if she had never heard him.

"I don't like to be ignored, Kaname-san," he smiled as he leaned over the railing. His platinum locks shone immaculately as usual, in the dying light. "One would think that you'd at least speak to me after bringing you here to my estate in the south of France. Especially since I've treated you so nicely and wasted no expense to spoil you. That dress looks ravishing on you, by the way."

"I didn't ask for any of it," retorted Kaname. Still, she had offered no resistance with the Astral had scooped her up and whisked her away. The sight of Sousuke's confused and shocked expression still played like an image on freeze frame in her mind, with an ample heaping of guilt. _After all you've done for me, fighting so fearlessly…and still, I…_she thought.

There had been no hesitation from her when Leonard called her out. Why had that been? Even now, the sight of him disgusted her. Kaname turned to be anywhere but this close to him.

"Excuse me," she said icily. But before she could take another step, he caught her by the hand and spun her around, as if in beat with some tango, and when she lost her balance, he gracefully dipped her low. As they remained in that pose, somewhat ridiculously in her opinion, he leaned in to kiss her. An immediate reaction was an open palm headed directly towards his face. Leonard caught her assault in time, and let her up with a playful smile and a wagging finger.

"This will not do, Kaname-san. Are you still angry about our first kiss?" he asked innocently.

"I will _never_ forgive you for that," said Kaname, almost growling.

"So…let me guess. You're saving yourself up for what was his name? Sergeant Sagara was it? How droll," he chuckled. Almost abruptly, the smile on his face came so close to her that it almost made her take a step back.

"I can show you and teach you more beautiful things, Kaname, things more mentally stimulating than hand grenades, rifles and Calorie Mates." He was dangerously close to her now. _I can show you how to dip into your true powers, and how to control your knowledge. Who knows what secrets lie in that pretty head of yours? Perhaps a discovery even bigger than the A-bomb in its time?_

The last words were said directly into her mind through resonance. Kaname pulled away and closed off her mind to him.

"Ah, you've created a barrier. That's clever," he remarked. "Can't you open yourself up to me? I can give you a world without fear, a world in your own hands."

"You mean, through Amalgam?" she retorted. "You're just a puppet in their hands. What could you possibly offer me that would be tempting?"

"I am no more a puppet of Amalgam than your sergeant is of Mithril," he shrugged. "It's a symbiotic relationship you see. I need a base of operations that can fund and develop my 'work.' He needs a base of operations to live the only way he's ever known—through fighting. You were unsuccessful, Kaname-san, in trying to convert him into your peaceful world. Like a square peg in a circular slot, he will never fit."

"That's because you don't know him," said Kaname coolly. "He's adaptable."

"But why waste your time on the likes of him—" Leonard continued.

"He's worth it," interrupted Kaname. "He's a good person, underneath it all. He struggles but he _tries anyway._ He's strong, but kind—a person who protects. But you and Amalgam, you only work to create turmoil and struggle and strife in the world—you only destroy. You stand for everything that I am against. Your kind ruins worlds like mine. Just by playing a few tunes and stringing a few puppets you create cold war after cold war, in the name of profit, promoting fear as a commodity. I detest you and your kind," said Kaname roughly.

"And yet you did not struggle when I brought you here," he marveled.

"That was a mistake on my part. I was lured by your fake promises uttered on your forked tongue. I realize now that your seduction was aimed at only attaining what's in here," she said, pointing to her temple. "Your so-called 'love' for me is without meaning."

"I, unlike some other useless gun-toting freak am at least capable of expressing myself honestly," he sighed. "Do you think the Sergeant loves you? Or is he merely attracted to the world you live in? A world he didn't know even existed? A place he might now have grown fond enough of to call 'home?' He's originally from Japan, like you, isn't he? He must have been amazed the first time he saw Tokyo, a place that had remained peaceful for decades now. You know, that place can remain, as it is, for as long as you want it, Kaname-san. He will not be harmed if that is your wish. We will of course have to get rid of the prototype AX-7, the annoying thorn in our side. But I can give orders to spare him, if you'd like."

"Are you trying to threaten me?" she asked.

"Just be sure that I always get what I want. Amalgam, unlike Mithril, is concerned with ends, not the means," he said almost wistfully. "We haven't tried it before, but it might be interesting," he smiled.

"What?" she asked.

"World domination," responded playfully.

"You're mad," she retorted.

"Admit it," he laughed. "There's a certain charm to it, right? We the _Whispered_ are so much further advanced than the typical Homo Sapiens. What are we? Who knows? We are higher beings, alien to this world of morons and idiots. We understand the pure languages of math and science like we understand eating and breathing. Think about it. We were meant to control it all."

"But where do we come from?" asked Kaname, almost rhetorically. She couldn't believe she was grouping herself with him in the same word, "we."

"From Fate, Kaname-san. From Angels and Demons," he stated simply with a frivolous smile that puzzled her exceedingly. What was he spouting off about?

"You can't be serious…" she began. Somehow, she thought that was a fitting description of what they were, though. Something closer to a monster than a human. The whispers in her head were both alluring and sinister. This would always separate her from the rest of the population. She would always be different, always be alone. If she listened to the voices in her head long enough, they would convince her to give up all attachment to this world, to no longer be herself. Would she want to hear the rest of Leonard's description of what she was? Would she be able to continue on as she had with the knowledge? No, she was afraid of what she was…Now that she had come all this way, she didn't want to know after all.

"You don't need to fear it," he said, as if reading her emotions on her face. "Embrace who you are, Kaname-san. Use it. Build flying fortresses, mechanical shields and what not to protect that which you love. Amalgam will fund it. Your imagination is the limit," he said with a grand gesture, as if to embrace the sky with his arms.

"I don't want to," she said quietly. "I don't have such lofty ideals like you do. I only want to continue the life of a normal girl, in a normal peaceful world, with my friends and family...with _him_. Why can't you just let me be?" she asked, almost pleading.

"I'm afraid we can't do that," he shook his head gently. "The knowledge in you will be extracted whether you like it or not. We need it because we are all different. If you do it willingly, I can tell you how to control it, and it won't hurt as much as when it's taken by force. We've lost too many of our kind that way."

"You're all monsters," she said quietly, looking again in the direction of the setting sun. Somewhere, far away in that direction, was the home she longed for and the boy she left behind.

Suddenly, Kaname and Leonard were surrounded by Astrals. Their slitted eyes glared menacingly crimson. A muffled voice spoke in Leonard's coat pocket.

"Mr. Silver. The estate's security has been breached."

"As expected," marveled Leonard. "You can come out now, Sergeant. I know you've been eavesdropping on us quite rudely for some time now," he called out. Surprised Kaname turned to see a familiar slender figure fall gracefully out of a tree, like a skilled acrobat falling gently to a crouched position on the grass.

"Sousuke," Kaname called out.

"Chidori," he said in his usual, formal tone. "Are you hurt?" Sousuke completely ignored Leonard's presence. She shook her head. He _had_ come for her, as she hoped. In the traditional fairy tale the prince always comes for his princess…but can she have the fairy tale ending as well, or was it too much to ask? Grim thoughts began to flood her mind. The image of Sousuke, on the floor in a pool of his own blood flashed across her consciousness.

**He will fight to the death for you…is that what you want?** said the voice in her head. She quickly quelled her thoughts and rubbed her temples to dissipate the headache she felt coming on. _This is no good_, she thought to herself. _The voices visions are assaulting me when I'm awake with more frequency. I don't want to give in. _Kaname forced her mind back to the scene in front of her, where the two young men were still glaring at one another.

"It's rude to ignore people," sighed Leonard, waving an arm to his Astrals to engage the enemy. All at once, ten Astrals leaped upon Sousuke. A booming cannon shot echoed in the air and two of the Astrals were immediately damaged. Kurtz was available to provide reliable sniper cover from his hiding place.

"What a bother. I had hoped to spend the night with you as well," said Leonard in a slight pout. Kaname flushed deeply at his words. "But alas, we always seem to be interrupted," he sighed. "Do you want to come with me, Kaname?" he asked, offering her his hand. She shook her head and stepped back.

"I was afraid it would come to this. But rest assured, _hime_-san, you _will_ see me again," he said with a winning, princely smile. "You can count on it." With that, Leonard leaped over the railing. Kaname, partially shocked and partially curious ran to the balcony's edge to watch him free fall off the tall cliff where his estate sat upon and open a parachute onto a yacht that was waiting below the cliff on the calm ocean below. _Like a game of chess on a global scale, he always anticipates a few moves ahead of his opponent_, thought Kaname, almost admiringly, but caught herself as if she had just swallowed something bitter.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I had actually imagined Kaname going over to Leonard before I read "Continuing On My Own." I apologize because I am NOT a mecha writer but I will try my best. I apologize to Tessa fans since my story is so Kaname-centric...(Kero feeling guilty, hides her anti-Tessa League badge from prying eyes--I like her but, most times, she's just annoying). Somehow I feel like Kaname should be clarified in a bit a of AU mid-plot. Though Kaname's first kiss really was stolen by Leonard, I wanted Sousuke to have her first kiss, more like the way Tateo Retsu-san had ended the first FMP comic. Please, when it is sold in languages that you can understand, other than Japanese, go ahead and get her new FMP: _Sigma _comic in stores, which follows "End of Day by Day" fairly closely. I really love her art.

Also, though Kaname and Sousuke don't really exchange their mutual feelings until midway into the novel "Continuing On My Own" I wanted to explore a closely connected Kaname and Sousuke—naturally since Gatou-san's flow is more "action adventure" and my aim circumvents around shoujou manga-ness. Alas, (Kero starts to wail) I will be clear over _thirty-five_ before I can read the US release of "Moeru One Man Force!" (Kero continues to sob—will I have children by then???) Damn! Must I be robbed of my simple pleasures? (shakes a fist at the cruel world and continues to sob) P.s. Thanks to Blackwolf581 for the additional information.

--Kero (9/20/07)


	6. Jinsei no Merry Go Round

Jinsei no Merry Go Round

Kaname watched the disturbing scene before her quietly. Two Codarls had come through the forest area surrounding the estate and entered the garden from the left. Two others came from the right. The sound of their steps that carried their weight of 10.8 metric tons reverberated through the ground and resounded heavily in her chest. All were painted blood red. Their gleaming crimson eyes watched, assessed and calculated the situation carefully. Two M-9s, with a pile of broken Astrals and litter of broken insides under their feet stood motionless, waiting for the other side to move. The Astrals that had not retreated at Leonard's exit attempted to take Kaname again, but were stopped by Mao and Bel's units and now obediently stayed silent.

Leonard was most likely far away by now, perhaps his yacht caught up with a helicopter further down the beach. He was out of range and most likely untraceable by the TDD-1, having picked a meeting place with Kaname that was famous for its rugged cliffs and unfriendly shoreline that was unapproachable for miles by ship, let alone submarine. Kaname knew that she would see him again. _As sure as the sun rises_, she thought, like life's merry-go-round, surely she would run into him again. The paths of the Whispered would always be intertwined.

Kaname wondered if these "Venom" pilots could use the Lambda Driver. Most likely they could. Most likely, Leonard, in his mad genius and self-righteous reasoning had found a way to mass produce the false axis repulsive field generator system. Without really considering why, she knew that this was his doing. If these enemy pilots were skillful, they could crush the M-9s in a heartbeat. Why weren't they moving? The four Codarl units' heads swiveled and pivoted until they all seemed to focus on the girl in the white dress standing to the side. Kaname concluded that like the Astrals, they were given explicit instructions to keep her out of harm's way.

_I know that the palladium reactor that powers the AS uses cold fusion, _thought Kaname unwillingly. _I know it because I can see the formula right now in my head. The square root of…no, that's not important right now. _Inadvertently, Kaname started to "see" the specs of the Codarl units, the most recent 'children' of Black Technology. She couldn't stop thinking about them as they stood in front of her. Her legs felt as though they were going to buckle beneath her and she realized she was trembling from head to toe as the foreign thoughts continued to flow. _I know that the reactor is in the Codarl's back, I can see every wire that powers the body of elector active polymer. The reactor is an electrical power generator with notable advantages in power output and low noise in addition to its low waste heat_, _but overuse of the Driver can cause the unit to overheat…the Codarl is imperfect because of an incomplete formula,_ thought Kaname. Again, the numbers started to flow out like water from a floodgate in her mind and she was helpless to stop it.

Kaname felt a rough tug on her wrist. Who was pulling her? It was Sousuke. She could hear his voice but it sounded muffled and far away.

"Stop," she said aloud. She squinted her eyes shut and let out a little wail, holding her head at both sides.

"Chidori?" asked Sousuke tentatively, truly concerned as he tried to grab her other hand. But Kaname wriggled free of his grip entirely and blindly reached out for the trunk of the nearest tree. Then, to his horror and without warning, she rammed her forehead against the rough bark and slumped to the ground. Her breathing was heavy and a trickle of blood disappeared into the blades of grass beneath her.

"Chidori?!" he called out, pulling her away from the offensive object that had made her bleed.

"I'm OK," she breathed, eyes still closed. "There are a bundle of circuits in the left groin area of the Codarl. It like the main system of arteries powering the EAP suit; shoot there. Or, make them use their Lambda Drivers twice in rapid succession, within .8 of a second. They will begin to overheat instantly and lose 42.2 percent of their maneuvering ability," she said simply.

"Chidori…how--?" was all he could manage for the moment. She didn't answer him. She had done the calculations in her head, of course. Sousuke looked at her and in that second he understood her 'curse' for what it was. He picked her up hastily and ran over to a cluster of trees approximately 50 meters away from the Codarls. Almost instantly, he heard the M-9s and Codarls begin their melee, just as Kaname had reached a safer distance. The sound of the AS's heavy footfalls and exploding Mauser MGK 35mm rifle shells against GDC-B 40mm rifle shots tore through the estate grounds.

"Stay here," he instructed, looking sternly into her eyes. Her expression was less glazed over now but it was still fearful. He reached into his sleeve pocket for the tranquilizer Tessa had told Sousuke to give Kaname, if she looked a little "disturbed." Sousuke did not tell his commanding officers or his Captain that Kaname had already told him what was supposedly classified information about her abilities, and what they threatened to do to her sanity. He could also see that for himself.

She stopped his hand by placing her own on top of it.

"I don't want it," she mumbled. "I want to stay awake and fight it." Her eyes squinted again, as if she were continuing the struggle internally.

"I'll be back soon," he said hastily. There wasn't time to tend to her. Though Tessa had indicated that contact between a Whispered who was 'trained' with one who was still 'asleep' could render Kaname a little unstable. He needed to make sure the situation was safe and he'd let the Captain help her. He would protect her at all costs.

Sousuke rushed over to his Arbalest, and found it still kneeling in the place he had first left it, on the eastern side of the estate. The emerald gleam in its eye acknowledged him. Sousuke never ceased to be amazed by the machine's 'personality.' He entered the cockpit and heard it seal away the outside world as the chest plate and hatch door slid back into place.

**Awaiting further instruction, Sergeant Sagara,**said Al's voice in its usual nonchalant manner.

"Initiate sequence Alpha 4, move to engage," he responded.

**Roger,** obeyed his A.I. After a brief moment, it added, **How is Miss Chidori?**

"Not now," grumbled Sousuke. He needed to focus. He had to protect her.

From the roof of the east wing of the estate Kurz fired his GDC-B 40mm rifle at one of the Codarls but he half expected it to raise its crazy invisible force shield once more and shatter his shot into a thousand pieces. But just as this shot was about to face that same fate, an M1108 anti-tank dagger flew out of nowhere to the exact spot where Kurz had fired. Just as the force shield visibly shuddered at the impact of Kurz' shot Sousuke's blade cut right through. In that split second the Codarl had tried and failed to block itself a second time with its Lambda Driver. Sousuke's dagger pierced the hatch on the left side, and it trembled and fell to its knees. A spray of white smoke shot out of the Codarl's exhaust vents, as it tried to compensate for the overheated palladium reactor but to no avail. It was exactly as Kaname had said it would be.

**One, **said Al as Sousuke mouthed the word in Japanese.

Sousuke's Arbalest drew its GRAW-2 Monomolecular cutter and launched right into the next attack at the nearest Codarl still standing to his left. Close combat was the best option to avoid unnecessary damage to his comrades' units. With agile speed he was up close to the enemy unit in a matter of seconds. All he could think about was Kaname, huddled under the tree. The enemy Codarl immediately recoiled and let out a pressured blast from its Lambda Driver. Sousuke didn't flinch but his determination immediately raised his own shield as a counter measure. In a show of pure determination, Sousuke's defense immediately flowed into an offensive move and his cutter from within his own force shield leveled out with an extension of the Arbalest's arm and in a flash of light the head of the Codarl was sheared off. It staggered backwards and fell with a loud crash, cracking the stone tiles of the balcony overlooking the ocean. Black smoke billowed out from the neck and severed head of the Codarl separately.

**Two. **_Ni_.

Returning the cutter to its place, he did not hesitate with the next target, either. Just as the second Codarl crashed into the floor, a third Codarl shot its MGK 35mm rifle at him as it attempted to retreat. The bullets bounced off Sousuke's invisible shield. Mao doused the Codarl with a scatter of live rounds from her own ASG96-B 57mm smooth-bore gun. Sousuke raced up to the Codarl that had deftly sprinted in her direction in pursuit. With its back to Sousuke, he retrieved his anti-tank dagger from the chest of the first Codarl and raced towards them. With the help of his Lambda Driver his dagger was immersed in the kinetic force of his own will, reshaping his force shield around its form, both repelling the enemy's force shield that clumsily tried to push him back and piercing it, Sousuke found the open slot between its left leg and its body and jabbed upward. In an instant, the Codarl's limbs were rendered useless and it stumbled forward at reduced speed and finally crashed into a group of tall pine trees that Mao had nimbly jumped over.

**Three. **_San_**.**

The last Codarl, furthest away from Sousuke was engaging in a full frontal attack against Bel. Through his adept AS skills, Uruzu 1 was able to dodge most of the flying bullets but the last round did manage to damage his gun arm. Sousuke was on the assailant in half an instant with his "Boxer" 57mm scattershot drawn.

"Uruzu 1, NOW!" exclaimed Sousuke through their com link. Bel made a sudden move left, pivoting on his left leg and changing direction as Sousuke fired. This was the last one. He had to protect her. Each of his bullets were coated in his fortitude and in a matter of seconds the back of the Codarl was riddled with holes. Having hit the reactor directly, Sousuke jumped out of the way as the enemy unit exploded to pieces.

**Four. **_Yon._

He surveyed the area. It was finished. The estate grounds seemed unusually quiet now that the fighting was over.

"Uruzu 7!" said Mao's voice over the com link, almost desperately. Sousuke's attention was snapped back from combat mode. "The Codarls are fixed to self-destruct!" She immediately pulled away from the Codarl she was inspecting and it's blinking eye slit and jumped to a safer distance.

"Sousuke!" cried Kurz from the roof. "Kaname-chan—" he began. But he didn't have to finish. Sousuke was already rushing towards where he had last left Kaname. Without even having to explain it to her, she jumped onto the hand of the kneeling Arblest, and in an instant they were in the air. The remaining Codarl's exploded, shooting tree debris and streaming metal meteorites ranging in the size of a human fist to to car door rained everywhere, setting most of the trees alight. Sousuke landed on the estate roof with Kurz and surveyed the area through Al's eyes. The total time lapse from beginning to end was 59.9 seconds.

**All targets eliminated, Sergeant Sagara,** said Al's mechanical voice.

"Ah," responded Sousuke, loosening his grip of the controls. "Well done, partner." He opened the cockpit and looked down to where Kaname still was, clinging to Al's thumb. Her visage was frighteningly pale and she looked as though she was going to be ill.

"Kaname?" he called out, unbuckling himself from his seat and jumping out of the cockpit to where she was. She finally let go of her death grip on the huge thumb and crumpled into his arms. He held her tightly against his chest.

"Sousuke," she saw rather weakly. "I don't know how much more of this I can take."

Understanding her meaning, he brushed an errant lock of hair from her face and said nothing at first.

"I will always protect you, no matter what," he said after a solemn moment.

"I'm sorry," she said, turning her face to hide it against his chest. He didn't know what she could be apologizing for.

"Uruzu 7," said Bel's voice in his ear piece. "Is Angel all right?"

"Affirmative. All enemy units are destroyed, awaiting orders to regroup with TDD-1," he responded.

"Sergeant Sagara," said Tessa's strained voice through his earpiece. She had most likely overheard the conversation between Kaname and Sousuke. "Please take Angel to the coordinates we are sending, and regroup with Geybo 9."

"Roger," he replied and turned off his com link. He made sure Kaname was all right and returned to the cockpit where the coordinates were already blinking on Al's screen.

**She's jealous,** observed Al.

"Nobody asked you," retorted Sousuke.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: A hearty thanks to all those who cared enough either way to review this story. Your words of encouragement are helpful. Geez, you don't know how I struggled with this chapter, even if the fight sequence turned out to be oh so brief. Trust me, a few hours of research and an entire battle strategy scribbled on the back of a phone bill with X's and O's like a football coach's clipboard notes preceded this chapter. No more! I'm not a mech writer!! I also nearly flunked Physics in high school and my highest test scores were always in English and History not Calculus or Chemistry…Heh, it's safe to say that I don't work with numbers for a living. (Kero nibbles away at the tip of her Pocky stick, and turns the pages of her latest volume of _The Wallflower_ for emotional comfort…) _Ah_, competent mech writers, don't shoot me.

--Kero (9/21/07)


	7. Zutto Kimi No Soba De

**Chapter 7: **_**Zutto Kimi No Soba De**_

Kaname looked out over the railing from the rooftop of the east building of her school. The world looked so tranquil from this point of view. Below, only the comings and goings of everyday life, above her, the seemingly eternal heavens in their endless dance of planets and stars. The September sun was starting to descend gently pushed by the autumn moon that would never fail to take its turn in the spotlight. There were no wars from this point of view. Mechs and guns did not exist here. The only bothersome issues in this existence were questions like, 'What should I have for dinner?' and 'Should I finish my other homework before tomorrow's math quiz?' There was no such thing as the _Whispered_ and the voices of angels or demons or both did not haunt her dreams with Black Technology.

Back in France Leonard had assisted with some tests on her while Kaname sat in a cold, sterile room attached to various monitors and machines. When Leonard turned on a certain program he had designed himself Kaname thought she could suddenly hear chanting in the back of her mind. It was so soft she thought she was imagining things at first. But in the dark depths of that monotonous hum she came to the startling realization that the knowledge in her head was deep and seemingly endless. The floodgates were opening and a rush of strange words and symbols, all of which he understood, came forth like a burst from a fountain. She forced herself to close off her mind in fear of it, and partly because she did not want Leonard to see what was there. Kaname could barley recall what it was the voice had sung to her but even as she ripped off the connecting electrodes from her skin and demanded to be let out of the lab Kaname understood it all; the workings of Tuatha de Danaan, the Arbalest, Behemoth, the Lambda Driver—everything. And there was so much more. Much to her horror, in her head was an endless chasm of Black Technology.

In her hand, the class broom and a bag of rubbish she was supposed to take to the trash bin waited patiently for her to finish her quiet reverie and get back to business. Taking such a long break was so unlike her. She was always such a no nonsense type of girl. But that sudden trip to the south of France and the lingering image of platinum blonde hair blowing gracefully in the wind kept her from returning to business as usual. What was this feeling of seduction, as if she were playing Eve's part in the Garden?

She could still hear his voice in her head. "The _Whispered_ are relics of Arcadia, or perhaps we date even further back than Atlantis. Maybe we were already there when Cronos swallowed his children, when God wove the universe in seven days." Ridiculous as they sounded out loud, Leonard's words rang true in her heart. The knowledge she possessed, knowledge that she could barely recall when awake, seemed eternal and damned. Did people create Black Technology, or was it the reverse? She rarely ever thought of such heavy questions and the burden of seeking their answers weighed down her spirits.

"Chidori," said a familiar voice behind her. He started to say something again, but faltered. After a little hesitation, he said, "Kaname."

She turned to see Sousuke and gave him a grateful look. If not for rescuing her back in France then for pulling her back to the present. But even Sousuke knew that her smile was forced.

"Are you all right?" His concern was touching and his expression priceless. She needed to perk up.

"Of course," she responded cheerily. She walked over and handed him the broom and trash bag. "Last I recalled you were on garbage duty _indefinitely_." He stiffened a little as he took these articles from her with a half salute.

"Understood," was his response. Kaname sometimes felt bad about tricking him into endless garbage duty but little things like this made her feel better. She was happy that he indulged her.

As they descended the flight of stairs back to the first floor of the building Kaname suddenly blurted out words she was thinking but had no intention of letting out.

"Where are we going with this?" It was really a rhetorical question.

"Um," said Sousuke looking at the bag. "To the trash bin and incinerator?"

"N-No," stammered Kaname. "That's not what I was talking about." He looked exceedingly puzzled. "I mean, where do we go from here with Amalgam and Mithril and everything?" It was a question that loomed over her ever since the hijacking incident but it was something she never wanted to think about. Wasn't her motto to live in the present?

"Mithril will protect you," said Sousuke simply. "There would be unthinkable consequences if you fell into the enemy's hands—" he began.

"Am I just a commodity to be protected or taken then?" she sighed and looked away.

"N-no," he faltered. That wasn't what he meant. The thought of people experimenting on Kaname and forcing her to relinquish the information hidden inside of her through cruel inhumane tactics was exceedingly disturbing to him.

"Would you even look twice at me if I wasn't who I am?" The question took him a bit by surprise. But for their particular circumstances he would never have even met Kaname. But as fate would have it, there they were. He wouldn't have it any other way.

_How can I tell her that I will always be by her side?_ His heart pleaded with his mind to speak.

Sousuke didn't quite know how to express this to her but the look in her eyes told him she needed some reassurance. Should he drop everything and kiss her like he's seen Kurz do endless times to other ladies while on shore leave? The thought of doing something so openly in the hall would open him to attacks once he let his guard down and it was completely contrary to all his military training to be emotionally involved in a mission but…she needed something right now. It was something that he, deep in his heart, hoped he could give her because he…

"Nevermind," she said, as she smiled and waved her hand to dismiss the mood, as if brushing it away like garbage. It wasn't a fair question and she knew it. To his relief and chagrin the moment for him to act had come and gone.

"Did you study for the Classics test tomorrow?" she asked as they continued along the hall.

"Affirmative. But I'm having problems with Li Bo's poem at the end of the lesson. I can't figure out if he's trying to make a cup of tea or trying to build a tank." His face was so earnest that she didn't have the heart to laugh at him.

"I think it may be the former and not the latter," she responded with a wayward glance and a sigh. They walked out to the open courtyard and the sound of their soft footsteps filled the space. Kaname glanced down and noticed that they were walking alongside one another with a long, uninterrupted crease in the concrete slab between them. It was such a fine line they walked to be like this together. Someday, maybe in the near future, would they have to part ways? This was another thought that loomed over her since that first incident and she had mistakenly believed from Mao that he had already been reassigned halfway around the world on another mission. She had no words to express how relieved she was when he was near her again. The feeling resurfaced when he came for her in France. Would he always be with her?

_How can I ask you to never leave me? _There was no way she could ask that of him.

Her inner turmoil came from whether she could continue to risk his life in doing so. The thought of him willingly throwing himself in the face of Death to save her was not at all comforting. She never enjoyed the story of the damsel in distress. That perspective was too weak, too unlike her.

But the fear of Leonard coming for her one day in the near future could not be quelled. The tranquility in her world would shatter and through the pieces she would be forced into Sousuke's world of dark, never ending struggles between good and evil.

"Let's go for a chocolate parfait this weekend, Sousuke, to celebrate the end of the last math pop quiz. My treat," she declared suddenly. This question also took him by surprise.

"S-sure," he answered. The glow in her face returned, and he could almost feel her spirit revitalizing itself as he had seen so many times in the past. This girl was like the sun; though she might be eclipsed she would never disappear or be swallowed. It was her strength that drew him to her. Compared to him, she was so much more powerful on this level. He was like a man who had lived too long in the shadows and wanted to be near her if only to bask in that glow for as long as she would allow.

"O-ren chan and Hiyashimizu are still in the student council office. We'll stop by there to ask if they want to come too." As she spoke, she could feel her spirits picking up again. "Oh, there's Mizuki and Kyouko!" She called out to them and ran in their direction. Her feet felt lighter now as she crossed the courtyard with Sousuke close behind. _Chocolate can solve anything_, she thought to herself. Study first, then chocolate as the reward. In that moment she felt as though she and Sousuke could achieve anything together. He would stay by her side faithfully, no matter what, until the end. Whether it was until the end of his world, or hers, or both, it didn't matter at that moment.

_I wish this moment could last forever_, thought Sousuke as he tossed the bag into the incinerator and hurried after her.

_I wish it could be like this forever_, thought Kaname as she glanced back toward Sousuke to see him running after her.

Kaname stopped short and looked at her finger. There was a thin red line across the knuckle. How had she gotten that paper cut?

"Is something wrong?" asked Sousuke.

"Aw, Kaname-chan, you have a paper cut!" exclaimed Kyouko, coming towards them. "I have an adhesive bandage at my desk. Can it wait?"

"It's okay, Kyouko. I left some bandages in my foot locker. I'll just go grab one. Hold up," she explained. Chasing after Sousuke was always wearisome on her feet, therefore it had made sense to keep bandages in her shoe locker to cushion the blisters. She hurried off and left for the entrance hall, asking the others to wait for her for lunch.

As she came across the lockers her attention was immediately drawn to hers. She hadn't left the door open. There were no locks on these cubbyholes and anyone could slip a note or love letter without being seen but instinct told her to use caution. Naturally, she would not go so far as to ask Sousuke to explode the lockers because someone had tampered with hers, but she slowly approached waiting and half expecting to hear something ticking. In the end all was quiet. Only a single white envelope on her street shoes awaited her when she peered inside.

The fancy calligraphy on the outside and the parchment paper envelope told her that this was no ordinary letter. She opened it and caught the faint scent of lavender water.

"_**Please meet me at the park by your apartment at 8 p.m. Come alone. Yours faithfully, L.**__"_

Her emotions plummeted to an all time low in one breath. Kaname came to the realization that as long as she was living, they would never leave her alone.

* * *

Author's Note: I realized that my story sounded like it was coming to an end at the last part of the prior chapter. I'm sorry it took this long to write this chapter, which really turned out to be like a denouement of the last story arc. _Zutto Kimi No Soba De_ means "always by your side," and it's an end theme song to Flame of Recca. It's really one of my favorite songs of all time and it describes a couple that struggle and fight to be together—rather like our hero and heroine here.

I could have ended it here to be faithful to the novels but it felt wrong and restricting. In the end, I decided to make this entirely AU from this point forward, despite the fact that the novels are ongoing.

This is an in-between chapter, isn't it? I always enjoy the interaction between Sousuke and Kaname. I want to play around a bit with a theme of Kaname walking that fine line of light and dark where Sousuke and Leonard await her on either side. It's really frustrating that they can't just come out and say they like each other in the anime and the novels, but then again, that's what we're here for, right? Embellishing is what we do for kicks.

-Kero (8/16/08)


	8. Kaname no Kamikakushi

**Chapter 8: **_**Kaname no Kamikakushi**_

"This formula and all of the theorems on the board will be on the semester's final exam. Please memorize them all," was written on the side board in neat, even letters in the hand of their no nonsense math teacher. As the students came in from lunch Kaname, as class rep, was told by Suzuki-sensei to read it aloud and make sure everyone was aware of the instructions. All at once the students in Class II-4 started to groan aloud, whine and cry at various tones and levels. One of their classmates even cried out "Oh my God!" in English clutching his head with both hands.

"Silence!" yelled their class rep and she scratched her head in agitation. "Everyone just study hard and do your best!" she said in finality, ending the lamentation and sobbing. All at once her classmates turned to her with pleading eyes.

"Kaname-san, can I borrow your math notes?" said Ono-D.

"No! Me first!" said Kyouko.

"No! She promised to tutor me after school today!"

"Hell no! I'll pay you ¥5,000 to tutor me first!"

"Kaname-san!"

"Kaname-chan!"

She raised a hand and stomped a foot onto the nearby chair in a very unladylike fashion, pulled out her _halisen_ and smacked it against the board to silence them all with her powerful authority. "I'm sorry, everyone. But Sousuke asked me for my notes first," she said in her sweetest, most docile tone. Every one started to whine.

"It's true," said Sousuke getting up from his seat and bowing his head in apology. "I've fallen so behind in class that it will take me quite some time and I certainly won't be done with it before tomorrow's quiz. I'm certain Chidori's notes will help my scores improve. So everyone should just do their best." Several objects were hurled in his direction but before they struck him and before further protest could be offered she grabbed Sousuke by the collar and raced out the door with her bodyguard in tow.

"Sousuke, you moron, you shouldn't declare things like that!" said Kaname, huffing and puffing as they completed their narrow escape. The two of them were resting against the wall of one of the empty corridors between the two wings of their school. It was a free period and no one else was around. "It will only provoke them further. You're already among the most unpopular people in class but I think your ratings just went negative."

"Sorry," he said quietly, rubbing his neck and shoulder where she had him in a death grip just moments before. Sometimes her superhuman strength scared him.

"It's weird how I've gotten so much better in math isn't it?" she asked, her mood suddenly solemn.

"You're smart," he answered thoughtfully.

"No, that's not it, I don't think. My math scores have been on the rise ever since…the hijacking. It's like something's awakened in me that I can't put back to sleep. It's almost scary how easy the formula's come to me like random thoughts in my head." She sighed loudly in frustration. "What am I becoming?" _Am I supposed to answer that question or will _he _answer it for me tonight?_

Sousuke put a hand on her shoulder and looked her squarely in the eye. Kaname was rather taken aback at the abruptness and almost had to look away to hide the flush in her cheeks.

"You will always be you," he said with complete earnestness and acceptance.

"You don't care what I am?" she asked. "Even if I turn out to be a monster underneath?" The chanting voice during the tests that Leonard ran on her again came to mind but she forced it back down again.

"You could never be that to me." Perhaps it was the honesty in his countenance, or the genuine feeling of appreciation his words triggered in her heart, or both, that caused her to lean forward and kiss him on the cheek. She didn't care who saw them as she rested her forehead against his shoulder.

"Thank you," she said quietly. Here was one place she would always be accepted and the realization came to her so suddenly that she couldn't bear to look him in the eye out of fear that she might tear up. Even if her classmates resented her for being so good at her studies and driving up the test score mean, even if her father still resented her for the death of her mother, even if someone took the Black Technology in her head and destroyed the world with it—even if that someone was her—he would still accept her. Or at least, she wanted to believe he would.

_That's why I can't stay with you, Sousuke. I don't want you to see what I'm turning into._

"K-Kaname," he stuttered as they stood there in that pose in silence for and awkward moment. Would people passing by think that they were going out? That he, a toughened military nut was going out with this beautiful and surprisingly fragile girl?

The thought was not unpleasant to him.

"Sorry, Sousuke," she said after a while, still unmoving. "There's just something comforting about this pose."

"Don't be sorry," he said gently as his hands slowly moved up to embrace her. Before his hands reached her shoulders he heard someone coming up around the bend. His hands immediately dropped to his sides. The footsteps suddenly stopped and walked away.

_Just hold me, damnit, just for now, _she thought in frustration. As if on cue, his arms slowly found themselves around her waist and the small of her back. She stepped closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, standing on her toes because he was a bit taller than she was.

Her eyes stared out into the empty hall that she did not see. Instead, she envisioned that sweet little fishing spot under an orange sky. "No matter what happens from here on out, you need to believe in me," she said cryptically. Sousuke furrowed his brow since he did not quite understand the meaning behind her words though the request was simple enough. But just as he was about to ask her to further clarify, the half bell rang, declaring that only half an hour was left of the free period. Kaname released him and stepped back.

"Oops! I almost forgot Miss Kagurazaka wanted me to pick up some English worksheets at her desk before the next period began. I have to go now," she said in her usual casual manner.

Sousuke was a little confused about what had transpired between them just a second ago, but since she was acting normal again, he didn't dwell on it. He only wished their embrace had lasted a little longer.

"Don't wait up for me after school, OK? I have to run a few errands and then I'll go straight home."

"Sure," he responded as he watched her turn and leave down the empty hall. Little did he know that it was the last time he'd see her uniformed figure gracing the halls of Jindai High School.

When evening came, most of her friends and acquaintances had not really thought twice about what she had done for them before she left school. Kyouko and Ono-D found a complete copy of her math notes waiting for them on their desks after they came back from their club meetings. There was a little note inside indicating she was billing them each ¥5,000 and a little smiley face. She hadn't bothered signing her name. They each praised their friend's generosity as they headed down the hall to go home. As they passed the student council meeting room, they didn't notice Ren's surprised exclamation to the student council president Hayashimizu that Kaname had preempted their request for a complete budget of the remaining school year. She had also submitted a detailed ten-page report on meeting room rotations, as there was a shortage of clubrooms at Jindai, so that each club could have an equal opportunity to meet somewhere. On top of her submissions, Kaname left two gummy marshmallows for each of them. Hayashimizu squeezed the marshmallow in its wrapper suspiciously while Ren ate hers happily with a cup of hot tea. Just then, Miss Kagurazaka peeped her head in the door.

"Has anyone seen Kaname-chan?" she asked.

"No, sensei. Why?" asked Ren, offering her a cup of tea.

"No thanks," declined Miss Kagurazaka politely. "I just wanted to thank her for collecting all the English homework and putting it in alphabetical order for me. It really helps with grading."

"Sensei," asked Hayashimizu in his deep, unaffected voice. "Do you know if Chidori-san is going somewhere?"

"Going somewhere? Like a vacation?" she asked.

"Like a leave of absence," he queried.

"Huh. Not that I know of. That only sounds like something Sousuke would do. Why do you ask?"

"No, no reason," he responded. "Good evening, sensei."

"Good evening."

Even as Miss Kagurazaka continued to look for her in the halls at Jindai, Kaname was shopping for food at the local market near her house. For whatever reason, she wanted to eat a really big, gorgeous meal tonight. She splurged a little and bought ingredients for tempura shrimp, pork cutlet in sesame sauce, and grilled salmon.

_It's not like this is going to be my last meal or anything,_ she said to herself, laughing at her own ridiculousness. But she bought the ingredients nonetheless and cooked to her heart's content.

As the clock struck seven o'clock she packed the leftovers from her meal in two convenient little bento packs. One of them she tied with a blue ribbon and placed it on top of the others in her refrigerator. On her dining table she scribbled out a little note to the person she was sure would come looking for her here when she didn't show up for school tomorrow.

"_The other bento is for Ami-chan. You need to stop eating those 'Calorie Mates.' I'm sorry that I had to break my promise about the chocolate parfait. I guess I wasn't in the mood for it after all. When I spoke with you this afternoon I realized that I couldn't continue like this. I want everything here in this world to stay the same. I want everyone to stay as they are and be safe. I won't risk the lives of the people I love by staying here any longer. I'm off to discover who and what I am. Wish me luck. Don't look for me. Kaname."_

Though it pained her to write it, she had to include that last sentence. Of course, he wouldn't obey so easily but she had to convey her intent to him nonetheless. This was something she had to do, and she had to do it alone. When she tidied up her living space and watered her plants it was fifteen minutes before the meeting time. Kaname was always one to be punctual but she felt her feet dragging all the way to the entrance as she put on her new dress and jacket and opened the door. She had made sure to purchase new clothes and slippers right before closing time at the little boutique by her school. Kaname couldn't risk Ami-chan tracking her either. After neatly folding up her uniform and skirt on the table, she indulged one last look at her apartment before she closed the door.

Taking the back exit from her apartment she headed towards the local park, and carefully stayed in the shadows, avoiding eye contact with anyone who happened to pass by. As she approached the entrance to the tree-lined park Kaname looked up and listened to the wind through the branches. She couldn't shake the feeling that something sinister was about to come. It reminded her of the Ray Bradbury novel she had read about the cursed circus. She half expected a scary clown to step out from the bushes. Still, even if a stray cat came out from the shadow she wasn't sure that she wouldn't jump out of her skin.

The area was completely empty now, as it was several hours past sunset. Aside from the rustling leaves, Kaname heard the sound of the squeaky chains of the swings on the play set, and the buzzing of the electric light poles encircling the play area. As her eyes adjusted to the space, she stepped closer to the center of the little park. Kaname realized that she was no longer alone and she steeled her nerves. A single figure dressed all in white sat with his back facing her on the merry-go-round. His hair shone silver under the lamplight. Had he just appeared there? There was so little sound at his entrance but she was certain that his Astrals were close by.

"I'm so glad you made it, Kaname-san," he said in his usual, polite speech.

"I wish I could say the same to you," she replied. He pushed his feet against the pavement so the spinning metal contraption he was sitting on went 180 degrees to face her and then stopped the movement with the heel of his silver-tipped shoes. Leonard gave her a winning smile.

"Have you made a decision about us?"

Kaname wasn't sure which "us" he was referring to, as he often liked to play with words in front of her. "You mean your little evil organization?" she snickered. "I've decided that I don't like you or them."

"So why are you here?" he asked innocently.

"I'm not quite sure myself but I want you to leave everything that I hold dear alone." She looked at him with steady determined eyes. "And I'll use myself as a bargaining chip." Leonard was certain that he was falling ever deeper in love with her as he dared to look into their depths.

"You have my word that we will," he responded in his soft, silky voice and a matching smile.

"I need to be sure," she insisted. His smile widened and he got up and walked over to her. The clicks of his heels were steady and even as he approached her. Then, he bowed before her, took up her right hand and kissed it.

"I can promise you that Amalgam will leave all of it untouched. We will remove the remote bomb we planted in your father's limousine at the U.N. We will scrap the plans to kidnap your little sister at her middle school academy in New York. As far as I am concerned, the operation to kidnap your best friend and hold the entire high school hostage never existed. My word is my bond." He said these things so nonchalantly as if he were reading things off a weekend to-do list. It really unnerved her.

"I have your absolute promise, then?" she asked steadily.

"Of those things, yes."

"Also swear to me that you and your group will neither kill nor harm Sousuke in any way; no matter how hard he tries to retrieve me." He thought about this request for a moment and pursed his lips. This was perhaps the tallest order.

"Then in exchange you must promise to come away with me to a place where they will never find you."

"I promise," she said finally.

"Then, as a representative of the group, I welcome you to Amalgam."

As she and Leonard drove away towards the airport in the limousine that was waiting for them at the other entrance to the park, Kaname shifted the light duffel she carried on her shoulder with her most prized possessions: a picture of her and her mother, her mother's watch, her signed copy of _So Long, and Thanks For All the Fish_, and a little stuffed Bonta-kun. It seemed so unreal that just a few hours ago she was living the life of a normal high school girl. She wistfully thought of her friends and classmates. The lights from the city whizzed by, as she stared at her reflection in the tinted glass. _He_ would probably be worried about her. But not Sousuke or Ami, her father or Mithril would find her anytime soon; the girl who was spirited away without a trace on a calm autumn night.

* * *

Author's notes: She finally did it. She crossed over to the dark side. Will she be the one to bring balance back to the Force? Who knows? I haven't decided yet. Please R&R. _Kamikakushi _literally means "spirited away," i.e. hidden/taken by gods.

-Kero (8/18/08)


	9. The Melancholy of Kaname Chidori

**Chapter 9: The Melancholy of Kaname Chidori**

Kaname brushed a lock of her hair aside from her face to get a better look at the small printed numbers on the cluster of paper clipped onto the board in front of her. She chewed on the tip of her pen thoughtfully and then circled a few numbers, crossed out others, and made little notes to herself in the margins. She unclipped the top sheet and turned it over. Then, as if she was merely writing a letter to a friend, her red felt-tipped pen drained out a long, complicated theorem with multiple variables that filled nearly the whole sheet. It was an equation she had been hypothesizing for quite some time now. As she finished up her notes she clicked the top of her retractable pen and absently placed it back in the pocket of her white lab coat.

She looked up and observed the long cylindrical liquid chamber in front of her. It was one of many in the laboratory that was her primary work place. She reached up and placed her palm on the cold glass, tapping the surface absently. Bubbles from its base gurgled up to the top only to be repeated in a long string of what almost looked like a curtain of glass beads streaming vertically from the bottom of the chamber to the top. Nearby, a monitor beeped monotonously signaling the constant temperature, heart rate and brain activity of the test subject within.

The boy in the tank had pale skin and dark Asian features. She had no idea what his name was. He was most likely of Japanese descent. His long lashes made him almost handsome but for his youth. Had he grown up in normal society he would probably be in middle school and a number of young girls would have left letters in his locker. In a way, he reminded Kaname a lot like Sousuke. Submerged in the water he was unconscious but breathing through an oxygen tube in his state of drug-induced slumber. The body suit he wore kept his body heat constant.

When she and Leonard had proposed this project to leverage funding from the Council she understood that eventually her theories had to be tested on human subjects, but that was none of her concern. She was not responsible for bringing them in or removing those who failed to endure the experiment. Kaname guessed that most of them were likely kids from third world countries who didn't have a choice in deciding if they wanted to be here or not.

She continued to gaze at him through the spaces between her fingers still resting on the glass, her reflection expressionless. Kaname's breath softly fogged the smooth glass surface. The cylinder reminded her of Snow White's glass coffin. Her spirits were as frigid as her ice-cold surroundings.

She recalled a time when she first arrived at this lab, dubbed the "Ice Cube" by those who were unfortunate enough to be stationed there, feeling lost and alone. The expansive place where she now considered her temporary home was literally carved out of blocks of ice, like a giant igloo or an ice hotel, and it was located just a few miles inland of the Amunsden Sea in Antarctica. Here in the unclaimed territory of the southernmost continent at the base of the globe she had spent many months now. Her work kept her occupied, helping her quell her feelings of unease. When the experiments had first begun, every night she would shake and cry with repulsion, anger and helplessness. She had to morally reconcile the fact that all of her test subjects were either kidnapped or purchased; that they all involuntarily went under the knife to have hardware directly installed into their brains; that they were her responsibility now. Her ethical quandary came with sacrificing these unfamiliar lives to protect the lives of those she loved. But as she delved deeper into the mysteries in her mind, she found herself growing more and more fascinated with her capabilities.

She placed the clipboard on a nearby block of ice that served as her worktable and rolled back her head along her shoulders to get the kinks out of her joints. Her eyes blankly observed the unadorned, smooth dome ceiling of the chamber. Kaname wondered if she should get some sleep. Here, in what she often referred to as the "butt-end" of the world, it was difficult to monitor day and night.

In this particular lab Kaname was working on the theory that anyone could operate a Lamba Driver if they were directly hardwired to it, thus reducing the need for drug induced states that often led to psychological instability or suicidal tendencies, and reducing the need for _Whispered_ to pilot the machinery. She designed the hardware in the laboratory and microchips that were embedded in the heads of each of her test subjects for this purpose. Two necessary factors of each test subject, she discovered, was an above average I.Q. as well as a certain pattern in their deoxyribonucleic acid, or DNA string that she called the "intuitive" genome. Using her own DNA as a map, she was able to pinpoint this particular protein-coding exon as being a more favorable variable for the experiment than those who did not have it. She was certain that the _Whispered_ had this characteristic that allowed them to intuitively act, as opposed to act on reason. Somehow this intuitive nature allowed them to delve into the same frequency with the Lamba Driver, and all the connection required was an electromagnetic pulse between the Driver itself and the pilot's brain.

As a norm, all _Whispered_ could operate the Lambda Driver without being wired into it or having their minds altered with drugs. But now, if her experiments proved successful she would single-handedly provide Amalgam with an entire army of elite fighters who could all use the Codarl and other machines that operated in concert with the Lambda Driver without fail. In fact, Leonard was working on a few newer models of elite arm slaves more advanced than the Codarl that were cheaper to create than his Astrals and utilized a human brain as part of its base operating system to corroborate Kaname's findings.

Needless to say, the Council was extremely pleased with the pair's progress and continued to fund their activities generously. Kaname created her own Swiss Bank account to shovel in her impressive paycheck, while she had access to a general account that was utilized to fund the laboratories' requisitions. She was even allotted a pair of assistants. She dubbed them "Tweedle-Dee" and "Tweedle-Dum" partly because they were only her "yes" men, but also because they barely understood her theorems and calculations and for the most part only did the heavy work leaving the complicated math to Kaname. As she developed her talents at the Ice Cube as a _Whispered_ she gained the nickname of "the girl wonder" among the other scientists.

"Kaname?" said a silky voice from the doorway. She turned to see Leonard, hair tied back unfashionably and donning a similar lab coat like hers, leaning against the doorway.

"Yes?" she asked nonchalantly.

"It's late. You should retire now and rest up for the presentation we have tomorrow for the Council. Bleary eyes and dark circles do actually show on the new hologram projectors," he smiled.

"I know," she answered "I was just finishing here."

"Have you eaten?" he asked.

"I'm not really hungry." In fact, most of the time when she spent long hours in her lab her appetite simply disappeared. Whether it was from the cold air or her internally quelled disgust at what she was doing Kaname couldn't decide.

"I have some Darjeeling tea, hot cream of salmon soup with a side of crème _brûlée_waiting for me in my quarters. Care to join me?" he suggested.

Kaname was too tired to find a clever rebuke. "Sure, why not?" She took one last vacant look at the boy behind the glass, or more popularly called _subject K1-001_, before leaving the room.

Since it was technically late into the night at the laboratory wing of the Ice Cube, though it almost always felt like night at the bottom of the world, Kaname only heard Leonard's and her footsteps echoing through the barren, icy halls. The rest of the staff were probably sleeping or quietly doing their paperwork in their rooms or the general lounge area. They passed several doorways, some of them residences, others laboratories, as well as the power generator room in the center of the massive cubed building. Finally, on the other side of the building were the residences and chambers of the elite staff and scientists working at the Ice Cube. Kaname's room was next to Leonard's and for a moment she was tempted to just call it a night but for the low growl she felt in her stomach. Out of pride she hoped Leonard did not notice.

"Welcome to my humble abode," he said cheerily as he opened the frosty metal door with a metal plaque labeled "L. Testarossa."

Leonard's use of "humble" misconstrued the elegant lifestyle he was accustomed to. Fine Persian carpets covered the floor to keep in the warmth of the electric furnace in the middle of the room. On top of the furnace was a fine silver platter with a bone china tea set steaming with the scent of fresh tea that hung in the air. A pair of tapestry fabric chairs sat on either side of the furnace with an antique looking, round and small mahogany side table between them. Behind a rich burgundy velvet curtain sectioning off a corner of the room she guessed was his bed and personal space. At the foot of what she presumed was his chair was a leather bound copy of Dostoevsky's _The Brothers Karamazov_, old enough to look like and original Russian first edition.

"You live quite comfortably, don't you?" mused Kaname.

"We do what we can to survive, do we not?" he smiled.

She sat down in the guest chair and he draped a fur lined coat over her shoulders to help her warm up. Kaname was not a fan of fur but under these conditions she was not one to complain about her fur-lined clothing and coverings on top of her bedding. Leonard served her tea first and then pulled out a silver pot from a metal tray in the furnace setting it on top of a small, wheeled cart by his side. He pulled out a pair of plates with elegant flatware and laid them neatly on the table between them. He then ladled the soup into matching platters and served her first, then himself.

Kaname was grateful for the meal. The last thing she remembered eating was some sort of sandwich with questionable meat that Tweedle-Dum had procured for her during midday. She ate in silence, all the while keeping her mind blank. Leonard had a habit of trying to _resonate _with her mind without her permission and Kaname found that keeping her mind blank made it difficult enough for him to stop trying.

"As soon as the presentation is over, I think we'll be ready to move the experiments to Amalgam's headquarters," he said absently, not really interested in the topic of conversation but merely offering it up to fill the silence.

"Hm," she responded. Kaname wasn't really interested in work related chitchat at that moment.

"Do you think I should wear my lavender suit or my white one for the presentation tomorrow?" he asked. Kaname looked up and wondered if he was being whimsical or if he was truly that vain.

"Lavender will look white in the hologram so it doesn't matter. But you're so pale, make sure you wear a vivid colored cravat to offset your skin," she said absently as she played with her soup with her silver spoon.

"True," he agreed, finishing up his soup in silence. When she was done, he politely excused herself, turning down his offer to tuck her into bed, and returned to her own chambers.

Tossing her lab coat on an armchair she reached over to the ice shelf that served as her dressing table and selected a silver handled hairbrush from the clutter that consisted of lip balm, make-up, an MP3 player and earphones, postcards and a random collection of decorative hair pins—most of which were gifts from Leonard at one point or another. On the wall hung an oval mirror. The only adornment in her room was the Bonta-kun sitting on the shelf in front of the mirror. Otherwise, the fur lined floor and bed was similar to those of the staff quarters.

Not even bothering to brush her teeth, Kaname hastily changed out of her button-up shirt, sweater, knee-length corduroy skirt and leggings in exchange for her nighttime thermal wear and long sleeping gown and crawled into bed. She turned off the lights just as she was used to turning off the thoughts in her mind to welcome sleep. On some nights Kaname would hear that sinister voice that whispered the secrets of Black Technology to her and it would always pull her closer to the black swirling pool of insanity; or she would have horrible dreams of experiments gone wrong, but this was not one of those nights. A deep, dreamless sleep soon came over her and she was ever so grateful.

Little did Kaname know that somewhere east of the Amunsden Sea in the South Pacific Ocean the Tuatha de Danaan was diving to a depth that would avoid detection from the Ice Cube. At the command center, sitting on her captains chair, Leonard's little sister was giving orders to the helm to enter the Amunsden Sea. They were going to deploy a team of arm slave scouts to search for an elusive research facility suspected of belonging to Amalgam. Mithril's spies had traced several curious requisitions for cryogenic hardware and materials to support cold fusion to Ushuala, a small port city on the tip of Argentina and uncovered coordinates to a remote base in nearby Antarctica. Under the suspicion that experiments based in Black Technology were taking place there due to the complexity and inimitability of the materials, Mithril had sent the Danaan to investigate.

Her technical staff and hangar crew had made the modification on the Arbalest and the M9's to endure the weather and frigid conditions of that region. It was an estimated three hours before actual deployment and they had just finished their briefing in the ready room.

"Mr. Mardukas,' said Tessa in her gentle voice. "Make a bearing for heading 9-0, at 35 knots."

"Aye Ma'am," answered her First Officer in his usual stiff manner. He repeated the instructions to the helmsman. They would not be going full speed, as the underwater terrain was uncertain here, with below surface ice formations and uncharted terrain being their primary obstacles.

"Do you think he will be ready for deployment, Mr. Kalinin?" asked Tessa carefully to the uniformed gentleman standing on her other side. She was of course referring to Sousuke, their top Arm Slave pilot who had previously been out of commission for six months on a leave of absence for "personal reasons." Everyone guessed what those "reasons" were. She even ventured to guess that he had even gone off on his own in search of "that girl." No one dared mention her name to him anymore out of fear it would trigger that empty, blank look in his eyes.

"He's had some time to come back to his senses. I think since he voluntarily came back to us, then he's ready."

Tessa wanted to believe in him. If what they suspected was true, she wanted to believe that Sousuke would be able to complete his mission at hand--even if "that girl" played for the other side now…even if he never found her. Today was as good as any to test that belief.

"Have the scouting team assemble for deployment at the top of the hour," she said with determination.

* * *

Author's notes: I was going to dramatic effect here, I don't know if I succeeded. More to come, I promise.

-Kero (8/20/08)


	10. Through the Looking Glass

**Chapter 10: Through the Looking Glass**

Kaname's eyes fluttered open in her dark room. An alarm was beeping loudly in the hall outside. She could hear hurried footsteps running to and fro outside her door. Her arm reached out to the nearby lamp and swatted empty air until she caught the pull chain with her fingers. One tug and the room was lit again, illuminating the icy walls in hues of pale blue and light green. A quick glance at the clock told her that she had only slept for three hours. Though it was not yet time for her to wake up, she was no longer sleepy. Something was happening outside. The meeting with the Council was in two hours, but she was certain that the commotion outside had nothing to do with that.

_Are they having a fire drill?_ she asked herself as she fell back onto her pillows again with her forearm across her eyes to keep the light at bay. The thought of fire burning a hole into the thick Arctic ice and dropping the entire laboratory into the deep abyss amused her greatly.

She contemplated going back to sleep again and returning to the dream she had left just moments ago. Kaname dreamt that she was back in Japan at her favorite amusement park. All of her friends were there, as well as her teachers. For whatever reason, she dreamt that Hayashimizu and Ren were married and they were king and queen of the park. Just before she was awakened, she imagined she was fishing with Sousuke just as the sun was setting. Kaname even recalled the contented sigh she let out in her dream as she rested her head on Sousuke's shoulders.

Just as she was collecting some semblance of joy from her quiet reverie there was a knock on her door. Before she could respond it opened and Leonard popped his head through.

"I don't recall permitting you to open my door," she said coldly, knowing who it was without even opening her eyes.

"I'd love to banter with you, Angel, but we haven't the time. We are to evacuate the Ice Cube immediately. _They've_ located us," he said hastily before closing the door again. Kaname heard his expensive shoes clacking their way down the icy hall.

She knew whom he meant. Letting in a deep breath she exhaled slowly and with purpose.

"It's your turn now, Bonta-kun," said Kaname quietly as she got up and patted her stuffed animal on the head. Changing quickly into thick heavy clothing, a heavy snow jacket and fur-lined, waterproof boots, she then packed her MP3 player into her personal duffel that she retrieved from her small closet. As a member of Amalgam, she was trained along with the others to pick up shop at the drop of a hat. With a wide swing of her arm all of her test results, reports, clipboard and her mini laptop computer were dumped into a silver briefcase with a dual lock and she was gone.

Kaname went immediately to her laboratory to direct personnel in her department to move the cylindrical tanks to the modified cold storage freight containers behind the Ice Cube. At the loading dock were several heavy duty snow vehicles that were on call at all times to be ready to move the important hardware to the Orion, a technologically sophisticated and extremely fast submarine, rivaling even the Danaan, which served as an alternate base for their personnel just south of the Ice Cube. Only precise handling would ensure the safety of her lab subjects. Kaname was there to give orders ensuring that every remote energy cell to maintain the life support of each cylinder was packed with their chargers, that all of the necessary life saving drugs, intravenous fluids and liquid nourishment for the subjects were collected, that her subordinates made sure the life support readings of each subject was stable enough for transport. Her test subjects were in her keeping. She would not have them killed due to mere incompetence.

Just as Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum were lowering the last cylinder, that of K1-001, the test subject's heart rate picked up and the life support system started to beep ominously. Kaname ordered one of her physician staff members to assess the situation immediately while the other cylinders were cleared out to the loading dock. She nervously watched as the doctor checked the monitor as well as the temperature reading on the cylinder.

"Chidori-san," said the doctor. "K1-001's heart rate is quickly deteriorating. It appears that he will not be fit for moving." Kaname knew what that meant. Any test subject who failed the experiment was to be exterminated. In this case, K1-001 would simply be injected with a lethal mixture of potassium chloride and pancuronium bromide for quick euthanasia while still asleep. The cylinder would then be dumped into the Arctic Ocean, forever sustaining a cold, dead form in a cryogenically sound tube. However "gentle" the doctors always described it Kaname couldn't stand the thought of killing anyone intentionally for such a reason. It was directly in contrast to her moral fiber and extremely repulsive to her sensibilities.

"Whether it is better for him to live or die is not for me to decide," she said firmly. "Wake him up."

"But Chidori-san," protested the doctor.

"I don't care how long it takes. I'll carry him with me all the way to the Aerie if I have to!" she demanded. Even if she had to hoist him on her back to the Amalgam headquarters barefoot, Kaname was determined not to leave him behind. The doctor, her subordinate, questioned her with a look but said nothing. Immediately, coma-reversing drugs were administered to the boy and the fluid within the cylinder drained through the tubes and pumps to some unknown place. The doctor opened the hatch of the tube and caught the boy as he fell out. She signaled her assistants to help put the boy on the examination table and they wrapped him in layers of blankets to help him adjust to the cold air in the laboratory. After observing him remove the tubes from his body Kaname dismissed the doctor and held the boy's wrist as she monitored his pulse with her watch. It was slow but steady at first, beating quicker to normal speed as the minutes drew on.

"I will meet you at the Aethia. Don't you dare take off without me," she commanded, handing her briefcase and her duffel to them. Her assistants looked at one another and nodded in acquiescence. They observed the last of the cylinders being carted off and exited the laboratory.

With only her and K1-001 in the room, the lab seemed eerily quiet all of the sudden. The boy stirred and his long lashes fluttered as he opened his eyes. Immediately his focus cleared and he observed Kaname's face calmly.

"Am I dead?" he asked in his native Japanese.

"You are not," she replied simply. He tried to get up, but Kaname held him down firmly and shook her head. "Please stay still until the drugs have taken full effect. You haven't walked for weeks so you will still be lightheaded and unsteady."

"Who are you?" he asked quietly.

"I am nobody," she answered with difficulty. How was she to tell him that she was partly responsible for uprooting him from his previous life to be a guinea pig for her experiments? "But you can call me Kaname."

"Kaname…san." He reflected on her name with a small smile.

"Do you know who you are?" she asked.

"No," said the boy. He furrowed his brow and contemplated this problem further. "I can't recall anything." K1-001 looked a bit concerned.

"You are known as subject K1-001 here," she offered.

"K1-001?" It was a peculiar name.

"K stands for Kaname. K1 is the name of my first project, what they call the K1-CC, or Cerebral Chip. You are my first of twelve test subjects, hence you are number 001," she said. "You will be trained to operate a specialized arm slave and you will be a foot soldier for Amalgam's private army."

"You're a scientist? You seem kind of young," he said doubtfully.

"I'm an ordinary person with extraordinary knowledge," she said sadly. "We're actually alike in many ways. They were going to kill you a moment ago but I thought I'd let you decide what you want to do. If you stay here, someone will come for you eventually, but I will need to expose the chip in your brain with a faint and brief pulse of low-grade radiation that will destroy my invention that was implanted in your head. With the exception of a few brain cells dying, it won't harm you and you won't feel a thing."

He thought about her words for a moment. "Why would they want to kill me?" he asked. She looked at his innocent expression and sighed. He was someone's son not so long ago and a forgotten boy no one wanted. There was something sad about their dual existence in that cold room. She couldn't shake the feeling that she needed to look after him.

"Because we have to get going, and you refused to be moved in your sleep state. Killing you would be easier than waking you up and caring for you."

"You saved me, then," he said with a relieved and grateful countenance.

"You really don't have to thank me. Trust me on that. But I have to get going. The others are waiting for me. What will you choose?" she asked. He thought again for a moment and gave her a shy, unassuming smile.

"Can't I come with you?" he asked. His request surprised her but she could see the loneliness in his eyes. Though he could not remember it, she realized he had come from a hard life only to wake up in a harder one. Kaname paused and looked up to the ceiling. There was a reflective glass surface twenty feet above them, technically the underside of one of many solar panels used to supply energy for the Ice Cube, and in its reflection there was another Kaname and another boy in a world that mimicked theirs. If not in this world, then maybe in the next, she and the boy could find happiness.

"There's a cold, dark world through that looking glass," she sighed. "I don't really want you to come with me." Kaname placed both hands on his shoulders and looked him right in the eye. "Are you sure?" she asked.

"I have nowhere else to go," said the boy simply.

"That makes the two of us," she replied wistfully.

Kaname found a pair of snow boots for the boy, whom she named Kenji, took his hand and led him out into the snowy wilderness beneath the light of a yellow sun. He squinted at the bright orb but somehow found comfort in its brightness. Like an older sister, she pulled the blanket over his head as the wind picked up and wrapped it closer to him like a warm cloak. Together, they trudged through the deep snow to the Aethia, Amalgam's version of a heavy duty propeller aircraft much like the US Air Force's V-22 Osprey with its tiltrotor capability for vertical take-off and landing. Already the Aethia's propellers were swirling up clouds of snow into the air as it prepared for take off, carrying the Ice Cube's top level personnel. Leonard was waiting for her by the open hatch.

"And this is?" he asked curiously eyeing the boy.

"Kenji," she responded simply. "He'll be traveling with us." She escorted her charge into the plane.

"Ah," responded Leonard. "Let's not make a habit of making your experiments your personal _tamagotchis_, Kaname-san." She ignored his comment and helped Kenji into one of the bucket seats.

"Are you all right? Do you think you need something for motion sickness or maybe a sedative?" she asked, feeling his clammy hand and resting her palm on his forehead. His temperature was back to normal but he looked a little nervous.

"No more drugs, please," he said quietly. Kaname nodded, understanding, and handed him a bottle of water. She went back to Leonard, still standing at the open hatch. A look of amusement crossed his face as he stared out towards the Ice Cube. Kaname looked outside and her heart almost stopped.

Several familiar arm slaves were closing in on them, coming out from behind the Cube. They were Mithril's M9's and right behind what she assumed was Mao's unit was the Arbalest. She didn't have to guess who was piloting it. Her lips mouthed his name but she couldn't find her voice. Mithril's arms slaves were in the process of destroying the outer defenses of the Cube, and a nearby bunker of Amalgam's automatic laser sight defense mechanisms exploded. Several groups of Amalgam foot soldiers retreated to the helicopters that were waiting for them. Leonard looked at her with a soft grin.

"Nostalgic, isn't it?" he mused. "I feel the same way every time I see the Danaan."

Kaname dismissed his sarcasm. As the propellers of the Aethia picked up momentum, more swirls of ice and snow picked up around the craft. Kaname's long hair flew up and trailed off to one side, as she stood there unmoving, gripping the handle by the open hatch.

"Chidori-san," called out one of the crafts operators, raising his voice to a yell in order to be heard above the engines as he reached for the hatch's handle. "We must close the door!" She barely acknowledged what was being said to her, and didn't even register the noise. In her mind all was silent and in that moment before the hatch closed she knew that _he_ was looking directly at her.

Sousuke observed the propeller aircraft as it took off. His visual screen had picked out the contours of her face as he zoomed in. It had been a while since he had seen her but he would never forget the face he had ingrained into his memory. Kaname looked thinner and tired, but it was still her. In an instant, relief and longing washed over him and he had no words to describe it. Even if Bel or Mao had given the order to shoot them down, Sousuke would disobey because he couldn't move the Arbalest in that moment worth his life. His mind was locked in Kaname's sad expression and his body was grounded in his own sense of futility. She was leaving him again, and there was nothing he could do to prevent it.

Someone was calling his name.

"Sousuke, snap out of it," ordered Mao through their communications link. He blinked back into reality and looked over towards her.

"Go with Kurtz and secure the building," said Bel as he and Mao took one end of the perimeter, and two others went in the opposite direction. Dressed in warmer gear for the mission, he and Kurtz exited their arm slave units armed to the teeth and went inside.

Aside for a few die-hard guards who refused to leave their posts, there wasn't much resistance to their entry. They soon discovered that there wasn't much left inside the building that was worth confiscating and it was reported back to the Danaan over the com link. Here and there a few notes and charts had been left behind but the hardware, the test subjects and the personnel were all gone. Streams of water were flowing down the halls as the security systems of the Ice Cube had gone into "meltdown," a type of self-destruct method where the solar panels overloaded the collected energy at the power grid, which then distributed heat throughout the premises by way of wires and super charged heat rods to effectively melt the entire building down to nothing but slush in a matter of hours. What little could have been saved was already washing away in ice water.

"Sousuke," said Kurtz, indicating that he should follow. Sousuke turned the corner where Kurtz had disappeared, his boots sloshing in the icy water, and saw him standing in front of two doors. One of them had a metal plate attached to it that read, "K. Chidori."

"You search that one. I'll take this one," nodding towards the door that said "L. Tesstarossa."

Sousuke entered the room carefully, avoiding the flow of water that streamed out as he opened the door. The ceiling of the room had already caved in, not leaving much that wasn't bogged down by slush and water. On a shelf in the corner were various personal articles, among them, a familiar stuffed animal. Sousuke looked at Kaname's Bonta-kun bear blankly. Something stirred in his heart. To his surprise a swell of emotion surfaced and with one swing of his hand, Bonta-kun went flying. Sousuke coldly observed the stuffed bear floating face down. Scattered on the shelf where Bonta-kun had sat was a small pile of pictures. Sousuke picked them up and realized they were postcards. One was purchased at Narita airport in Japan. Another pictured the Falkland Isalands south of Argentina. Another was of Antarctica, featuring a cluster of penguins. Sousuke flipped through them one at a time. They were from towns in France, Russia, Germany, Switzerland, the Middle East, China and Australia. Were these all the places she had gone with Amalgam? Was she trying to tell him where their bases were located? Sousuke looked at Bonta-kun again. There was an opening in the seam on the side and the white corner was sticking out. He picked up the stuffed animal again and pulled out a folded up piece of paper. He took off his gloves and carefully flattened it. Sousuke's eyes widened as he looked over a blueprint schematic for Amalgam's latest creation, the _Avatara_, an arm slave far more advanced than the Codarl, and the schematic for direct uplink of the brain of its human pilot into its Lambda Driver. Everywhere there was blank space on the sheet were notes scribbled in Kaname's hand about frequencies and bandwidths that Sousuke did not understand. At the bottom of the sheet of paper was the small inscription, "_This will help you, Sousuke_."

* * *

Author's notes: Please R&R. Your enthusiasm, as always, makes me want to write more. Thanks to Lady-Rinoa, Langus, Obsequious101, Blackwolf581, Shichibukai, and sippingsodapop for all the encouraging words this month!

I don't know why, maybe nostalgia for Fumoffu, but I really wanted to use that Bonta-kun in her room. When I decided to make this story AU I knew what I wanted Kaname to do in Amalgam and I wanted it to be dark. She's grown up in the months that she's been away and you get the feeling that she's now in a dark world, where living and dying are about the same to her.

Yes, the _Avatara_ is my shameless Avatard fan plug. But in Hindu legend, an Avatar is a god incarnated into human form.

-Kero (8/30/08)


	11. Memento Mori

**Chapter 10: Memento Mori**

Sousuke pulled the collar of his black coat closer to his face. In hindsight a scarf would have been optimal, but he couldn't bring himself to touch the bluish-gray one hanging in his locker on the Danaan. Last Christmas Kaname had given that to him as a gift. Though she had made it seem like an afterthought of little significance, Ono-D had explained to him that it was an expensive name brand on the label and she most likely had spent some time saving up for it and picking it out. Her behavior had confused him at the time but it also warmed him. It was only a scarf; he knew that. It harbored no ill will, retained no memories and had no feelings. But when he shut his locker door he somehow thought it would be lonely in there, which was completely ridiculous. And for the same reason he couldn't bring himself to touch it, he found himself trekking alone in a foreign landscape looking for a girl he couldn't yet relinquish to Fate.

A bracing wind picked up his hair and blew snowflakes in his face. It was the first snowfall of the season in the little Russian village just south of Sochi. The sensation was welcome as it reminded him that he was still alive. Sousuke crossed the wide expanse of the M-27 highway quietly, the footfalls of his soft-soled leather shoes barely audible in the pre-dawn hours. His gloved hands were shoved into his pocket, along with a postcard from Sochi that Kaname had left at the lab in Antarctica.

A large dump truck approached and rumbled its way past him. He paused and looked at its markings, all in Russian. His youth in Kazakhstan had taught him many things; chief among them was a limited knowledge of the Russian language. It bore the markings of the company he was told to look for. After he returned from the Antarctica mission, he contacted Kaname's other "watcher," now reassigned to guard duty of a Mithril higher up. Partly because she was bored out of her mind and partly because she wanted Sousuke to find Kaname so she could give her a good thrashing, the Mithril intelligence operative did a little digging for him regarding the whereabouts of Amalgam in Sochi, Russia. This was after his leads in China, the Middle East and Australia had all led nowhere.

She found a connection between the local dump truck business and a French pharmaceutical company by the name of _Orpheus Pharmaceuticals, _which was in turn backed by a larger corporation, _Messud Internationale_. Messud was linked to Amalgam funding in the past and was a major holder of oil and energy stocks worldwide. It was a tentative link at best, but any link at all would drive Sousuke to the ends of the earth. Orpheus' headquarters were just south the coastal highway along the Russian countryside bordering the Black Sea, midway between Sochi and Achsjtyr. The dump truck company made regular pick-ups of bio hazardous waste and mechanical scrap from the laboratory on a weekly basis.

Sousuke followed the tracks left behind by the dump truck up an old country road. Along both sides were rows of trees that were losing their autumn hues and awaiting their winter death. His quiet surroundings mimicked his mood. Walking in the company of his own thoughts his mind turned to a familiar lovely face. His insides no longer ached when he thought of Kaname but an inexplicable gloom filled the fibers of his body and made him more numb than the chilled Russian wind ever could. He understood that perhaps Amalgam had threatened her with violence on her loved ones and friends. He understood that it was most likely a very difficult decision she had to make since it meant leaving the comfortable shell of her old existence. But what he couldn't accept, or perhaps refused to, was that she had left without telling him; that she couldn't trust him enough to protect her.

As he approached the top of the hill he could see the roof of the four-story white building ahead. The building itself was architecturally sophisticated, taking the shape of a sine wave with a tall, clear cylindrical glass elevator shaft on each end. It was almost entirely covered with a reflective blue glass in the form of windows and gave off an eerie glow as the sun started to rise. The grounds surrounding the building were immense, walled and gated, with barbed wire and 'no trespassing' signs in Russian lining its perimeter every fifty feet. Sousuke crouched down behind a large rock and a tall bush off the side of the road and watched several trucks come in and out of the main gate over the next two hours. A pair of armed guards would come around the front every fifteen minutes. At the top of each hour, he observed, the guard shift would change.

As Sousuke was pondering how he would get inside he suddenly heard a twig snap behind him. He spun round and crouched on his haunches, simultaneously reaching for his sidearm and took aim when he stopped short at the flash of long blonde hair.

"Kurtz?" he asked, pointing his standard issue Glock handgun upward as he clicked the safety latch back on. Kurtz took off his motorcycle helmet and beamed at Sousuke. Mao's head peeped out right behind him and she gave Sousuke a thumbs up sign with an equally large grin.

"Hey Sousuke, fancy meeting you here," said Kurtz rather pointlessly. Mao dug an elbow in his side that sent the taller Caucasian man bowling over with pain. He gripped a hand over his mouth to remain silent as tears came to his eyes.

"Hey Sousuke, what's the plan?" she asked innocently.

"There isn't one yet. The Captain sent you here to follow me, didn't she?" asked Sousuke calmly. Mao only shrugged.

"Maybe she did. Regardless, we're here to assist you and three heads are better than one. What's the situation?"

Just as the question was posed, the three ducked low as a silver Rolls Royce drove past them and pulled up to the gate. As it rolled to a stop, one of the back windows rolled down and Kaname partially stuck her head out and looked up to the gloomy morning sky. Her voice was distinctive and they overheard her telling the other passenger that the weather felt cold before the window slid back up into position. The driver swiped his card in front of the laser scanner on the right and the gate opened with a subtle 'clank.' The car climbed the slight incline of the gravel road and delivered its guests to the double doors of the building.

"I'm breaking in and I'm going to take Kaname back," said Sousuke resolutely.

"'Kaname,' now, is it?" asked Mao. She sighed with concern. "You're getting too emotionally involved in this, Sousuke."

"I haven't felt any emotions in a long time," he replied.

"Maybe that's the problem. Maybe you should just let this one go. Kaname made her own decision, didn't she? We'll report back to Tessa and she'll figure something out. We can't take them all on in there. We don't even have a schematic of the layout inside. How are we—" she began. Sousuke shook his head in frustration.

"No one asked you to follow me. By all accounts I'm on vacation and what I do on my own time is my own business."

"No way in hell we're letting you go in there alone to kill yourself," smiled Kurz. "You may not value your life right now, but we still do. Mao is just concerned. I'm backing you though, buddy, because I don't think Kaname's happy where she is. She's just waiting for someone to give her a reason to leave." As he spoke, Mao lifted her communicator watch and spoke into it.

"Uruzu 2 to TDD-1. Come in, TDD-1." A short scattering of static gave way to the Captain's gentle voice.

"TDD-1 here. Uruzu 2 report."

"Uruzu 2 and Uruzu 6 have located Uruzu 7 as well as Angel. Target is located south of Sochi, bearing 2-9-7 at Orpheus Pharmaceuticals. Awaiting further orders. Repeat, awaiting further orders," said Mao quietly into her wrist.

There was a pause. "Will Uruzu 7 return to TDD-1 for further orders?"

"Negative," replied Mao.

"Do not engage the enemy, Uruzu 2. We are presently working on deciphering the message that Angel left in Antarctica. Repeat, do not engage the enemy. Retrieve Angel by 0800 hrs. Please enter your coordinates and turn on your homing beacon."

"Roger, TDD-1." Mao entered their present coordinates and closed her communicator. She looked at her two companions thoughtfully. "You heard what she said, Sousuke, although I doubt you will be completely adhering to that command. You have an hour and a half."

"There is a rotation of guards at the top every hour. There are no cameras in the corner to the right. I was planning on confiscating one of the uniforms—" Sousuke began when Mao held up a hand to silence him. She glanced at her watch and looked over the hedge to where a pair of guards were just coming out of the gate to take over the next shift.

"Sousuke," was all she said before she lunged out of their hiding place at full speed, a sharp throwing knife in each hand. Before the two guards could react, she gracefully threw her first blade into the leg of one of the armed guards before he even had a chance to call out. As the pain sent him to his knees Mao punched him unconscious. Sousuke was right behind her like her shadow and just as the first guard was falling, a swift kick sent the other guard's weapon flying upward and he spun around quickly in the same rotation kicking in his opponent's face. The other guard was unconscious before he hit the ground. Sousuke caught the second guard's weapon as it came back down to earth. Kurz whistled at their efficiency as he came forward with some rope.

"Remind me to always stay on your good side," he commented.

Kurz stayed behind with their getaway motorcycle armed with his sniper rifle to assist if Sousuke or Mao needed him. Mao had conveniently reminded Kurz how awful his hand to hand combat was which led to her decision that he would be their back up. As for Sousuke and Mao, they wore their guard hats low to cover their faces and in Russian, exchanged a few words with the guards who were leaving their shift. When no one was looking, they quickly headed inside using the key cards located in the uniform pockets to access the guard entry at one side of the building. Luckily for them, there were quite a few uniformed guards, doctors and scientists in white lab coats milling about so they blended quite nicely with the crowd. Even more convenient, a large, hammered steel and metal map of the layout of every floor with a description in Russian of the uses of each floor in different colors was posted on the center wall of the first floor. Sousuke ventured a guess that Kaname would be in the "testing and development" floor, which was the first floor adjacent to an arena behind the building, for testing arm slaves. Mao indicated there was a possibility that she was on the blue "research floor," which was the second to last floor. To save time, they split up in search of her.

Sousuke slid his key card to open the double glass doors labeled as "testing and development" at the far end of the main hall. He kept his face expressionless as he passed the guard seated behind a desk on the other side and nodded slightly. The other guard, older and more rotund, barely acknowledged him and continued to read his morning paper. The space he entered barely had any solid walls. Thick double paned glass panels and glass doors with silver handles divided the rooms. In each room a piece of heavy machinery or prototype device hung suspended from the ceiling or was propped on a lab table with various personnel in white lab coats and clipboards milling about taking computer readings and scribbling their notes down. No one seemed to heed the armed security guard passing by. At the far end of this section was a concrete wall and a heavy metal door labeled "arena." Since Kaname was nowhere to be found on this floor, he intended to check the arena and then rejoin Mao.

He slid his key card through the door lock but instead of a green light, he saw a red one. He tried again and the lock started to beep and the keypad next to it started blinking. Sousuke surmised that regular guards had no access to this section and he may have in fact triggered an alarm by sliding his card twice. At this point, he started to sweat and as he turned to exit back the way he came Sousuke bumped into someone unexpectedly.

"What are you--" began the tall, platinum blond Caucasian man when he stopped short.

"I spy a little fly in my eye," Leonard said with a sly smile. "I've told them time and time again that security at this lab needed to be doubled. But, do they listen? No." He pursed his lips thoughtfully and waived Sousuke to one side. "Let's just get this over with, Sagara-san, if you really must to see her _that_ badly…." Leonard punched in a code and the keypad stopped beeping and the metal door opened with a hollow groan.

Meanwhile, Mao, who had quietly snuck past the guard posted at the elevator doors and a gaggle of female scientists on their way to a cigarette break, opened an unmarked door on the eighth floor and peeked inside. As luck would have it, she saw a familiar hair bow and tall figure of a girl she knew. Before Mao could call out to her, a lab assistant was startled by the presence of an armed security guard in a place where she should not be. A beaker the assistant had been holding slipped out of her hand and shattered on the linoleum floor. All eyes then turned to the stranger in the room.

"Melissa," said Kaname in shock. Suddenly an alarm sounded. Kaname looked over to the lab assistant who had dropped the beaker. One hand was tucked under a lab table where an alarm button could be triggered for whatever reason. Before Kaname could give warning, an astral barged in through the door, nearly knocking Mao off her feet. She regained her balance and in one half turn drew her weapon, aimed and shot off two rounds. As if reading her every movement, the Astral raised a forearm and blocked both shots. One of the bullets ricocheted into a cabinet and shattered the glass front. The assistants started to scream and panic and they started for the door. As they exited the astral's sensor picked up the image of their retinas and scanned them until it read Mao's unfamiliar eye scan. Identifying her as the intruder, it charged forward, avoiding all three shots Mao fired next with its incredible speed and agility. All the lab assistants screamed and ducked their heads away from the stray bullets and flying shards of glass. With one swing of its metal arm Mao went flying into a glass cabinet on the far side of the room.

Mao gasped from the pain and her unsteady hand took aim at her opponent once more. Her own blood made the trigger slippery. Just as she was about to shoot, Kaname stood between her and the astral. The robot scanned Kaname's eyes and acknowledged her.

"Miss Chidori," it said in a mechanical voice. "Step aside, please."

"Run, Mao," said Kaname calmly, arms spread eagle to shield her from the astral.

"Kaname—" began Mao.

"I said run!" Kaname screamed. "It will break you in half if you don't!"

"Shit," cursed Mao as stood up and took Kaname in a headlock with her gun cocked at the ready. Kaname gasped at the sudden pressure against her throat.

"One move and she's dead," warned Mao. The astral's visor scan blinked red but it did not move.

"Sorry Kaname-chan," said Mao quietly.

"It's ok," breathed Kaname. With a heavy shove she pushed Kaname into the astral and took off in the opposite direction. The astral caught Kaname before she reached the ground and politely set her aside. Then it leaped away immediately in a sprint after Mao.

Mao had already raced past the startled lab technicians in the hall and made it all the way to the elevator. Just as the doors were closing, the astral opened fire as it charged forward and lodged several bullets into the elevator door. Just as the astral reached out to keep the doors open a shot pierced the nearest window and struck it in the head. The weight of the blow pushed the astral to one side, allowing the elevator doors to close.

"Took you long enough, Kurz," panted Mao as she descended to the first floor where she was sure the guards were waiting for her.

000

"Isn't she beautiful?" asked Leonard with pride in his voice. Sousuke beheld a slender and aerodynamically designed armed slave in the center of the testing arena that knelt on bended knee with a fist to the floor and the other in its lap. Its head stylistically resembled the Codarl with its long white mane streaming out behind it. On its back large exhaust modules were tucked in like a pair of metallic wings. The visor glowed green and its head tilted to one side as it observed Sousuke at the arena's entrance. The movement, observed Sousuke, was very human.

"It's our brainchild, mine and Kaname-san's. The Avatara is directly connected to its human pilot's brainwaves so its movement is entirely in synch with the operator's thoughts. It moves faster and lighter than any AS in existence. Would you care to test that statement?" dared Leonard.

"What do I get out of it?" asked Sousuke.

"The satisfaction of defeating me, the one who took your muse from you. If you can defeat us in this match, I will relinquish Kaname to you," smiled Leonard. "No strings attached."

"Then I won't lose," responded Sousuke.

"Confident, aren't we?" Just as the two were glaring at one another a loud bag came from the arena's entrance and Mao tumbled out of the building. Several astrals were chasing her but with a hand from Leonard all went still. Mao panted as she fell to the ground on her hands and knees. The blood running from her side suggested that a bullet had grazed her. She turned to Sousuke and grinned.

A sudden, erratic movement from the AS interrupted them all. "I won't let you take Kaname _onee-san_," said the voice of a young boy from within the Avatara on its loudspeaker.

Sousuke glared at the machine, wondering who its pilot was. Leonard raised an arm to tell the giant AS to remain at ease.

"Kenji-kun," said Leonard with an authoritative look that told the boy to keep silent when adults were speaking. But Kenji would not be obedient today. He raised the AS' cannon and aimed it towards Sousuke. The electromagnetic cannon buzzed and whirred as it began to charge.

"Kenji!" shouted Leonard. Before Leonard could reach for the access control panel still connected through a series of wiring to the _Avatara_, his two personal human-sized armed slaves, anticipating the danger, flanked him on both sides and he was speedily whisked up twenty feet in the air. Just as they rescued Leonard, Kenji pulled the trigger and a an enormous pulse of hot, bluish-white light exploded upon impact with the ground. The impact immediately absorbed all the sound in the surrounding area. Mao plunged behind a low stone barrier to avoid the outward burst of hot smoke and flame. Sousuke jumped back, but not far enough to dodge the entire inferno. He could smell the singe of the rubber soles of his shoes, his hair, and even his skin. In the split second between the time he was on the ground and when he was tossed into the air he immediately held his breath just as his nasal passage started to burn to prevent further tissue damage in his lungs as the burning debris and smoke engulfed him.

"Sousuke," mouthed Kaname with her lips as she suddenly lost her voice. Her palms were pressed firmly against the thick, double paned glass window separating her from the heat of the explosion. Tears welled up in her eyes as the window shuddered.

She had been staunchly against Kenji being entered into the training program for the Avatara because his surgical procedure had not been entirely successful and he was not able to control the Lambda Driver in the AS. Against her wishes, Leonard had enrolled Kenji along with the other test subjects into the training program. Though Kenji excelled in the simulations, he was exhibiting some after effects that caused instability in his mental faculties. Kaname clenched her teeth as her knees gave way and she crumpled onto the floor. The sweat in her palms streaked downward along the glass' smooth surface as she slid down, still feeling the heat of the explosion against the glass. Her head whirled in thoughts of despair. If her own creation had killed the one she cared for the most, there was only one thing left for her to do.

000

Sousuke found the string of his consciousness once more. It had eluded him so many times that he was wondering if he would ever catch it again. He felt like a cat trying to grasp the end of a ball of yarn that kept on wriggling out of its paws. This time, he clung to it, knowing that if he lost it again, he would have to face the black abyss behind him and he would drown in it this time. There was something sinister about that abyss. It was like a black door and behind it he wondered if oblivion, or Hell, or both waited for him.

He opened his eyes, and the light in the room stung his irises. With this movement that proved he was still among the living his whole body started to protest, as if it too remembered that it was alive. There wasn't a spot on his body that didn't ache or burn. Sousuke felt as though he had walked the deserts in Kazakhstan twice over without water. He turned his head to one side and saw an angel staring back at him. He blinked and realized it was not Kaname.

"Sagara-san, can you hear me?" asked Teletha timidly.

He nodded and said, "Captain," in a hoarse voice. It was so thick and drugged that he needed a moment to register that it was his own.

"Thank goodness Mao sent your coordinates to us on time. We sent two retrieval units who successfully claimed the three of you back in the confusion after the explosion," she said gratefully. She paused for a moment to add, "We were not able to retrieve _her _at the time as your injuries were the most pressing. You have been out for nearly two weeks." Her words surprised him. Sousuke could still smell his burnt hair as if it had happened a moment ago. He lifted a weak unsteady hand to his head and to his shock realized that a portion of his hair had been shaved off. Though he had never cared about his looks before and he would never see his classmates again, he nevertheless felt a little self-conscious.

"You're lucky to come back alive," sighed Teletha. She fought hard to suppress the anger in her voice and the tears in her eyes. "You should stop, Sagara-san. You've done enough."

He inhaled a deep breath and let it out calmly. Kaname's smiling face flashed across his mind and its warmth beckoned him towards insanity. Her smile was the only home he had ever needed so fervently. "But I'm not dead yet," he responded. "And I promised her…" His voice faded in his own ears as he lost consciousness again. The last things he heard were the erratic beating of his heart monitor suddenly changing to a whiny monotone and the captain's frantic voice crying out for the medic.

* * *

Author's Note: Wouldn't it be funny if I just killed him off here? I'm sorry it took so long to churn this out. My life has been crazy lately. Finally, a chapter that's from Sousuke's point of view. I thought I needed to get out of Kaname's head, but when I got into his head, it felt a lot darker in there…I wanted to convey the sense that Kaname and Sousuke live in the same gritty, disenchanted world now, and the only thing that gives them hope and keeps them alive is their feelings. _Memento Mori_: literally means in Latin "remember death," or remember your own mortality. It's also one of my favorite movies.

-Kero (10/29/08)


	12. Long Kiss Goodbye

**Long Kiss Goodbye**

Mao let out a slow breath as a single drop of sweat rolled down her left cheek. In the cockpit of her M-9, various lights blinked and flashed across the screens around her relaying information about her position, her machinery's status and her target's location. She gripped the controls and closed her eyes. Outside, the hard blue summer sky carried out the sun's exuberant rays as Meridia Island experienced one of its record highs of the season. She tuned out the sounds of chirping birds and bugs on her sound speaker and waited patiently amidst the rhythmic beat of her heart.

Suddenly the bells and whistles of her sensors blared at her. Her opponent appeared out of nowhere was coming from behind with incredible speed. But she was ready for him. Even as the Arbalest's anti-tank dagger sloped downward to slice her in half, her M-9 was sidestepping. Its torso twisted forty-five degrees and she caught the Arbalest's arm just in time. The dagger barely nicked the paint of the M-9's helmet before Mao pushed upward. Counting on Sousuke to lose his balance one of the M-9's legs swing around in the same motion to kick him down. Before she made contact, however, Sousuke's Arbalest leaped back and her M-9's foot only caught air.

"You're moves are too predictable, Sousuke. They're practically out of the manual. I thought you wanted me to train with you, not _play_ with you," she said mockingly. Before she could catch another glimpse of him on her monitor, the Arbalest vanished. Out of the jungle brush from a completely different direction Mao heard a pop and a three-pronged metal claw whizzed past the M-9's head. Reflexively she held out a hand to shield herself. As her arm caught the wire the claw changed it's trajectory and the metallic rope wound itself around her arm and neck. Before she could figure out that he had shot out his wire gun, the metal rope caught her AS's neck and she was falling backward from a sudden pull down. Sousuke had recalled the wire and with a tight fisted grip of the rope that caught at the base of the M-9's head, he forced her down. Immediately as her AS made contact with the coffee colored dirt, the Arbalest twisted around as if to elbow the M-9 in the chest while still holding its lasso to the ground. He stopped his machine at the last moment and as the dust cleared, the two giants lying on the ground looked like immobile metal statues. Realizing the commotion was over the birds and bugs recommenced their afternoon melodic suite.

"Well done," smiled Mao as she took off her helmet in the cockpit and leaned her head back against the pilot's seat headrest with a relieved sigh. "You pass."

The two had been training rigorously for nearly half a year after Sousuke's recovery period after the Russian "incident." She knew he would not relent until he took Kaname-san back again, or died trying. As his superior officer and friend, she understood the passion that drove him. Though she would much rather he didn't throw away his life for such a silly thing like "love," she wanted to make sure he was prepared to face the end. While time passed on the island, Amalgam had again withdrawn into the shadows and the world was quiet and peaceful for the time being.

Sousuke moved his AS into a kneeling position and opened the cockpit. The sweat against his tank top cooled as a light breeze picked up. He would ask the Captain to return him to active duty. Mao could vouch for him. He wanted to return to the world where Kaname was, and he was determined to save her from them and from herself. There was nothing else he lived for. No matter what, he would keep his promise and continue to believe in her. Deep down he knew that Kaname would always be Kaname, no matter what.

With a hand held up to his eyes to take some of the sharp glare away from the sun, he studied the deep blue atmosphere above. There hadn't been any rain for weeks—not even the humid summer downpours. His thoughts wandered in time and space to a place near Jindai High School, where quaint little shops and stone streets stood charmingly frozen in a picture in his mind of another summer now past. Kaname had asked him to go with her to try out a dessert and parfait shop there. He remembered their arms almost touching as they walked side by side in their summer uniforms. Because she had told him he was often too quiet and sullen, he thought to commence quaint conversation and commented on the summer sky and the lack of rain.

"_Without rain, there are no rainbows," _she had said. Sousuke could almost hear her voice on the breeze. Nowadays, his heart no longer ached when he thought of her. Instead, that pain was replaced by twinges of sadness he would feel from time to time. Sometimes he wished his mind wouldn't remember things like that so clearly.

The pair returned their AS's to the hangar in silence. Mao patted him on the back as she would her little brother and walked alongside him towards the main building. She was working out a kink in her shoulder that resulted from her being so rudely forced to the ground when she noticed a familiar petite figure standing to the side of the main entrance. She grinned at their commanding officer.

"Well, I guess I'll go make Kurtz do push-ups in the sun again," she said out of the blue. Teletha looked at her quizzically as she waved goodbye absently over her shoulder and walked away.

"He's no doubt doing something perverted right now. It's my job to discipline my subordinates." She stretched lazily as she turned the corner of the building and disappeared around the back.

Teletha handed Sousuke a towel, which he took gratefully. They walked through the sliding double doors into the suddenly dark hallway. The glare from the outside sun made it difficult for their vision to immediately adjust. Out of habit and familiarity he walked sightlessly to the vending machines ahead without having to really see where he was going and she followed blindly after him.

He pulled several coins from his pocket and slipped them into the slot and pushed the button for an energy drink. Wordlessly, he also pushed the button for the milk flavored bubbly beverage the captain always purchased from there, no matter how long she spent pondering the choices.

"Thank you," she said as she took the offering. She watched him take a sip of his drink before she had any of hers.

"Melissa tells me that you want to be reinstated into active duty," she said after a while.

"Yeah," he responded, finishing the rest of his drink. He looked at her and smiled a little. "The sooner the better."

"I understand," she said and took another sip. She accidentally took a bigger sip than she originally planned and turned a shade of pink as she gulped it down. It would be embarrassing if she choked in front of him. Mortified of the thought, she quickly regained her composure.

"Is there a problem, Captain?" he asked gently.

"No," she said and looked away. "I just thought…" she let her voice trail away into the dark corridor.

"Would you rather I didn't return to active duty?" he surmised.

"You'd find a way to act even without my permission," she answered. "I just wish there was a way I could help you more."

"You _do_ help me a great deal, Captain. You've always been a great support to me."

Teletha looked at him with wide eyes and her heart jumped a little. "I just wish you wouldn't be so reckless with your life. Every time you go out there I wonder…"

"You wonder what?" he asked, looking puzzled.

"I wonder what I could have done to make you stay." Her voice was almost a whisper and a rosy flush came to her cheeks.

"Captain," he began.

"Please don't!" she cried out. Before he said another word her arms were wrapped tightly around his waist and her face was buried in his chest. "Please don't humor me. I know you've already made your choice." Sousuke was a little surprised at her boldness, but he placed his hands on her shoulders to comfort her. They stood like that for a little while, as the corridor remained empty. As she held him, she breathed in his scent, determined to remember it forever—not knowing when she would have a chance to do this again. No, she wouldn't let herself do this again. This would be the last time she acted so foolishly over him. She composed her facial expression and pulled away from him slowly, lingering in the embrace.

"Good luck to you, Sergeant Sagara. I will support you as far as I can."

He looked at her and wondered at the strength behind her petite frame. "Thank you, Captain. I will always appreciate your friendship."

"Then you shall always have it," she responded with a warm smile.

000

In the side streets of the Piazza Malta in the heart of Rome the pedestrians and the passers by were starting to dwindle in number as the sun was going down. No one took serious notice of the several expensive looking cars carrying their passengers down the stone streets towards an immaculate white building, inconspicuous among a city of fine architecture. The building was labeled the _Camera di Commercio Industria Artigianato e Agricoltira_. Its smooth cut stone masonry facade was saturated in the style of the Italian Renaissance. The courses, moldings and all decorative detail were carved with great precision. Its windows, mimicking the orange gleam of the sky, were paired and set within semi-circular arches and triangular shaped accents at their tops. Ornately carved buttresses sat atop the slender roman columns along the front of the building. There were no sentries, no guards and no people otherwise seen in any of the windows. Aside from those who claimed membership there, there was no one in the vast, old city who knew that this was Amalgam's headquarters, nicknamed the Aerie.

Kaname leaned against the frame of the balcony door to her room facing west, in the direction of the sunset. She barely noticed the play of hues over the colorful tiled roofs of the city that was a common sight for her nowadays since they had relocated. She recalled the conversation she had with Kenji the night prior with chagrin.

"_Kaname-san, I'm really sorry,_" he had apologized. She had only looked at him listlessly. After the explosion in Russia Kaname didn't have very much more to say to him. Though she had been a lot like an older sister to him, she had found her feelings suddenly turn cold in the aftermath of his little rampage. Though he had only thought of her when he killed Sousuke, Kaname couldn't find it in her to forgive him. How many times had she tried to teach him that life was precious? How could he do such a thing? Had he lost a part of himself while he was incarcerated in his experimental glass jar? Kaname couldn't help but feel that somehow it was her fault. She had mourned for many weeks prior to even being able to look at Kenji again. Leonard had expressed his concern for Kenji's inability to train properly while his mind was so troubled over Kaname, but she didn't care. The less he trained, the better.

"_Do you regret_ _setting me free_?" he had asked quietly in her room. She looked at him and understood that he would not be able to bear it if she said she did. She was not so heartless as to admit it aloud, but she said nothing to comfort him.

After a while, she had asked him, "_Why are you here? What is it you want from me_?"

"_You're the only one I have in the world. I want you to love me_." His words were honest and his intentions pure. For a moment she stared at the boy's earnest eyes. Before she could fathom what he meant by "love" he reached over and pressed his cheek against her breasts. Though she wanted to push him away, she didn't have the strength to. She merely looked away. Kenji looked up and his eyes pleaded with her to hold him.

"_I cannot be what you want, Kenji. I don't know what you have suffered in the past before we met, but it's better that you start witn a clean slate now. I only want you away from here…away from me. I want you to live outside of the glass cage like a normal boy_." She looked down and patted his head in a rather motherly way. Just as her own mother used to do. "_When my mother died in a car accident and I had survived it, my father blamed me. I thought I was all alone. But then I made friends again and I met _him. _My life was so much richer for that._ _That's what I want for you, but I have none of that to offer you. From this point forward, I am walking in a direction towards a destination I must reach alone_." She only looked at him sadly.

Without another word, he left. She didn't know where he went, but he climbed down her balcony and walked away into the night without explanation. She would always remember the look he gave her when she watched him quietly go. It was a mixture of relief, sadness and release. Perhaps he had thought himself bound to her, because she was the only one who was kind to him and had spared his life on a whim. Perhaps he had even fallen in love with her. The last thing she wanted was for him to share in her nightmare. Also, with him gone, she wouldn't have to forgive him.

Just then, there was a slight knock on her door. She turned to see Leonard poking his head into her room.

"May I join you, Kaname-san?" he asked in his usual, sweet voice.

"I can't stop you," she answered, and turned her gaze back towards the view from her balcony.

"Ah, I love Rome, the city of my birth. And Teletha's as well for that matter. It's so appropriate for us to have finished our joint project here in the land of myth and ancient gods. I feel as though we've just set the stage for a grand spectacle on a worldwide scale on this hallowed ground. I just wish I wasn't now pent up here with nothing to do." The agitation in his voice subsided as he sidled up next to her and took a lock of her hair into his hands and inhaled deeply. On cue, she turned around with lightning speed and an open palm to strike him. He caught her wrist gingerly and smiled apologetically.

"I see your grief hasn't stopped you from being feisty."

"My grief is none of your business," she stated flatly, turning away from him.

"I can never leave a grieving woman alone. I was actually hoping that I could let you use my body to comfort you in your time of need."

"Pass," she responded curtly. He sighed. "The higher ups for Amalgam are downstairs planning an all out attack on Mithril to end it once and for all. I'm only their technical genius. Strategy games bore me." He set himself down gracefully on her golden upholstered sofa and kicked off some of the fluffy tasseled pillows to make room for his feet. With his head resting against one end he looked up at the wooden ceiling and began to snack on the fresh fruit in the bowl he had swiped from the side table. His long platinum locks hung over the side lazily in the dying sunlight. For a moment, she marveled how he resembled a beautiful portrait. "I suppose our forces from our various locations, such Russia, Hong Kong, South America, Antarctica, the Philippines, Saudi Arabia, Haiti will have to strike separately. An Amalgam double agents has informed us that there's to be some kind of summit meeting among Mithril's high ranking officers on Meridia Island. It may include the illustrious and illusive Lord Mallory. As I understood the bulletin this morning, all fighting personnel and trainees from our European bases are to report to the meeting hall for debriefing a quarter before midnight tonight. I suppose that means me, since I can pilot an AS. You're a natural as well. I don't suppose you'd want to come along?" he asked nonchalantly, as if he were asking her to go with him to a picnic.

"I don't like the smell of the interior cockpit of an AS. It's too stifling."

"All the better, I suppose," he replied. "I'm not sure how I feel about killing my old mentor, Mallory."

"And your sister for that matter," added Kaname quietly. He fell silent for a moment and then heaved a sigh.

"If they want to succeed all of our forces that can be spared should head to Meridia Island. Not a soldier less. If we leave via mass submarine transport by midnight, the fighting could commence within 48 hours. I guess Elanna eventually became of use to us." He absently continued to chew on a cluster of grapes. Kaname wanted to smack him. His lounging figure reminded her of Bacchus, suckling his grapes and not caring about the mortal world. Leonard was a demi-god in his own head and in his own eyes he could do no wrong.

Aside from Kaname herself, she wondered if he ever thought highly of any other Whispered. He always talked with disdain about his younger sister and had no respect for the Whispered who couldn't control their gifts, such as Elanna. She had been captured in Russia and was one of the first to be tested upon. Much like Teletha, she had vast submarine technology buried within her mind. The attack would most likely utilize her one and only creation, Leviathan; a huge submarine that rivaled the Tuatha de Danaan in both stealth and speed. It was the size of a small city. Kaname heard that Elanna was rescued by Mithril, but subsequently hung herself to stop the voices.

As the key researcher in the Avatara Project it was likely that Kaname was needed to monitor and study the results of using their newly created platoon of fantastic and deadly winged Armed Slaves. Even as the sun was setting, she was formulating her plan. For herself, for Sousuke who tried to save her, she would end it one way or another.

Leonard got up and walked over to her, gently offering a grape to her lips. He smiled kindly and waited patiently for her to open her mouth. She looked away but he caught her chin with a thumb and forefinger and pressed the grape to her lips. As Kaname's lips parted he replaced the grape with his mouth and kissed her deeply. She was too emotionally exhausted to resist. She was determined that this was the last time he would steal a kiss from her. As he pulled away and looked at her quizzically, as if to ask permission to do more, he was disappointed to meet her dead gaze and emotionless countenance. He dropped his hand and sighed.

"It would give me great pleasure to have you accompany me for dinner tonight," he said softly. "I will do everything in my power to make you happy tonight."

"My happiness is unnecessary," she replied coldly and looked away. "But dinner would be fine."

In a way, she had to thank Leonard for showing her what she could be, pulling all the stops of what was right, what was moral, what was socially acceptable in order to find out the meaning of the secrets inside of her. Knowing what she now knew, having done what she had done, Kaname realized she could not return to normal society. The picturesque scene beyond her balcony was nothing more than a poor, plain shadow of her reality.

As she moved out to the balcony and place a hand over the stone rail decorated with twisted vines of bougainvillea he moved over to place his hand over hers. But just as they touched a shock went through him as their eyes met. He suddenly couldn't breathe as he stared into the depths of her eyes. To his surprise, they were resonating. A familiar chanting wound around his consciousness as he started to drown in the visions, symbols and formulas that gushed forth like a massive reservoir. Leonard's eyes went wide as he caught a glimpse of the endless chasm of Black Technology in Kaname's head. He forced a break in their resonance by biting his own lip. Leonard breathed normally again and he could taste the blood in his mouth as he raised his handkerchief to his lips and finally looked away.

"Kaname-san you never cease to amaze me. You've been holding back on us," he smiled weakly.

"There is only one person I trusted in this world…and you will never replace him," she said quietly. He looked at her for a bit, his expression unreadable. She wondered how much of her personal thoughts he had seen in that second of resonance. Just then, there was another knock on the door. Simultaneously she and Leonard granted permission to enter.

"I'm sorry to interrupt Sir, Ma'am. I was told by Monsieur Dubois to let you know that all the members have arrived and dinner will be served shortly. Also, that a member of your new test unit was shot and killed while trying to escape the premises. Monsieur Dubois informs you to find a replacement pilot as soon as possible." The guard bowed politely and shut the door.

Kaname looked away to the sunset once more, resisting the urge to cry. Leonard placed a hand on her shoulder briefly, and then left the room. As the sun hovered right above the horizon, Kaname quietly sipped her sparkling Spumante _aperitivo_ on the glass table set out on her balcony, a practice emulated from Leonard.

"When in Rome…" said Kaname gently as she raised her glass to the sun. The rim twinkled in the light. As she blinked a single glittering tear rolled down her cheek in response. The simple sweet taste of her white wine reminded her of easier times—like those she had spent with Sousuke in high school. Those memories were so distant now. The perfect fishing spot on Meridia Island seemed etched in a far away time; and now Amalgam was going to destroy that as well.

Only her conviction to follow through with what she had mind kept her buoyed atop the swells of sadness that threatened to drown her. Kaname took another sip as the evening breeze blew against the pages of her notepad on the table. The pages flipped over with faint, crackling resistance. Therein, her scribbles and theorems, layouts of the Avatara's weaknesses jotted out in detail faded with the sun's departure. She had mapped out in pencil the intricate mechanism of wiring from the pilot's brain to the Lambda driver hidden deep within the impenetrable body of the beast connected underneath the massive and bendable wing-like appendages that operated as the exhaust for the power boost when the Lambda driver was activated. Constant cooling allowed lengthier periods of use and this was key. Leonard often compared the Avatara's strength and power to that of a demi-god. But how does one stop Amalgam's squad of demi-gods?

With determination burning bright in her eyes, Kaname plucked a blood red, wing-shaped bougainvillea petal from the vine.

* * *

Author's notes: You _knew_ I wasn't going to let anything happen to Sousuke…yet. Long Kiss Goodbye is a theme song to Naruto Shippuden that I really like. Thanks to all who RxR'd, especially the faithful Perpetual159, sippingsodapop, Langus, princessknit and Necat. You know I'd post regardless of whether any one reviewed it but I really do appreciate the reviews—love me or flame me. But I hope you all enjoyed it. Savor the flavor; I have no idea when I'm going to finish this story. – Kero (10/30/08)


	13. Sunrise, Sunset

**Chapter 13: Sun Rise, Sun Set**

"She wanted to go out with me," grinned Private DeLeon at his fellow watchtower sentry. Private Cruz rolled his eyes and shook his head in mock pity towards his fellow mercenary. Since they had joined Mithril a few years back, the two had become fast friends. After a stint of shore leave, the two found themselves again on sentry duty on Meridia Island.

"You wish," said Private Cruz dangling his binoculars from its strap like a pendulum. "You're just jealous she danced with me all night," laughed Private DeLeon. "When was the last time _you _got laid?"

"You couldn't even get laid in your own wet dream," smirked Private Cruz. "I saw her at the end of the night and the guy she left the bar with wasn't you." His friend fell silent. Private Cruz laughed turned around. "Didn't think I noticed, huh?" The grin on his face faded when he saw his buddy turn pale as a sheet as he stared into the morning mist and out to sea. Private Cruz followed his friend's line of sight out into the waves. Suddenly the mist parted and the sun broke through its barrier. As if on cue, the entire ocean's surface seemed to rise in height. The water gave way to an incredibly large object, the size of a small island and dark and smooth like the back of a whale. The surfacing of the large submarine sent tidal wave after tidal wave crashing onto the main beach of Meridia Island. The top hatch of the Leviathan creaked and opened, revealing a group of Armed Slaves neither of them had ever seen before, each genuflecting with a knee to the platform as it raised them up. Their sleek white bodies were curved and graceful. On their backs a pair of shiny silver appendages attached, gleaming in the morning light like metallic wings.

In a heartbeat they all stood up in unison, as if they were all controlled by the same mind. With incredible speed and agility they leaped from the submarine's hatch platform onto the white sand of the island. For a second Private Cruz forgot to breathe. He snapped out of his daze when his friend placed a hand on his shoulder to steady him. With a shaking hand, Private Cruz felt his way to a flashing red button. Just as one of the Avatara noticed their watchtower and took aim with its electromagnetic cannon he pushed the alarm button.

"They've activated the alarm, Sir," said a slim, dark haired woman aboard the bridge of Amalgam's massive transport submarine. "Team Silver is moving in to secure the beach and destroy the outer watchtowers. One, two, three towers confirmed destroyed." Monsieur Dubois, sitting regally in his captain's chair grinned and gripped his silver handled cane in his hand with tight anticipation. Whether they were warned or not would not make a difference. Expressionless, Kaname watched the operators at the communications panel give out orders to the armed personnel aboard the Leviathan to depart. Leonard was already on the island, leading the team of ten Avataras. After their vanguard secured the main beach, they would be followed by 100 astrals divided in four groups of twenty-five programmed to protect and support the 300 special ops soldiers divided in six groups of fifty who would beach via large transport boats launched from Leviathan's hull. Their mission was to secure the island as Amalgam took it over piece by piece. To accomplish that feat, a squad of twenty fully armed and flame-throwing Codarls would be deployed to burn down the jungle and take out the ground forces. While Mithril's effective M-9's were being distracted by the Avataras, four Behemoths would take down the guard towers, and building turrets, thus turning the Mithril command center to rubble and killing everyone inside. Their primary objective was to find the Mithril high-ranking officials and kill them, while the secondary objective was the destroy Mithril's fighting force. The third objective was to find and destroy the Tuatha de Danaan.

Kaname's forced the emotion from her heard. She knew some of the people on the Meridia Island base, like Mao, Kurtz, Kalinin and Tessa, and she wanted to spare them. She wanted to be the hero of the story once again but she didn't know if she had the courage to do it.

She only longed to be with _him_ again; to turn back time and find herself in one peaceful corner of the world reeling in fish by his side. An empty sadness filled her at the thought of heaven not existing and no place where she could find him again after today was done.

Monsieur Dubois noticed her standing quietly on the bridge and smiled at his latest protégée. He called her over to him.

"Why the sullen face, Miss Chidori?" he asked in perfect Japanese.

"I'm just worried my machines will be scratched. We spent a lot of time polishing them to make sure they shine," she responded with a little smile.

"Do not fear, Miss Chidori. With Leonard leading them, your subjects will return to you unscathed." Kaname noticed the proud gleam in his eyes as he spoke. This was most likely to be the crowning achievement in his term as head of Amalgam. Like Caesar accompanying his army, he insisted upon being present to witness the destruction of Mithril firsthand. She wondered if she was his Brutus. Several hours prior to reaching their destination Kaname had rigged her equipment, her on-board lab, and the spare machinery parts in the hangar with enough C-4 to take the ship down to the bottom of the sea, never to rise again. She had done it all under the guise of "checking" her equipment over the past four weeks that Amalgam was planning to move against Mithril. No one was the wiser as they were all preoccupied with the launching sequence of their forces onto the island. Kaname absently fingered the turquoise bracelet on her wrist. She had spent several days in her room in Rome applying the finishing touches to what on the surface seemed like an innocuous metal bracelet adorned with turquoise and blue shells but underneath which was the button that would trigger her remote detonators aboard the submarine as long as she was within a five mile radius of it. All she had to do was push a button. Kaname's fingers brushed against her bracelet thoughtfully.

"Sir," said the switchboard operator. "There is no sign of the Tuatha de Danaan on this side of the island."

"Playing hide and seek, is she?" smiled Monsieur Dubois. "No matter. Let's have a look around, shall we?" He picked at the lint underneath his finely manicured nails. Kaname looked away and listened to the radio babble on speaker.

"_B-1 and 2 moving into position."_

"B-3 and 4 hold your positions," ordered the clean-cut commander on the bridge as he moved his magnetic pins with a wooden stick onto a map of the island spread out before him. The operator relayed his message.

"_Squads A-1 through 4 standing by."_

"Move the foot soldiers into position," ordered the commander. The relay operator listed the coordinates of Mithril's facilities on the island to the radiomen among the armed Amalgam soldiers on the beach. They would take each of the buildings out in sequence. _"Fourth watchtower confirmed destroyed."_

"_Fifty meters to lock on Building 1 target."_

Suddenly, a loud explosion created a sharp pulse of static over the radio. The monitors along with wall of the command center indicated that the beach was now covered in smoke.

"Testarossa," said Monsieur Dubois sternly. "Status report." The edge of one side of his mouth was curled downward in agitation.

"_Silver squad has met up with the first wave of resistance. We are currently engaging the enemy,"_ said Leonard's voice over the radio.

"Are the AS pilots on foot?" inquired the commander.

"_Affirmative,"_ responded Leonard. _"They are heading to a rendezvous point through the jungle to attain their Arm Slaves. Most likely to meet with the Dannan."_

"Confirm the targets on screen and fire at will," ordered Monsieur Dubois. Another explosion interrupted the radio transmission and for a moment, all they heard was static. Kaname could fell her heart beating through her chest.

"Mr. Silver?" inquired the Commander with trepidation.

"_I'm all right. The Arbalest pilot is a resourceful little monkey."_

Kaname gripped the bridge's metal railing until her knuckles went white. Did he say _the Arbalest pilot_? There was only one Arbalest and there was only one person who could pilot it.

The sudden realization that Leonard had lied to her and the fact that Sousuke was still alive made her reel. The wheels in her head turned quickly as she charted a new plan of action. The sound of her teeth grinding made her snap back to the present. She resisted the urge to laugh aloud.

"Miss Chidori, where are you going?" asked Monsieur Dubois as she headed towards the bridge's exit.

"Back to my lab," she answered. He eyed her curiously with one brow lifted and gave a wave his hand as if to dismiss her.

000

As the explosions continued to go off all over the island Sousuke knew that Kalinin was effectively utilizing the fifty-five scattered sensor remote land mines all over the base. He was at the helm of the command center when Sousuke, Mao and Bel headed out for the Danaan.

"Sir, the heliport has been destroyed by the unidentified Armed Slaves," said the command center staffer in her matter-of-fact tone. The command post in the main building of Meridia Island was at the heart of the cluster of buildings on the island and the most heavily fortified. There were at least eleven staffers at the helm, monitoring the situation around the island and coordinating the defense efforts. It was decided that Mr. Kalinin was to be the most effective here, as the base was also hosting five high ranking Mithril Officials for a meeting, including Sir Mallory, their leader.

"How could they have known our location?" said one frantic communications relay officer.

"It was most likely leaked or there is a double agent," said Kalinin quietly. As if they needed another one of those. Already the wheels in his head were turning to ascertain the culprit. Defending the island was bad enough without wondering if you were going to a bullet in the brain from the back of the head. He was grateful that the Captain had stayed aboard the Danaan. The radio transmissions from all over the island filled the air waves.

"Meridia-1 come in. All 350 armed personnel are being dispersed into combat. Repeat. All 350 armed personnel are being dispersed."

"Initiating defense code sequence 2-0-0. Deploying all 20 special artillery armored tanks now," said one command center relay operator as she switched on interior alarm.

"_Position TG-5 secure,"_ said Kurz's voice over the speaker.

"Five of fifteen guard towers are down," confirmed another relay operator.

"Six of fifty-five remote land mines have detonated. All ground personnel are ordered to lead the enemy into the remaining land mines in zones A through F."

"TDD-1 has switched to red alert. The Captain wants to know when to expect her SRT personnel."

"We have to get to our AS units," said Bel.

"The Danaan can't wait for you for very long," said one of the radio operators. "Our sensors are picking up a very large submarine, likely their method of transport, heading in her direction. She'll have to take evasive maneuvers soon. Judging by the little information we have, it's like of the same class as the TDD-1."

"More Black Technology," muttered another operator. "They don't pull any stops when it comes to extensive and heavily funded research with human test subjects do they?"

"It will be size and artillery versus speed and superior tactics," said Kalinin. "The Captain will hold her own."

Kalinin knew that most likely Amalgam's research had surpassed that of Mithril's because of the latter organization's penchant for morality. It was more than likely that Mithril was both outnumbered and outclassed in this fight. Unfortunately, none of its neighboring bases were close enough to send assistance earlier than by sunset. They would have to last until then, or perish.

Kurz elected to stay on the roof of the main building to direct the five air-land-sea heavy artillery turret gun positions. As Mao had so bluntly put it in some of their earlier training sessions, his hand-to-hand combat and close range combat skills "sucked." He was heavily draped in chains of bullets with at least five of his favorite long range rifles and machine guns strapped to his back and chest. In times like these, Sousuke realized that having a "gun nut" for a friend was a handy thing. Kurz gave his regular easy going grin and a thumbs up sign as he watched his friends leave.

Sousuke couldn't worry about the command center now. His main goal was to survive the day, and save as many as he could. To do that, he needed Al. They had accidentally separated from the rest of Team 1 in the confusion, but all of them were very capable SRT operatives and all were armed to the teeth on their way out. Their only hindrance was time. Based on Kalinin's calculations they only had five minutes to get to the other side of the island to the Danaan, 3 miles away. The shortest route between the points would have been a straight line but for the land mines, enemy Astrals and foot soldiers closing in on them. The mysterious AV-Avataras were also on the hunt, which meant Sousuke and the others couldn't move so predictably.

As he was contemplating their next move while they were hiding behind a large volcanic rock he heard Mao's flying daggers whistle through the air. He turned to see as they sunk solidly into the necks of two approaching enemy soldiers. Bel quickly confiscated their equipment and ammunition to replace his own depleted supply. Two minutes left.

"One of us is going to have to be a diversion," stated Mao flatly. "Two Mithril Armed Slaves is better than none." Without another word, she gave out a lout battle cry and disappeared into the thick jungle brush. Several shots of gunfire and explosions followed her as she continued to sprint in the opposite direction. For a moment Sousuke felt a strange twinge in his chest at the thought of this being the last time he saw his closest comrades.

"I wish she wouldn't make such one-sided decisions like that. I mean, why bother telling us, then?" sighed Bel. They immediately picked up the pace again, heading for the rendezvous point with TDD-1.

Just then, another land mine, this time within yards of their position went off. For a moment Sousuke thought he was done for, but he soon realized that aside from his hearing, much of his faculties were intact. He and Bel both tumbled to the ground, Sousuke hitting sand and dirt with bits of plant in his mouth and Bel into the trunk of a palm tree. They both sat there dazed as the ground started to vibrate with the weight of a nearby AS. His team leader snapped back to his senses.

"Move, Sergeant! Move!" Sousuke heard above the ringing in his ears. Following that direct order, his limbs picked him up and he was again making a mad sprint to the finish, unaware that Bel was no longer with him. Just as he made it to the beach clearing on the other side of the island where the Danaan was docked Sousuke stopped short as he realized he was staring up the barrel of a large electromagnetic cannon. His eyes went wide and a single drop of sweat rolled down his cheek.

"_Not so fast, Sergeant Sagara_," said Leonard's voice from the cockpit of the AS. _Check, my friend,_ Leonard thought as his finger pressed the firing mechanism and his sensors locked onto his target.

"_Sousuke!"_

It was Kaname's voice. His attention diverted, Leonard's finger released the trigger mechanism as he eyed his monitors. Before he could turn around he was slammed from behind. The force of the contact sent his AS flying into a cluster of sturdy palm trees, which gave way with a collective snapping and crashing noise.

_Kaname-san!_ said Tessa's voice in Leonard's head.

A sudden rush of information came colliding into Leonard's that instant he realized that the three Whispered were in such close proximity to one another that they were all connected by resonance.

_Now, Tessa_.

I understand.

Suddenly Leonard's monitors went dark and the whirring sounds inside the cockpit were slowing as his AS was powering down by itself. The radio was pure static.

_Checkmate,_ thought Kaname.

Leonard pulled off his helmet and let his blonde locks fall to his shoulders. He pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose.

_This was your plan all along, wasn't it, Kaname-san?_ he thought.

_Yes,_ she answered gravely.

In that brief moment before he broke off the contact with her mind he saw that she did not care what happened to her after the day was done, though she was happy that Sousuke might survive it. In fact, it was her intention that everything she created with Black Technology would go up in flames with Amalgam and no Whispered would be left alive, which was all for the better. In her mind's eye she thought she had seen the downfall of Black Technology, and concluded their predecessors had destroyed each other with war and inadvertently brought peace to the world. There was only one logical conclusion in her mind: for there to be peace, the Whispered should not exist.

Leonard pulled out the connection cables from the helmet and tossed them aside. Gripping the controls firmly with both hands he closed his eyes and concentrated. Almost instantly, his operating system was back online and his monitors were one by one again up and running.

"Initiate Operator's Code Silver-1."

"_Code sequence accepted,_" said the voice of his machine's A.I. Leonard smiled. It had been a long time since he had fought the old-fashioned way. Kaname's hijacking with the help of TDD-1's frequency jamming pulse was ineffective when he was directly linked with his mind via resonance to the Lambda Driver. Much to his chagrin there were only two operating AV-Avataras now. Still, his admiration for Kaname was as strong as ever. In his arrogance he had lacked to foresight to see her motives, and now he was paying for it. It was a pity, though, that he had to kill her.

Meanwhile, aboard the TDD-1, Sousuke and a limping Bel made it to the Captain's bridge for further orders just before Mr. Mardukas was going to relay the order to depart. The Leviathan was coming onto the radar screens now and as a ship, the Danaan would not be able to dodge the first attack without help.

"Most of your team has already retrieved their AS's. Your leg…" said Tessa eyeing Bel's wounds a bloodstained streak stained his calf.

"There isn't time, Captain," said Bel.

"Report to the hangar immediately. I can buy you two minutes delay time. You will then initiate launch sequence D-3 and you will provide cover for Sir Mallory and the others to take off directly from the roof of the main building. Danaan will not be able to provide back up."

"Understood," they said simultaneously and saluted her.

"Good luck, then," said Tessa as she got up from the Captain's chair.

"Captain?" asked Mr. Mardukas quizzically.

"I'm going to Lady Chapel. Dana will need assistance." Just as she took a step forward, she stumbled. Sousuke caught her in time before she reached the ground.

"Captain!" shouted her bridge crew collectively. Her face when sheet white and she broke out into a sweat.

"Kaname…!" she managed to whisper as her eyes went wide.

* * *

Author's Note: I had no idea how to wage war, so I made it up as I went along…hehe. Large-scale battles are just really difficult for me to write. I always knew this is where I wanted to story to go, but man, it's hard. Seriously, this is the tip of the iceberg since I haven't even covered the Behemoth's yet! It's always fun though when the battles are for mutual annihilation. So that's the long anticipated double-double cross from Kaname, and a surprise interior double agent. (Shrugs) I don't know who that is yet. More to come! -Kero (11/7/08)


	14. Parade

**Chapter 14: Parade**

Ai no mune kogase sen no yume watare_  
Set your heart in love on fire, cross through a thousand dreams_

Juuoumujin kakete te ni tsukamu sekai_  
Run right and left through the world you hold in your hand_

Kumo ga chigirete hi ga mata ochite_  
The clouds scatter and the sun retreats_

Mikansei no pareedo de doko made mo_  
The incomplete parade goes everywhere_

Bouken kichijitsu shinpaku joushou meian souguu seimei souai...  
_Adventure, fortune, exhilaration, light/dark, encounters, life, love…_

-[Parade] by CHABA

* * *

She looked up at the dark streak of smoke billowing up from the jungle and blotting out the perfect blue sky. Mao wiped the blood off her face with her bare arm. Her miliatary style tank-top was speckled with her own blood from the open wound where a bullet had grazed the side of her head. It was only a flesh wound and the bleeding had already slowed. She was only one-hundred yards from her destination, the Danaan. The only thing that stood between her and her goal was a forty meter tall Behemoth.

_Shit._

When she rolled out of bed this morning, she woke with a funny crick in her neck. Whether it was from her odd angled sleeping position or from the weather, this symptom always marked the beginning of a bad day. The first time it had happened, her father had almost married her off to someone she didn't care for. The second time it happened, she was in Afghanistan escorting a foreign aid caravan when her truck broke down and they were suddenly ambushed by terrorists. The third time it happened was the day Sousuke crashed their vehicle and abandoned his post, something she would never have believed he'd do, in Hong Kong. And now, the fourth time it happened was this day. This was a very bad day, a parade of horribles one following after another, despite the fact that her daily horoscope had indicated, 'you will meet adventure and good fortune today.'

"My ass," muttered Mao under her breath. The Danaan was hidden under water by now in ECM mode, but her last radio communication with them told her that underwater scuba gear was waiting for her at the dock so she could get to her M9. Unfortunately, her first foolhardy encounter with a Behemoth had already caused her to bleed. She didn't know if she had enough luck to survive another head on dash through a Behemoth's legs. She was out of ammunition clips. She had lost her last throwing knife when an Amalgam foot soldier had tried to sneak up on her. That was the last thing he did in life. Mao wondered if trying to get to the Danaan would be the last thing _she'd_ do in life.

As she was pondering her next move as sudden crash in the jungle was followed by mechanical thuds approching her. Mao turned to see a blur of jungle plants and crashing metal rush past her and out into the clearing where the Behemoth stood. The Behemoth held its fire, however, due to the fact that the two warring arm slaves were two of Amalgam's own Avataras. A little confused, the Behemoth looked left and right at both and continued to refrain from firing at either.

"_I can't say that I wouldn't expect this from you, Angel," _said Leonard's voice on his arm slave's loudspeaker. "_But truthfully, I didn't think you had it in you."_ His Avatara charged at his opponent in a uick, sudden dash from one end of the clearing and halfway to its destination, leaped up gracefully into the air to swan dive with its electro-magnetic blade drawn. His opponent said nothing and stepped back at the last moment. Leonard made impact with the sandy beach, causing sand to spray up in all directions. Even Mao got a face full.

The other Avatara sprang up from its haunches and swift kicked Leonard to the right. Leonard blocked it just in time, and as if mimicking a perfect jujitsu move, caught his opponent's leg with both hands of his arm slave. Anticipating this move, his opponent twisted in mid air and brought up the other leg to kick Leonard's arms slave in the head. Leonard's grip loosened as his sensors blanked for a moment upon impact, and his opponent used his arm slave as a stepping point for a back flip, landing in a crouched position once more.

Mao marvelled at the agility of Amalgam's machinery. She had never seen machines move like humans before, except when she watched Sousuke fight. But this seemed to be on a different, more graceful level, like two dancers, or two acrobats, perfectly synchronized and each anticipating the others' moves. There was something awe inspiring about this fight.

"_I can't believe you'd chose him over me, Kaname-san,_" lamented Leonard.

_Kaname_? thought Mao to herself. _Kaname-chan's piloting that AS?_

"_You don't have a heart,_" said Kaname finally on her loudspeaker. They were not resonating as Kaname had blocked him and the voiced in her head from her consciousness. After Tessa had jammed the frequency of the brain chip in her experiemental pilots, all of the Avataras went off-line, save two. The two that were piloted by pure blooded _Whispered_ were still fully functional as they did not need any chemical or mechanical trigger to operate their Lambda Drivers.

The two had taken their battle away from the main fighting grounds and throughout it all maintained functional and constant operation of their Lambda Drivers, something that could not be achieved by artificial means or non-_Whispered_ pilots in Amalgam's studies. Each move was supported by the Lambda Driver, much as the Behemoth's Lambda Driver was always working to maintain its posture and balance despite its huge weight. For both Kaname and Leonard, it took great concentration and control to do it. But judging from the sound of Leonard's voice, Kaname could tell that he found their fight exhilarating.

Leonard had spent more time than Kaname mastering his _Whispered _abilities, and though Kaname hated to admit it, he was the better pilot. Kaname was new to her abilities, and it was taking all her concentration to keep the voices in her head at bay so she could focus on the fight. She refrained from speaking as much as possible, and beads of sweat tricked down her face from her brow under her helmet. She hated confined spaces and knew she would never have a career as a pilot like Sousuke. But to save the one she loved, it was worth the sacrifice. She had to stay strong.

Kaname suddenly lunged in front of the Behemoth and fired her cannon at the looming monster. As if on queue, the Behemoth fired back with all four 30mm machine guns at once, finally able to distinguish which target to attack. Kaname dodged gracefully as she dashed, leaped and lunged past Leonard. The machine gun fire spray then shot directly at Leonard, who raised his shield just in time. The bullets were absorbed into the shield and then suddently, and violently bounched back in the opposite direction as if rebounding from a sling shot. The bullets were now charged with energy from Leonard's Lambda Driver and shot through the Behemoth's armor in several places. While the Behemoth's pilot was again confused at being shot at by both Avataras now, Kaname saw her chance and fired her cannon once more into the monster's face. She charged the assault with her own Lambda Driver, and her single cannot shot took off the Behemoth's head. The giant faltered a little before falling backwards. Upon impact it sent a shower of sea water and sand into the air and the ground shook.

"_Mao-san! Go to your AS!_" shouted Kaname on her loudspeaker.

"Damn it. This is the second time you've saved me," cursed Mao under her breath. Mao got up from her hiding place and made a mad dash towards the docks.

"Kaname-chan, don't die!" shouted Mao over her shoulder before she dove into the water.

Just as Kaname had her guard down, Leonard attacked with a sudden burst of energy from his Lambda Driver. The powerful surge took Kaname by surprise, blinding her with a flash of light and wreaking havoc on her monitors. She raised her shield in time to protect herself but could not withstand the shock wave that knocked her AS backward and onto the sand. Upon impact, one of her AS's 'wings' cracked and the circuits connecting her Lambda Driver and its palladium reactor power source were cut. Leonard took the opportunity to pounce onto her AS, his Avatara's foot crushing her machine's chest plate into the ground and pinning her down, with his blade ready to plunge into the cockpit and take her by one, Kaname watched her screens go blank as her A.I. went off-line, leaving only the front head camera operational so she could see the moment of her own death as if on television.

"_It's over, Kaname-san," _said Leonard gently. "_It would be a pity to kill you, but the price for insubordination in Amalgam is death_."

000

Just as Mao and her M9 were shot out of one of Danaan's launch pads and hurled back to the beach, Tessa lay quietly in Danaan's Lady Chapel capsule bed. From there, she resonated with Danaan's Lambda Driver and controlled the ship. This was, after all _her _ship. It was an extension of herself and no one knew the Tuatha de Danaan better than its creator, Teletha Testarossa. She closed her eyes and and tried to resonate with Kaname's stream of consciousness but found an empty expanse of nothingness between them.

"Please don't be dead, Kaname," whispered Tessa. "Sagara-san will be very sad, otherwise."

"Captain," said the voice of Danaan's A.I. "Enemy ship approaching at 25 knots, bearing 1-9-0 with missiles armed."

"Evasive maneuvers, Danaa," ordered Tessa. "Code sequence Teletha Alpha 2 – 00 E."

"Aye, Ma'am," responded the ship faithfully.

Back on the bridge, the crew fastened their saftety restraints as the submarine's main screen flashed a brief message from their Captain.

"_Let's do our best. Brace yourselves_."

As the Tuatha de Danaan dove into the depths of the dark ocean over the Mariana Trench, Tessa's consciousness slipped into the A.I.'s consciousness. The Leviathan matched Danaan's moves, pace for pace, and fired its portside missiles. Like a beautiful fish the Danaan wove in and out of the missile streams effortlessly, but she knew she wouldn't run forever. She would have to face the larger submarine in all out batted. She had already chosen their battlefield in the Trench. As she dove farther and farther away from the island she knew there was nothing else she could do for the ones she left behind on the base. She now had to worry about whether she would survive this fight in the dark waters.

000

Kurtz Weber shot his last chambered bullet of his powerful scoped sniper rifle into the barrels of one of the 30 mm machine guns positioned at the top of the enemy Behemoth's head. The impact of the blast as the bullet left the barrel pushed his head back. His long, blonde hair quivered in the movement, and a few beads of sweat flew off his brow. It was his lucky shot of the day, considering it had to be at exactly the right angle and close enough to make a difference. The offending Behemoth had threatened to fire on the island base's main building, where his commanding officer Kalinin and Mithril's top official, Sir Mallory were taking shelter. A handful of dual propeller helicopters were hovering over the horizon in the distance to claim them. Kurtz just had to stall for a few more minutes until Sir Mallory could get into one of the armored choppers and retreat to safety. Then Kurtz could get the hell off the roof since he was the prime target for all assaulting enemy AS's, foot soldiers and subsequently the massive Behemoth that stumbled out of the jungle.

Upon seeing his giant opponent Kurtz had to admit he was a little uncertain. But all he wanted now was to survive one more day.

"It's just the same as any other day, isn't it?" Kurtz said to himself as he hauled ass across the roof. The Behemoth was tilting forward and teetering as it short circuited from the the top down, and threatened to fall on top of him.

Suddenly, an M9 sprung onto the roof in front of him, picked him up and jumped off the building as the Behemoth came crashing down on that wing of the building. Personnel inside scrambled to get away from the crumbling debris. The first helicopter was touching down on the helicopter pad now. He could see that Sir Mallory and Kalinin were already on their way out of the building with other key personnel. Other non-essential personnel and combat personnel were ordered to stand their ground and fight to the death.

Kurtz coughed a little and looked up at the face of the M9 that had rescued him.

"Mao-san?" he asked curiously.

"_I'm determined to repay all my debts today,_" she said on ther loudspeaker.

"Where's Sousuke?" he asked.

"_I have no idea. I was looking for him when I came across you. He needs to help Kaname_."

"Kaname-chan's here?" asked Kurtz incredulously.

"_Piloting an AS and fighting an incredibly skilled pilot_ _to boot_," added Mao.

"Wow," he said with a whistle. "She leaves us for nearly a year and I feel like I don't even know her anymore," chuckled Kurtz.

"_She probably had a really hard time with Amalgam_," said Mao sympathetically. "_But it seems like her heart was always in the right place_."

"With Sousuke, you mean," he smiled.

"_Exactly_."

"This seems like a perfect day to tie up loose ends then, wouldn't you agree? My luck may not be so bad today after all," smiled Kurtz as she lowered him back down onto the floor.

"_Took the words right out of my mouth_," she answered.

"So if I live through today, do you think I can have a kiss?" he asked.

"_Are you trying to push your luck?" _she asked menacingly.

"No, not really," he chuckled and looked up at her AS as she looked down at him. "I'm serious." His face was honest for once, graced with an endearing smile. Mao was a little taken aback by his expression. It was the face of a trained soldier, perfectly accepting of whatever end awaited him, but hopeful of surviving.

"_I'll consider it_," she said after a little pause.

"That's good enough for me," he said. Without another word he dashed into the jungle and disappeared, looking for higher ground where he could be more useful.

000

Leonard Testarossa hesitated for a moment before he plunged his AS's blade into the chest plate and cockpit of Kaname's Avatara.

Though he was reluctant to kill her, Amalgam's higher ups would not be forgiving of her betrayal. He contemplated taking her alive to preserve the knowledge he had yet to delve into in her head. If taken alive, she would most likely be subject to torture and forceful retrieval of her knowledge by very crude means, and what would be left of Kaname would not resemble the goddess that Leonard adored.

Though her knowledge would be extremely helpful, his vision of world domination with Amalgam at the helm obliterating the need for war or hunger and thus creating harmony through control was still possible without Kaname. Monsieur Dubois and the Council could win the war against Mithril without her if the TDD-1 were destroyed and they took Sir Mallory's head as a trophy today. Therefore the only release for Kaname from her fate and her demons was death. Taking her life would be a merciful gesture from a fellow _Whispered_.

The blade shifted through the metal as it passed into Kaname's machine with an uncomfortable shrieking and scraping noise and the downed AS gave out little creaks and sighs as curcuits began to pop and explode and send out smoke through the open machine joints. Leonard's opponent lay limp on the ground. As he retracted his blade, the cockpit hatch came off of Kaname's AS revealing her still form inside in the pilot's seat. He paused to see if she was still breathing. Kaname stirred and opened her eyes at Leonard, her breathing labored.

His blade had come through the cockpit but missed the pilot. The metallic debris and miscellaneous machinery pulled apart from the cockpit as he plunged the blade into her AS had however sliced an open wound into her side.

She held her bleeding ribcage with one hand as she pulled herself up and out of the cockpit, positioning herself so she stood up and faced him, standing tall and upright. Her eyes shone with such brilliance that Leonard was in awe of her, all over again.

"It's not…over yet," said Kaname between breaths with a smile on her face as she fingered the bracelet around her wrist.

"_Something tells me that you're not telling me everything, Kaname-san_," he said.

"I've rigged enough C-4 on the Leviathan to sink it into the Trench forever," she confessed. "No one noticed while preparations for battle were underway. All I have to do now is push a button and I'll bring Amalgam to its knees. I had originally wanted to wait until we were both on board. We are the most dangerous of them all."

"_I'm impressed_," he answered and paused thoughtfully. "_But in working with you I realize you have an aversion to killing and death. Are you prepared to live with the blood of the Leviathan's crew on your hands?"_

"We do what we can to let those we love survive," responded Kaname simply, changing the words he had once spoken to her.

"_You don't have it in you," _he dared.

"You really should stop underestimating your opponents, Leonard," she said cryptically.

All of the sudden, Leonard nearly jolted out of his seat as Sousuke's Arbalest chraged his AS from the right. Kaname stood unblinking and expressionless as the two armed slaves collided with a loud, metallic 'clang' and toppled to the ground in a spray of sand and dust. A rush of wind blew her long hair to one side.

The Avatara charged its Lambda Driver once more and sent out a force field up against the Arbalest. Sousuke braced himself with his own shield and for a moment, the two shields abutting one another crackled and sparked with energy before the Arbalest was pushed backwards. The Arbalest landed on its feet and slid backwards for fifty meters on the sand.

"_You're in the way,_" said Leonard with quiet ferocity as he drew his cannon and fired a charged shot at Sousuke. Just as the shield around the Arbalest sizzled and absorbed the shot Leonard sprang forward with one of the Avatara's hands poised at the ready, palm down, to pierce Sousuke's barrier and take the Arbalest's head. His speed was incredible and Sousuke wasn't certain he could avoid Leonard's killing move. He fully charged his Lambda Driver and braced for impact when he suddenly heard a peculiar sound in the cockpit.

It was not unlike the sound of a pin dropping in the silent expanse of his mind. Time seemed to expand in that instant as he watched the Avatara moving in front of him, but as if standing still at the same time.

"_Sousuke,"_ said Kaname's voice.

"Kaname?" he asked, a little startled. They were resonating through his Lambda Driver.

"_Sousuke," _called again. "_How do you defeat a god_?"

"What?" he asked. He wasn't sure if he understood the question. But he looked over at Leonard's AS, knowing that it was dubbed the "Avatara" from the notes she had left him in Antarctica.

"_Pluck his wings_." And then her voice was gone. Time contracted again and once more Sousuke was face to face with the charging Avatara, now nearly upon him. They were only feet away from one another now, and time was bending at the force of their opposing Lambda Drivers.

Everything became clear. The fleeing island birds overhead. The electric blue sky pierced with gray smoke. The spray of white sand as Leonard came at him. The ribbon in Kaname's hair coming loose and carried up by the wind.

Sousuke could see Leonard's barrier waver and shift to a central point in it's striking arm as it came for the Arbalest's head.

"Seargent Sagara," warned the voice of his A.I. Al. It was apparent that should Leonard make contact the fight would then be over.

"I know," responded Sousuke as he simultaneously collapsed his barrier for close combat maneuvers and shifted the Arbalest's weight to one side. The Avatara's arm grazed the side of the Arbalest's head. As the Avatara was moving through its charge, the Arbalest spun round almost instantaneously and grabbed both silver wing-shaped exhausts under each arm and pulled hard. The stiff aluminum wings cracked, splintered and shattered as Leonard's momentum broke them off.

In the second before time started rolling at its regular momentum Leonard resonated with Kaname briefly.

_Be happy…sayonara…_

Kaname's eyes went wide and she blinked a single tear down her face.

Disconnected with it's power source and the Lambda Driver the Avatara crashed into the ground, face down and lifeless. As Sousuke turned around, a spark from the Avatara's circuitry ignited and caught fire. The energy collected in the Avatara's arm was released into the air, ripping part of the arm with it. The now unstable reactor exploded in a burst of light at the impact from the freed energy. Some of the nearby palm trees were either singed or alight. Sousuke watched the enemy AS burn, and as an afterthought tossed the broken silver wings onto the pyre. With no way for the cockpit hatch to open, Leonard would not have survived the explosions.

He watched a little longer as the black smoke spiraled into the sky, blotting out the sun. Then, with the Arbalest bent on one knee, he opened the cockpit hatch and jumped down. He turned a little anxiously to see Kaname still standing barefoot atop her fallen AS watching Leonard's machine burn, her life's blood leaving a dark red streak down her skirt on one side and onto her leg. In that vision she was both beautiful and terrifying, strong and frail all at once. He rushed to her.

"Kaname," he called out, standing in front of her with one arm extended. Her eyes turned towards him and she released a careful sigh and smiled. She eased herself down onto the arm of her AS, and from a sitting position there pushed herself off and into Sousuke's embrace.

"You're alive," she said with her face buried in his shoulder.

"Yeah, somehow," he responded. "Are you all right?"

"Mm," she nodded. "Somehow."

Sousuke breathed a sigh of relief for the first time in probably his entire life and with Kaname pressed tightly against him the dark veil lifted, and the world was once again filled with her brilliance.

* * *

Author's note: Happy Valentines Day! A very appropriate day to release this chapter, I think. I have to thank the reviewers (from my regulars Langus, sippingsodapop, Perpetual159 Lady Rinoa for all their constant support – and to the latest reveiwers , Sousuke's-girl and ArmorBlade) for keeping up with this story. I almost left this flapping in the wind too long.

I love CHABA's sound in "Parade" (Naruto Shippuden ed. theme #12) because the violin/koto combo is so fresh. The video reminds me of '80's New Age rock-- **(sigh) **the golden years….I was hitting writer's block the size of Mt. Fuji when I played the mp3 and thought I'd go through the entire 'parade' in one chapter (adventure, fortune, exhilaration, light/ dark, encounters, life, love).

Leonard had to go out in a blaze of glory--sorry Leonard fans. Sitting in prison is a little beneath him. Don't worry, more on Kurtz, Mao and Tessa to come. I'll give Sousuke and Kaname a little rest, since I'm sure they're tired. I realize that this is my longest story yet, and I apologize to my more impatient readers. It's almost over, though.

Hope you enjoyed!

-Kero (2/14/09)


	15. Until

**Chapter 15: Until**

_If I caught the world in a bottle_

_And everything was still beneath the moon_

_Without your love would it shine for me?_

_If I was smart as Aristotle_

_And understood the rings around the moon_

_What would it all matter if you loved me?_

_Oh, if I caught the world in an hourglass_

_Saddled up the moon and we would ride_

_Until the stars grew dim_

_Until the time that time stands still, Until..._

- verses from **Until,** by Sting

* * *

Bel couldn't believe his string of shitty luck. Last night he had lost to Kalinin and the Captain as he was teaching Tessa how to play poker but an unfortunate turn of events now made him short $500.00. In hindsight he wondered if they had hustled him.

But this was not the time for extraneous thoughts. He and Mao stormed through the dense jungle darkness of Meridia Island, dodging and firing at the enemy intermittently as they tried to put more distance between their units and the enemy Codarl. He had just taken a hit to his AS that put his infrared on the fritz. A cracked screen jettisoned a stray piece of glass across his face creating a constant trickle of blood down his forehead. Every time blood and sweat reached his eyes, it stung and blurred his vision and Bel had to hastily rub it aside as he continued to fight and bleed at the same time. Running low on ammunition, Bel wondered how long they were going to last without support from the Danaan and without guidance from Kalinin. The ground vibrated in slow, steady rhythms as the massive Behemoth they had provoked earlier slowly, but surely, was catching up with them.

There was only so far to run on an island. He would have to make do with night vision until daybreak. A handful of hours until the next sunrise stood between him and that uncertain future. If Bel lived through this night he promised himself that he would take the vacation time that had accumulated in his fifteen years of service with Mithril.

"We can't keep running in circles like this," said Mao over the radio.

"I'm open to any ideas at this point," responded Bel hastily. Just then, the pursuing team of five Codarl came out of the thick foliage and surrounded them. Without missing a beat Bel's AS reached down for its holstered blade and threw it expertly into the head of the first Codarl, forcing it to jerk back violently and then fall over with a loud crash. Almost simultaneously, Mao leaped forward and charged the nearest Codarl, throwing her AS's weight against it with its shoulder before it could activate any defense. Mao's lips curled upward as she knew she was dealing with a newbie pilot, most likely a young recruit of many who were mere foot soldiers to Amalgam. Surprised, the Codarl pilot did not react in time before Mao thrust her single dagger up through its armpit joint and severed its Lambda Driver connection.

Immediately thereafter, the remaining Codarl units went into ECM mode. Bel was certainly at a disadvantage at that point. Still undaunted Mao fired a spray of bullets where she thought the next closest enemy unit should be, nicking one in the shoulder. The enemy fired back and missed her as she dodged into the thick jungle. Guerilla tactics only worked so well with Codarl equipped with infrared, Lambda Drivers and night vision. Mao quickly leaped again and kept moving to avoid being a sitting target.

Another Codarl pounced onto Bel, who didn't see him coming, and Bel was knocked back and thrown onto the jungle floor. As the enemy unit raised its electro-magnetic baton to pierce Bel's AS in the chest it suddenly stopped. Looking up at the enemy unit's arms mysteriously frozen in mid motion, Bel realized that the Codarl's hands were caught in cable wire wound up tightly around its wrists. Just as mysteriously the Codarl was suddenly jerked backwards off of Bel. The instant it hit the jungle floor a bright projectile shot out of the dark pierced its head causing a mini explosion. Bel got back up and scanned the surrounding darkness.

"Sousuke!" exclaimed Mao. While the Codarl units were distracted, she fired a single shot into the head of another enemy unit, and it too exploded. Now there was only one functioning enemy unit left. Rushing out of the darkness and leaping over Mao the Arbalest's perfect silhouette against the glow of the moon was eerily beautiful. The Codarl raised its metal shield to protect against the imminent attack but Sousuke's next bullet glowed a brilliant luminescent hot white as it pierced through the shield, exploded through the Codarl's chest and lodged its casing deep into the thick trees beyond. The last Codarl fell to the ground like a limp doll with barely a creak.

The ground vibrated loudly and a deafening crash sounded behind them. They all looked up to see a giant Behemoth peering down at them over the twisted jungle branches.

"Run!" shouts Sousuke over the radio. They each leaped away as the Behemoth fired a shot down at them causing mushroom shaped inferno and a giant crater on the jungle floor where they had stood a moment ago. A spray of charred jungle debris and sand launched into the air behind them, scorching the metal on Bel's unit. Visibility was zero now for both sides as they tried to break away in the smoke from the Behemoth and take better cover. A direct hit would mean the end for either Bel or Mao.

Sousuke leaped up onto a tall pile of volcanic rock to draw the Behemoth's attention away from his comrades. The Behemoth took another massive shot at him and Sousuke leaped gracefully into the air doing a flip and a half twist as he landed further away. The shot was immediately followed by a spray of bullets piercing into the dusty air from humongous Gatling gun mounted on the enemy unit's massive head.

The sudden sound of metal on metal meant that some of the bullets had made contact with a target. Bel shouted profanities as his M-9 went down when some of the bullets pierced through one of his knee joints. Bel's AS was down on one knee and he knew there was no getting back up now.

Just then, a single rifle shot whizzed by the Behemoth's line of sight, drawing its attention away from Bel. The Behemoth turned to see Kurtz on the nearby hilltop and it pummeled the hillside with its rocket launcher sending rocks and patches of dirt flying every which way. Kurtz went flying up into the air and landed into the cluster of jungle brush below. Large boulders were dislodged and rolled to the ground with a dull rumble in his direction.

"Kurtz!" shouted Mao with concern. Sousuke felt panic rise in his chest as he wondered if his friend had lived through the explosion.

_Sousuke,_ said Kaname, resonating with his Lambda Driver once more. Though she was safely watching the battle from a distance her voice sounded like she was in the cockpit with him. Her presence calmed him as her mind enveloped his. He had the distinct sensation of being warmly embraced by her. _Concentrate. _In a matter of seconds, Kaname communicated with him using mental images of the Lambda Driver piercing through the knee joint of the Behemoth, as the easiest means to immobilize it_. _

Without questioning it, Sousuke triggered the power in his Lambda Driver and envisioned the bullet going through the knee joint. He let the bullet fly as it pierced the Behemoth's fortified armor into the knee and exploded. Collapsing to the left, the Behemoth could not regain its center of gravity and came down with a thunderous crash.

Bel stumbled out of his now useless M-9 towards the pile of rubble where Kurtz was last seen. As he climbs over the debris he saw Kurtz lying face up on a pile of rocks.

"Weber! Are you all right?" he called out. Kurz opened his eyes briefly and gave his captain a thumbs up sign. With a small moan he passed out again.

"Kurtz, you idiot," scolded Mao, as Bel checked his body for serious wounds. Strangely enough, there was no real head trauma aside from a slight concussion on his forehead. The rest of the impact was absorbed by his AS pilot suit.

"This fool may be the luckiest one of us all," commended Bel with a smirk.

"Was that the last of them?" asked Mao looking around. The island was quiet again, for the most part. One the sound of intermittent gunfire was heard in the distance. But otherwise, their location seemed secured.

"Let's hope so," replied Bel.

In his cockpit, Sousuke scanned his multiple screens for any other movement or heat signatures. There were none.

"Are there any enemy units in the near vicinity, Al?" asked Sousuke to his unit's A.I.

"Negative, Sergeant."

"Check trace ECM residuals."

"Done. No traces of ECM waves, Sergeant."

"Good job, partner," sighed Sousuke.

"Thank you," it responded. Sousuke leaned back and thought of his next move.

"Sergeant, " said Bel from below. "We're going to take Kurtz back to base to get some medical aid. We need you to secure the compound."

"I need to retrieve Chidori," said Sousuke over his loudspeaker. "She could also use some first aid." Sousuke looked up to the cliff where Kaname had been standing but to his dismay, found that she was gone.

000

Kaname had wandered away from Sousuke's battle when his victory was nearly assured. She stood atop the cliff on the other side, looking over the length of the crescent shaped island and down grimly at the scene below her feet. Patches of red flame sent columns of black smoke into the night air. She marveled at the ease at which Amalgam could send so many to die for nothing and the ferocity with which Mithril resisted annihilation. Both sides were fighting for what they believed in. Kaname wondered if there could ever be a time when there was no war being fought anywhere in the world. For some reason, the cool island breeze made her reminiscent of the Italian villa where she last resided, and Leonard's smile--a smile she would never see again.

"Damn you for messing with my head," she cursed quietly and ran her hand through her hair. "Even when you're dead."

_Will Mithril be able to recover from this? _she wondered. Would Amalgam continue to move forward without Leonard? Though she was never directly involved in the hierarchy of Amalgam, she wondered how extensive the organization was. If it was anything like Mithril, it was most likely very difficult to exterminate. For as long as Amalgam existed, Mithril had to survive. For the first time in a long time, emotion came back to Kaname's heart and she trembled with anger. She thought about the fools who wanted world domination to promote peace. She thought of Kenji's lonely eyes.

"Amalgam should not be allowed to do as it pleases for profit," she said to no one in particular. Her own words sounded foreign in her ears. She had never been so passionate about anything in her life but she was determined now. Whatever it took, even until she drew her last breath, she was going to destroy Amalgam for taking away the old life she loved so well. Gone were the days of blissful ignorance and the frivolous expanse of innocent possibility. Her path seemed set now and there was no turning back. Perhaps it had always been predetermined.

Clenching her fists and her teeth she looked away from the carnage and into the dark sea that seemingly stretched on forever before her. The path in front of her was shrouded in darkness and completely uncertain now. But _he_ would be by her side no matter what. The cool wind stirred her disheveled hair and she closed her eyes.

_Kaname? _asked Tessa, resonating with her mind. The voice was very faint, as if from far away.

"Tessa," said Kaname aloud, opening her eyes and trying to peer into the darkness of the sea. The clouds gave way to the moon once more and the layer of soft light glowed over the island. Kaname's bloodstained white dress looked dramatically angelic in that light.

_Kaname, I'm so happy you're alive,_ said Tessa in her mind.

_It would take more than that to kill me. I've lived through tougher times with Sousuke in high school_, she joked.

_I wish I could go back to high school with you. It was fun, wasn't it?_

There was a hint of sadness and longing in Tessa's mind. It sounded too fatalistic and final for Kaname's tastes. No matter if Tessa was her rival, she wanted to see her again and feel the warmth of her pretty smile. Kaname had no idea what kind of danger Tessa was in now. She wanted to believe that the captain of the Danaan was savvy enough to live through it.

After a brief pause, Kaname hesitantly added, _Leonard is dead._

_I know._

_I'm sorry._

_Don't be. I was going to kill him myself._

Kaname wondered about the cold reaction from Leonard's sister._ Aren't you sad?_

_A little. _Kaname wondered if Tessa was sad that her brother was dead, or sad that she couldn't kill him herself.

_Tessa, would you be mad at me if I chose Sousuke? _she thought, a little hesitantly.

_Are you going to tell him that you love him?_

_I think I will,_ responded Kaname.

A thoughtful silence was followed by, _I know that he has loved you for a long time and that he would follow you anywhere no matter what. I wish you both happiness._

_You won't resent me?_

_Maybe a little bit._

_I want you to find your own happiness too, Tessa. _A surge of warmth surrounded Kaname's mind and she responded in kind.

At that point, the resonance faded and was severed. Kaname opened her eyes again and stared blankly at the dark sea below. The sound of the waves crashing on the rocks was calming. The white foam of the crested waves were illuminated by the moonlight and the surface of the waters was otherwise calm. There was no trace of the Tuatha de Danaan anywhere.

000

She had no time to mourn the loss of her only sibling or the loss to her rival in love. Both seemed inconsequential at the moment. As the Leviathan was closing in on the Danaan various alerts and sensor blips chimed in the Lady Chapel, the cockpit of her submarine. Her ship had not yet been fully restocked with missiles upon hasty departure and most of her crew were still on the island. Tessa hoped that they were still alive but based upon various reports the invasion on Meridia had been merciless. Using Dana's sensors, a three dimensional topographical map of the surrounding underwater terrain spread across her field of vision. The controls within the glass capsule of Lady Chapel were controlled with the mind through the prototype Lambda Driver of the ship. Even as the Tuatha de Danaan was moving as fast as it could go, the Leviathan was catching up. Before her, the terrain was constantly changing, shifting. The jagged underwater cliffs and peaks moved up and down in an archaic dance alongside the Danaan as she sped along. Tessa could see that up ahead they were approaching a deep trench with high jutted rocks. It was the beginning underwater canyons of the Mariana. With only a few missiles left, she had to plan her strategy. At best, she could hope to slow the Leviathan but not destroy it, and somehow make her escape.

The Leviathan wasted no time firing an array of missiles towards the Dannaan at that moment. More bells and whistles sound, but the Danaan moved gracefully to the side at the very last moment to avoid the oncoming barrage. The Leviathan was testing her abilities without the help of her crew. The next missiles would be tracers that would require heavy evasive maneuvers. But, the enemy failed to assess that this was _her_ ship. Its specs and blueprints had been in her mind even through childhood. Her ship was a long time friend and companion in that respect and she knew and understood "Dana" better than anyone.

As she steadily wove through the stacks of underwater boulders jutting out of the ground Tessa fired her second to last remaining missile. Her sensors told her that she had only succeeded in a partial hit, but the projectile had also bounced off the hard shell of the Leviathan and exploded. The rocky cliffs crumbled as an after effect of the detonation.

Now down to her last missile aboard the entire ship, she had little to no other options. Charging up the Lambda Driver within the heart of her submarine Tessa took a deep breath. Whether or not she succeeded would depend on the strength of her will. Amid the dirt and debris kicked up in their maneuvers and the shower of projectiles coming from her enemy, Tessa took a deep breath, calculated the time delay in her AI's Lambda Driver, the propulsion of her missile, with the missile's trajectory and torque as well as her speed in knots against the upcoming rock formation on her screen. She needed some cover to accomplish this feat. Though it very nearly physically pained her to do so, Tessa recklessly drove Danaa into the cliff face, shearing off piles of boulders upon impact as the submarine's metal hull screeched and scraped against it. Danaa's armor was a composite metal of light weight, able to reflect heat but sturdy enough to withstand deep sea pressure. It was not however designed for head on collisions or impact with other hard objects. It's brittle nature gave way to the violent force of the stationary underwater mountain and several warnings rang throughout the ship as the Danaan's hull collapsed in various places, taking on water at several levels. Simultaneously gliding away from the cliff face Tessa monitored the water intake and closed off portions of the ship to prevent total immersion in water. Danaa was noticeably slower now with the extra weight but Tessa only needed a moment to fulfill her plan. Danaa disappeared from the Leviathan's screen in the shower of rock and debris and dust it had kicked up in the collision with the mountainside. The sonar screen picked up hundreds of blips as rocks of all shapes and sizes came showering down and it was impossible to distinguish them from the Danaan at that instant.

She fired her last shot with the propulsion and determination of her will driven Lambda Driver.

The Leviathan raised its shield automatically and the friction between the two force fields glowed unnaturally in the dark abyss.

The crew from the Leviathan marveled at the roaring sound of the battle of the two wills: the will of the Leviathan to crush its enemy and the will of the Tuatha de Danaan to stay alive.

"Sir, the shield is shutting down!" said one man at the helm. "It's down 50%!"

"Impossible!" shouted Monsieur Dubois.

"Now at 40%," said another frantically.

"Raising Lambda Driver tolerances now to compensate!" shouted another.

"No good, Lambda Driver is at its maximum! Down to 15%!"

Monsieur Dubois tapped the arm of his captain's chair noisily. Though he considered himself an expert tactician in underwater sea battles he realized now the difference between the Whispered and normal humans. "You little...."

But before he could finish the sentence, Tessa's missile pierced through the shield blinding the screens on the bridge of the Leviathan and silencing its crew with an explosion. Though the missile was not long range or particularly powerful, it made contact through the bridge and its explosion set off the C-4 Kaname had planted earlier. Explosion after explosion hit each level and the Leviathan sank deeper and deeper into the Trench.

The remaining crew on the bridge of the Tuatha de Danaan cheered as they watched the Leviathan go down. But even Tessa was a bit startled at the extent of the damage. At once she understood that Kaname must have sabotaged the ship--perhaps as a last resort should all else fail. Tessa quietly thanked Kaname as she ordered her submarine to rise. From here on out she knew that Mithril had gained an important ally.

000

Sousuke climbed to the top of the high hill without difficulty. His eyesight adjusted as he searched the near vicinity for her. Dawn was fast approaching. The almost empty feeling crept back to his heart as he thought perhaps Kaname had left him again--that somehow, he was no enough for her. But it quickly subsided as he saw her solitary figure overlooking the ocean, her pale dress shifting softly in the wind as she stared into the waning darkness, lost in her thoughts.

He wanted to hold her but stood by watching her in silence. He just wanted to be near. At first he thought that perhaps it was the brightly lit colorful world she lived in as a high school student that attracted him and drew him towards her. That life was vibrant, surprising and calming in its monotony--something so different from what he was used to and what he had been brought up in all his life. From getting hair cuts to eating chocolate parfaits it was all strangely refreshing to him. He tried his best to fit in knowing that it was almost impossible, if only to stay with her a little longer. Being near her made everything possible.

When they were apart the light in the world dimmed. Even worse, when she left him for Leonard he thought the world to be a cold, dark place that could never regain light or warmth again. Then the brief sight of her in Antarctica and again in Russia somehow became enough to sustain him when he thought his heart was starving to death. It was enough to simply follow her, no matter where she went. No matter how long she would stay away from him. Though she had been gone from his side the hints that she left behind to help him, the expressions she sent his way when their eyes met ever so briefly those times told him that at least she did not hate him. But it was not until he saw her again on Meridia Island that he realized the intensity of his feelings towards her. He loved her so much that he didn't feel whole without her. If she didn't feel the same way, it wouldn't matter. He simply needed to know. Sousuke climbed the hill to find out.

He walked silently to her side and she turned on queue, as if she had been expecting him all this time. Wordlessly she slipped herself into his embrace and held him tightly.

"Tessa is safe. I know it," she said quietly.

"That's a relief," he responded numbly. The pressure of her body against his sent electric waves through him, and he was uncertain if he could remain still or even standing for much longer. Love was such a draining, useless emotion, he had once thought. But he was now bound by and voluntarily immersed in it nonetheless.

"Did you secure the compound?" she asked.

"Affirmative."

Kaname looked up at him and wondered how much he had suffered in her absence and then wondered how much of that was her fault. A wave of guilt came over her and she hugged him again tightly.

"Kaname?" asked Sousuke with uncertainty. The sound of her name on his lips made her feel a little blush in her cheeks.

"I'm sorry," she said finally.

"For what?"

"I just am," she replied. "You've suffered a lot, I can tell." Kaname buried her face in his collar. "I'm so happy to be with you again. I had almost forgotten...."

Kaname pulled back and looked him straight in the eye. She had to finally say it or else he would never know. She opened her mouth and let the words roll gently off her lips and tongue.

Sousuke stared at her blankly as he listened to her words. The world went silent and calm and his heart beat in his ears like a steady drum. Her words wrapped around his mind and his core like a bright stream of light holding his sanity and his reason in one tight embrace.

_I had almost forgotten how much I loved you_. He couldn't believe what he had just heard.

The light on the horizon grew brighter as the dawn gave way to the morning sun, brimming with warmth and lighting the way for the world. Sousuke held Kaname tightly as they stood together to greet the sun.

"Stay with me," was all he said as a fresh morning wind picked up, breathing new life into both of them. "Until...."

"I will," she responded gently, her head against his shoulder as the morning view filled her.


	16. Postlude in G Major

**Epilogue: Postlude in G Major**

The busy world of Tokyo pedestrians was oblivious to the young woman with the long, beautiful hair who sat alone in a nearly empty street side cafe. Her chic light rain coat matched the crisp linen table cloth covering her table. The establishment had just recently opened, but this was perhaps the one and only chance she would have to try it.

Her high collar partially hid her face as she lifted the cup of coffee to her lips. Several groups, large and small pass by in their various school uniforms. Though she had often walked with them on the very sidewalks before her, passing the same street vendors and people on a daily basis back then, she was a stranger to them now, and they to her.

Spilling out from the small leather brief case on the table were her cell phone and a few documents. Kaname had just reviewed an intelligence report from Wraith on Amalgam. As expected, others have risen up to fill the void left behind by Dubois and Leonard. Whether or not they were of the same quality as the former leadership remained to be seen. Certainly, Amalgam still had enough resources to pose a threat to the world. Mithril would be watching.

A small file folder on top of the stack included specs to new technology Leonard had left behind. This had been raided from the Italian villa where she had once lived. Recognizing his handwriting on one of the plans, Kaname sat back and tapped her fingers lightly on the pages. With her mind going through the various specs and notes in her head she thought carefully of some countermeasures she might be able to employ if ever Sousuke or the others were going to face this new beast Amalgam was planning to build. As she heard his footsteps approaching, she put the report and other documents away in her briefcase and tucked away her Mithril identification card that read, "KANAME CHIDORI, Technical Division Consultant."

Sousuke approached her table and quietly pulled up a chair placing two one-way bullet train tickets to Nagoya on the table. The arrangements had already been made by the Mithril intelligence division. The furniture to their apartment would be set up shortly before their arrival. Kaname only had one more thing to do before they were on their way. She slid out an envelope with a handwritten letter to her father and sister from her brief case. Her family had wondered why they had not heard from her in a while, but they were not overly concerned as all of the previous communications and messages from Jindai High School regarding her disappearance had been intercepted by Amalgam before. She had disappeared over a year ago now, and the police considered her case a cold case file. Even her friends had given up on her ever returning. They did hope secretly that she and Sousuke were together and happy.

Kaname had the Mithril intelligence division create a dummy corporation to convince her family that she had been hired as a consultant with them, which wasn't too far from the truth. Though she had never really graduated from Jindai High, they also forged her diploma and sent it back home to him. She wrote in her letter that she would be doing extensive traveling for the company, and it was providing room and board for her in Nagoya while she completed her externship. The only return address she could give them was a post office mailbox, however, to keep them at arms length.

Just then, as Sousuke and Kaname were getting ready to depart, Ono-D and Kyouko walked by the storefront directly opposite of them across the street, unaware of the couple watching them intently. They laughed cheerfully as they waited at the stop for their morning bus to take them to their college campus nearby.

Kaname almost immediately stood up, unable to take her eyes off of them, and her mouth partially opened to shout out a greeting to them, but she held back. Sousuke placed his hand over hers. She looked at him and gave him one of her bright, signature smiles.

"I know," she said as she watched them board their bus. "It's just really good to see them again."

"I know," Sousuke smiled. He offered her his hand and helped her up.

"Do you miss it? The life you had with them?" he asked quietly.

"I do. But now I can live a life moving forward on my own terms, and I don't have to hide what I am or what I can do. And I'm still among friends." It was not an easy thing to accept her fate. She had spent many months at Leonard's side trying to find her place in the world. Now Kaname's job was to protect everyone and everything important to her, including those she left behind in her old life, and especially Sousuke. She readily put her talents to use for this one objective.

Kaname felt reinvigorated as the caffeine started to kick in and she tugged him along behind her as they left the cafe for the train station. Her single carat synthetic diamond ring on her left hand glittered in the morning light. Though it could also be activated as a tracking beacon, it was by far the best present Sousuke had ever given her.

_Finis_.

* * *

Author's notes: I finally caught up with the novels and am currently awaiting the release of the next novel that Gatoh-san indicates is the "climax" of his stories. Though his plot was not what I expected and he killed off some and made traitors of others, I really want to know what happens next. His spin on the story was entirely different from what I had imagined for Kaname and Sousuke. I thought my story was dark, but his is MUCH darker, so I really hope that another publisher picks up the novels for everyone to be able to read.

My story for Kaname makes her stronger, choosing the wrong path and then finding some redemption in the right one, with a new purpose. She rises up to the challenge and reinvents herself in a new life, leaving her innocence behind, but her strength and her determination intact. Her love is what guided her back to Sousuke and vice versa. (It's just like him to give her practical jewelry, isn't it?)

I hope you liked it. I tried not to make too much of a denouement in the end or tie everything up with a pretty bow. My apologies to Tessa, Mao and Kurtz fans. That's all I had to say about them, so you can use your imaginations to figure out what happens next. No one dies in my stories.

Until next time,

-Kero (9/1/09)


End file.
